Why to people say hateful things and then regret it later?
I believe that when people say hateful things they are in the moment feeling hostile. Later, when the fire of anger has cooled, they reveal that what they may have said or done, they really don't mean. Often the emotion that comes out as anger is covering up some hurt. For example, in a marriage a husband may respond to his wife's sharp tongue by getting angry or blaming her for something. In reality he may be feeling as though she does not love or respect him because of the sharp tone she used to begin with. Getting angry with her prevents him from feeling so hurt.
I swore at a senior sister about nine months ago at work, and I even used the 'F' word, something I probably had not done before... all my life.
Why did I do it? I was in pain and suffering badly... inside. The worst place to suffer. You would be better asking the cause of suffering?
We grasp, cling, crave or desire... have expectations....and so on. I won't poo-poo these things, as they are all a part of growth. A pure man won't make us suffer; neither a snow-white girl. How many of them do you know? Still, I would encourage you to strive, keep going, believe.. Love Something Higher. Much Love.
Most hateful words when spoken in the heat of the moment are not really expressions of hate, but expressions of anger and impatience. The regret comes into play when we realize that there were probably much better ways to address the situation, knowing that we are not hateful people.
If one uses GOD'S WORD (which "seems" hateful to the world); they NEVER "regret it!: There's a difference between "Spiritual" hate and "natural" hate! IF one LOVES GOD, he "keeps HIS commands" and FOLLOWS HIS EXAMPLE!
Society via RELIGION has come to the conclusion that GOD is ALL LOVE and so were your parents but they (as GOD) would discipline and/or "whip your behind!" Since GOD is OUR FATHER, why don't all expect the same of HIM? Hebrews 12:9 says "Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which "corrected" us, and we gave them reverence; shall we not much rather be in subjection unto THE FATHER of spirits, and live?"
Everyone wants to "say" GOD is my FATHER, but when it comes to "correction," as children we say "HE (aka GOD/WORD) HATES" and perceive the one giving HIS WORD as "HATE!" Hebrews 12:11 says "Now no chastening for the present "seemeth" joyous, but grievous: nevertheless AFTERWARD it yieldeth the PEACEABLE fruit of "righteousness" UNTO THEM WHICH ARE EXERCISED THEREBY."
Therefore, why don't man stop looking at "correction" from "their" FATHER as "HATE" and allow themselves to be "exercised thereby" to "yield the peaceable fruit of righteousness" if they LOVE "their" FATHER? You did with your "natural" father, and didn't turn out so bad; so why not your HEAVENLY FATHER and receive "righteousness?"
Spiritual things are hard to swallow for the "natural man!" I guarantee you, when one "yields" to "correction" from our HEAVENLY FATHER, you will not "regret it" in this life nor in the life to come! I know I certainly don't "regret" giving HIS WORD! Although I may suffer small persecutions by man, it's NOTHING in comparison to the joy I receive in preaching HIS WORD for my desire is as GOD'S - "No one is lost" (II Peter 3:9)!
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