how do I handle a slick liar who I have to work with?

1. 49

   susan romeoposted 15 years ago

   how do I handle a slick liar who I have to work with?

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2. 77

   advisor4qbposted 15 years ago

   These people are hard to deal with, and sometimes they cause more problems than they are worth.  However, in this day and age, with the economy the way it is, we might have to just suck it up and deal with goofballs in the workplace, unfortunately. 
   
   I despise liars.  So it is hard for me to sympathize with the other side on this one (normally I look at things from both sides).  I also have to say that you have not given much information on the situation, such as whether or not it is easy to avoid them altogether, and whether or not they are lying about YOU.
   
   If your work is being affected by this person's influence, you may want to have a brainstorming session with someone familiar with the situation before just going to the boss for help.  Bosses don't normally want to deal with petty grievances, and unfortunately, it may end up being the slick liar who gets promoted.  Keep this in mind when burning bridges with him.
   
   I would say beat him at his own game.  Think fast and be quick witted (like most liars are).  If he is lying about you, you can probably find a way to prove him wrong publicly, if you think about it long enough.
   
   You may want to read the Book of Esther in the Bible and see how she handled Haman.  Sometimes, the best way to deal with slick people is by being shrewd yourself.

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3. 67

   Theo Sellesposted 15 years ago

   Sadly, there are a certain percentage of people who are pathological liars, meaning that they lie without even thinking about it as being a lie. In fact, they may even believe the reality that they construct.
   
   Then there are the manipulative liars, fully aware of what they are about and being strategic about making others look bad and themselves appear better in comparison. These people will lie about the work they themselves do, and they will lie to you and about you to other people.
   
   Once you've figured out that you are dealing with either type of liar, you must take steps to protect yourself and your reputation in the organization. Here are some techniques that you can use:
   
   1)Very quickly avoid trying to resolve issues with them as you would with a person of integrity. All that does is put you in a situation of vulnerability. They will just use the information you share with them and will see your efforts to resolve issues with them as an indication of weakness.
   
   2)Calmy and directly confront the liar immediately upon the lie-whether it occurs in front of witnesses or not. Simply state the truth and then avoid the crazy arguing that the liar will try to engage you in. If that person is a liar, it's not just you in the organization that will know it, and your standing up to him or her might give someone else the courage to do so as well. A liar is a bully, and bullies need standing up to or they run amok.
   
   3)NEVER meet alone with a liar to resolve a situation as you would a regular colleague. Doing so will set you up for further lies, including accusations on their part that you were inappropriate or abusive somehow. Remember, they will lie, and also, since they lie, any agreement or resolution the two of you come up with will be broken by them anyway. Always try to have a witness in your dealing with a liar.
   
   4)Document! Don't let a situation develop where it's your word against his or hers. Liars can be very smooth and practised in presenting a distorted reallity to your organziational superiors.
   
   5)Let your integrity shine! Don't stoop to the liars level. Show your integrity consistently in such a way that if it ever comes down to your boss or others having to believe you or the liar it will be no contest.
   
   Good question.
   
   Theo

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4. 0

   reeltaulkposted 15 years ago

   you dont handle them.....ignore them, it will confuse the hell out of them.  Only interact when necessary

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5. 51

   inc999posted 15 years ago

   when you need to have some fun just listen to him. When you get mad off him, make your self you don;t undertand him or you don,t hear him. and keep him reapiting his self. He will start to avoid you. But don't forget don't loose him. like him are so funy some times, if you are streesed.

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6. 51

   compromiseadviceposted 15 years ago

   LoL listen to them, but never act on what they say. If you are feeling a little feisty, call them on their rubbish!

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7. 49

   curioxatposted 15 years ago

   Try and catch them out! Ask around, build up a bit of a profile of the colleague from other colleagues - or even become friends with them (keep your enemies closer)

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