How should I respond to hubbers who leave me mean comments that upset me?
there is one simple step to this my friend.... politely ignore......
and if there is more difficulty, delete the comment forever... and flag the person....
I would clarify if there is a misunderstanding. Typically though, its not wise to do it. I can't stand mean-spirited people. I can usually pick them out. And I quietly avoid them or tell them they are just being mean and leave it at that. I think that's the foundation of having 'social grace'.
So far, I haven't had (thankfully) any comments of that sort.
If the comments are not constructive, just delete them and don't bother to answer them. It isn't much fun for the person leaving a nasty comment if you just delete it and ignore them.
But be sure they are not trying to help you with your hubs. Sometimes people criticize in an attempt to help - but can be painful if not worded correctly.
I believe that there is a setting that allows you to screen comments before they are posted on your Hub. This doesn't save you the pain of having to see and read them, but at least it provides a way for you to delete unwanted comments before they are publicly posted.
As long as its not critic trying to help you with your hubs, you can ignore the comment and people, you could even delete the comment before it goes public not responding to comment is what it needs to frustrate the person and he might just stop on his/her own You also should mention that he is being mean (if the comments are public like a comment to your answer) in a professional way to clarify that you are not about to argue (cause that what he/she needs) and are well known professional etiquette. Every writer or artist of any kind feels this problem you grow strong by facing them. Nice and important question
Deny, and move on. Don't fuel the fire they have going. Some people have nothing better to do, and too much time on their hands.
Your question makes me feel like crying, secondimage. It is so disheartening to hear that any hubpage participant would be abusive to another. After all, we are all in the same boat, with a love for writing. Anyone with "Best Seller" next to their name would be busy publishing their latest endeavor, with little time left for the hub. And, ironically, the best writers understand the "hit and miss" even among the professionals. It is not likely that the cream of the crop would be mean, as they know firsthand, the difficulty in becoming a highly successful author.
I believe the best defense is an eloquent offense. Disarm abusers and bullies with your charm. (I can tell from your question that you are a sensitive, kind-hearted writer, which makes you charming). Although, it is easier said than done, if you can develop a sense of "I'm O.K., You're O.K.", dismissing differences for just that, you might be able to begin a personal process that thwarts the confidence annihilating effects of abusive commenters. Try not to take it personally, secondimage, as those personalities often have a long history of abuse. Lessen their negative impact by thinking about how grateful you are that they are not part of your real life. That idea helps to make it easier to dismiss them. If you see that a bully is persistently invading your space, flag them.
Sometimes it helps to know that if a reader isn't pleased with what you offer, they normally don't return. Just like a store you visit with prices beyond your means or substandard quality merchandise leaves you feeling; do you go back? This can help you realize that the particular individual employs bullying to feel powerful. Sad agenda, but it happens.
Don't stop writing because of a few dysfunctional participants. You have the same rights and are just as important as the next guy. In fact, it is our differences that make the world an exciting, unique and always surprising place! Stay strong, secondimage.
Constructive criticism is one thing -- but there is never a good reason to be rude or mean. Their meanness is their problem, not yours. They thrive on knowing they've upset people. Don't give them any of your time or energy; they don't deserve it.
I would just ignore them...it's just not worth fretting over someone who would do such a thing!
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