I love malapropisms - those twisted words that sound like what you meant to say, but are different than the "proper" word intended. Sometimes they're said (or written) intentionally for comic effect, other times they just come out as bloopers.
One of my favorite "Brit-com" characters, famous for her malapropisms is Mrs Slocum on "Are You Being Served". I love when she haughtily declares her opinion saying,.. "And I am unanimous in that!"
What are some of your favorite malapropisms?
We must say that one of our favourites is that modesty is one of our numerous qualities.
(if we did get the meaning...)
http://www.fun-with-words.com/malapropisms.html
Also, I dont know if this counts, but in high school I had this assignemnt, where we had to correct missused words and punctuaion in insurance claims...
"I was hit by a stationary truck coming the other way"
My then three year old son, upon having trouble finding matching socks one day, decided to go ahead and wear "mix-matched" socks.
My friend's four year old daughter like to throw away the used "coffee browns"
my daughter when she was 2 or so, used to alwyas hit her "ow-bow"
After a long day at the office administering flu shots, the young, handsome, single Dr. found his conversation with a beautiful woman that evening most vaccinating.
For the religious,
"Seven days without prayer make one weak."
A South American friend of mine commented that my niece, who has earned the title of Prom Queen was a veritable "Miss Population".
One of my favorites comes from the auntie of a good friend who fractured the ice big time at an apres-ski party by loudly requesting a "Horny Wallbanger"...
For those too young to remember it, the drink was actually a Harvey Wallbanger, containing Galliano, Orange juice, Vodka, and grenadine, known to be a potent concoction, but it was, after all, an apres-ski party
Yes I remember that one. It never made me horny, but I once threw up.
My father was assembling a set of shelves and couldn't quite figure it out on his own.
He said, "Well then, I guess I'll read the constructions."
Michelangelo painting the sixteenth chapel and not the Sistine Chapel
We had been to a friend's house in Pensylvannia for the day and my daughter had spent most of it in their jacuzzi.
About 3 month's later - we were going for another visit and my daughter asked me - "Mommy, can I go in the maguzzi again - it was so much fun last time?" Too cute!
Clotted Cheese, instead of cottage cheese.
Barry Manilow's song, "Looks Like Tomatoes."
Drizzly Land instead of Disney Land.
There's a Bud Light commercial out...that asks something like "Do you have trouble putting on condiments?" (referring to Hot dogs/hamburgers)...but the camera zooms in on this one lady shaking her head at her man !
I worked with a woman from India. She knew English very very well. We were talking about another co-worker and how this person needed to always be in everyone else's business. She said very innocently "yes, she is very noisy." She meant Nosey. It was cute. I did not correct her.
"It will take time to restore chaos and order". GWB also
Hi Jen, Is that mistletoe hanging over your mug of tea?
Why, yes it is
I'm in my festive apparel.
Didn't Bush also say something about promoting an energy plan that encourages consumption?
Indeed he did, and here are his words in all their glory . .
"We need an energy bill that encourages consumption." - GWB
Regarding the mistletoe . .
your mug of tea looks somewhat forlorn . . like its waiting expectantly under the mistletoe for another mug of tea to pass by and give it a "clunk" (do mugs clunk or clink or do something entirely different when they get together)?
Ah, yes. Waiting expectantly under the mistletoe is one of my favorite holiday traditions.
But, it is a mug of coffee not tea. Coffee clunks, tea clinks. I think that is how to distinguish between them...
Happy holidays in any case
When commentating on a snooker match . .
"For those of you watching in black and white, the blue ball is the one next to the pink" - Murray Walker
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Beer.
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