I'd like feedback on my article: Heat Stroke: All That's Hot Is Not Fever

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  1. docashp profile image76
    docashpposted 6 years ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article Heat Stroke: All That's Hot Is Not Fever. What can I do to improve? Thanks!

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    1. profile image0
      Ivan Hernandezposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      your article is good, but it needs more work. there's a lot of callouts and everything is too generic. Id say your article gets an 85/100 for effort. Also, I dont want to get a 30-day ban from posting offensive material.

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  2. Jeremy Gill profile image91
    Jeremy Gillposted 6 years ago

    This Hub is similar to your other I reviewed, and so are my ideas. Remove extra white space, insert some punctuation where needed, and most of all, find ways to make the presentation engaging.

    Unlike many Hubs that request help, you've utilized several photos, tables, and callouts, so good on you for variety. However, until the information can excite readers, most will turn away far before reaching the end.

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  3. profile image0
    pen promulgatesposted 6 years ago

    Hello Doshcap,
    Should I not tell you your article is extensive and well researched. HOWEVER, it's too technical and hard for a common man to understand. You may consider explaining everything in a simpler and more comprehensible form.

    Also, your title looks that of a magazine that has a defined audience. As HP is more about answering queries on Google. You might reconsider changing the title using the key word 'heat stroke' in a better way.
    Good luck!

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  4. psycheskinner profile image82
    psycheskinnerposted 6 years ago

    Your leading picture is under a license that requires attribution.  I suspect a lot of the other content is also being improperly used.

    I think it is fine to have a technical article if there is an audience for it, but in this case who would it be? Advanced students and professionals are going to want to use peer-reviewed literature rather than material without a clear source.

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