How do you get away from people who always fussing about stuff?

1. 40

   legitimoposted 12 years ago

   How do you get away from people who always fussing about stuff?

   replyreport
2. 77

   K. Burns Darlingposted 12 years ago

   There are several of those fussy people in my family,  they are never happy with what they have, and are incapable of being happy for the sake of someone else. They whine,  they nag,  they complain,  and they gossip,  all of which I find to be poor character traits; But they are family, and while I can avoid them some of the time, I can't avoid them all of the time, so here are a few of the tricks that I use to survive them.  At family functions such as large holiday get-togethers, birthday parties, weddings and yes, even funerals, for the true fussbudget knows no bounds when they've a captive audience, I am the person who is busy.  I am helping the hostess, chasing the children, washing the dishes, taking the pictures, serving the food, making the trash run, and doing the clean-up...whatever needs to be done, I am your girl!   This really does work, because as I've learned over time, the last thing that a fussbudget wants to do is be of actual help to anyone else.  When trapped in closed quarters with them, I find that an easy deterrent is to either changed the subject,  talk about something they care nothing about, world peace, the state of the economy, saving the environment,  whatever subject is farthest away from whatever topic it is that they are wanting to fuss about.  You may have to do this repeatedly, as in the belief that what they have to say is more important than God, they tend to talk over the top of others.  Read a book, this won't stop them from fussing, but it does give you something to focus on and sometimes it has helped me drown them out. If all else fails, feign sleep, Once trapped in a car for 46 hours with two of these fussy people on the way to a family reunion, I pretended to be asleep for nearly a day and a half, waking up for bathroom breaks and food stops, once back in the car, I went right back to sleep.  Last bit of advice from my bag of tricks....Fussy people like to talk on the phone, once they have you there, they don't care what you are doing, or where you are at, I have solved this problem with discretionary use of my caller id,
   Hope this helps you out some.

   replyreport
3. 40

   legitimoposted 12 years ago

   yes,some of your tricks do work . But, what if they live right down stairs , no matter you could be sleep, they bust right into your room . If its not about the grass,money,food,clothes-dirty or clean.I feel like a little kid at 44yrs old. This has got to stop . I could be reading on line , I don't ever respond about the problem. If I do then that is a argument.I truly think they woke me up on the wrong side of the bed on purpose.

   replyreport
4. 80

   Guyana Masalaposted 12 years ago

   You know, coming from the perspective of someone who has been screamed out of her sleep (more than once) I understand this completely. There's a certain group of ungracious people who are miserable with themselves and will use those around them to distract from all the things they could be working on to make themselves happy. That is until they drive everyone away from them and they're forced to face themselves, by themselves. (Oh, please don't tell them that though because you'll start an argument...they don't usually want to actually hear any truth.)
   
   In the meantime ignoring them is likely the only solution, though sometimes they make that very hard. I have to agree with K. Burns Darling about the phone though. If you establish a reliable line of communication where they get a sense of being able to fuss at you through some channel, you can now keep a safe distance and monitor the access they have to you. With that you can truely start controlling their access and limit the types and frequency of contact with them. Be forewarned though: when I first did this I got voicemail with screaming messages on it that shocked me to no end. They didn't like being trained and wanted to fight against being limited to harassing me. That is, until I learned to use the delete button before even listening. That's when the real fun began. LOL Good luck & happy monitoring. It did work for me and we lived in the same house.

   replyreport