A Cutting-Edge Christmas " Letter From Jesus"

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   DrDeanCrosbyposted 14 years ago

   Have you ever wondered what Jesus thinks about people celebrating His birthday by engaging in pagan practices such as the worship of trees by spending hours decorating them and then placing expensive  materialistic junk gifts at their base? Well you've come to the right place.Wonder no more! The creative writing  letter below written by an anonymous author will tell you like it is spiritually.
   
   My Dear Loved Ones,
   
   Wow, it's time for my birthday again! Last year, loads of people had a huge party for me and it seems like they will again this year. After all they've been shopping and preparing for it for months now and there have been announcements and advertisements almost every day about how soon it's coming! In fact they started promoting it this year  even before Satan's holiday,Halloween.
   
   A lot of people really do go overboard about my birthday, but it's nice to know that at least one day of the year so many people are thinking about me a little.And I do mean a little! It seems that most folks are missing the point of it all. Last year, for example, when my birthday came around they threw a big party, but can you believe it, I wasn't even invited! The guest of honor, and they forgot all about me? They had begun preparing for the festivities months in advance, but when the big day came, I was left out in the cold.  Well, frankly it's  happened so many times in recent years, I wasn't even surprised.
   
   Even though I wasn't invited again this year to the White House party, as I haven't for decades now,I thought I'd just quietly slip in anyway. So I came in and stood off to the side.Just as I  thought,everyone just ignored me.  Everyone was drinking, laughing and having a grand time, when all of a sudden in came this fat fellow in a bright red suit, wearing a phony white beard and shouting, "Ho, Ho, Ho!"  He looked like he already  had more than enough to drink. When he collapsed into a big armchair, all the children went running over to him excitedly yelling, "Satan"  or maybe it was   "Santa!";one or the other. The thought kept occurring to me that  he was the guest of honor and the whole holiday was just for him.
   
   Oh I wanted to tell you that the  little manger scene some of you have put in the corner of your living rooms is really touching.THANK YOU! It makes me happy to see that  people commemorate my birthday like that. Did you know that nowadays, in some countries like the United States the authorities won't even allow manger scenes to be placed in parks, streets, or public places anymore? And their schools,well I don't even want to think about them! What could be more innocent than a manger scene to remind people of my birthday?They've actually passed laws against them and made it illegal to show them now.
   
   Another thing that amazes me is how, on my birthday, instead of giving me presents, most people give gifts to each other. And to top it all off, it's usually all kinds of stuff they don't even need and  often just return to the stores to get money.Let me ask you, wouldn't you find it odd if when your birthday came along, all your friends decided to celebrate it by giving each other presents and never gave you a thing?Someone once told me, "Well, it's because you're not around like other people are, so how can we give you a present?" You already know my answer to that one. Give gifts of food and clothing to the poor, help those who really need it.  Trust me any gift you give to your forsaken fellow man, I'll count as if you gave it to me personally. I promise.
   
   You know there has to be an end even to my patience. I've been planning on a spectacular finish for quite sometime. I've decided to throw my own party and invite only the people I want to celebrate with!
   It's going to be the most fantastic celebration of my birthday anyone can possibly imagine. It won't happen next year,its scheduled for 2012, but I'm sending out the invitations now. Sorry my Father has told me I shouldn't let people know the exact hour or even day of the event but I  know you'll want to come no matter what month it occurs in. There will  be room for thousands. Some really famous old timers and celebrities are going to be there, and I'll reserve you a seat of honor right there with them if you really want to come.
   
   So stay on course  because when everything is ready, I'm going to spring it on the whole world as a huge surprise. Many people are going to be left in the heat because they didn't answer my invitation,so let me know right away if you'd like to come. If you do I'll send my Holy Spirit to give you the directions so you won't get lost trying to find me.PLEASE ,PLEASE BELIEVE ME THIS TIME!
   
   
   Sending My Love To You,
   Your Savior
   

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      Beelzedadposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      LOL! Good one!

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   Mark Ewbieposted 14 years ago

   I suspect your letter is some kind of email con.
   
   Fortunately I got a letter from him this morning.
   
   Hi dude.
   
   Looking forward to Xmas?  Of course you are, life is tough sometimes.  Hope you have a great party and do some of that family stuff - it's important.
   
   If you can make it to church, or maybe sing some carols - whatever, that's cool.
   
   If you can't, well, each to their own and I love you anyway.
   
   Ciao. J.

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   paradigmsearchposted 14 years ago

   Re: OP, not bad.

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   pennyofheavenposted 14 years ago

   Apparently its not even his birthday. So I don't know what he's complaining about. And about the invited. There are no invites to the ones who have never heard of him. If he has just sent out the invites they have one year to get their act together. Thats kinda unfair.

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