I'd like feedback on my article: Airline News: Passengers Kicked Off..

1. 82

   Bills Placeposted 7 years ago

   Just updated (basically rewrote) this article with new events, etc. At the time of editing, the score was only 48. If anyone could provide feedback on how to further improve this hub, it would be greatly appreciated.
   
   Also, does anyone know if there's a niche site this would fit under?
   
   https://hubpages.com/travel/Airlines-Ki … -Incidents

   replyreport
2. 77

   Jeremy Gillposted 7 years ago

   Here are some tips:
   
   1) Correct the error in this sentence: "However, the father did not understand the request as the 2-year old has he had gotten her to sit calmly."
   2) Personally, rather than the large blue format of the subheadings (like "Reason Kicked:"), I'd simply bold them.
   3) Your last capsule is called "Questions for Readers" but there's only one question, making the plural incorrect. Add a few more, especially since single bullet points are often considered unwise.
   
   My best guess for a niche site is the travel-related WanderWisdom. Good luck.

   replyreport
   1. 82

      Bills Placeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks, I have updated based on your feedback.

      replyreport
3. 82

   Bills Placeposted 7 years ago

   Anyone else have ideas? I've updated twice since posting, still getting the auto-email "could be featured" and "may have spammy elements".
   
   The only elements I have at this point are text, and a video for each incident. I did have an image for each airline (as this will be a continuation style hub, but removed these on the last round of editing).
   
   I don't have any Amazon capsules, and no external links other than the embedded video links.

   replyreport
4. 68

   daydreamsposted 7 years ago

   There are grammar errors and your syntax is awkward in some places. I can’t see anything spammy though.

   replyreport
   1. 82

      Bills Placeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for pointing that out, I'll make time to proofread it again later and see if I can spot the grammar/syntax issues.

      replyreport
5. 89

   aesta1posted 7 years ago

   I see it is now featured so congrats.

   replyreport
   1. 82

      Bills Placeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Wow, I didn't even notice that this morning! Alright, on to the next non-featured hub!

      replyreport
   2. 82

      Bills Placeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Aesta, was just curious, how can you tell someone else's hub is featured when viewing it?

      replyreport
6. 72

   Gregory DeVictorposted 7 years ago

   You wrote:
   
   “On June 21st, 2017. . . .”
   
   I believe that it should read “On June 21, 2017. . . .”

   replyreport
   1. 82

      Bills Placeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      That's how I have been writing dates my whole life, but now you got me curious. I'll probably look into that later and find out I've been wrong all this time.

      replyreport
7. 72

   Gregory DeVictorposted 7 years ago

   You wrote:
   
   “According to the family’s attorney, Mandy Ifrah and Tamir Raanan were on a return flight home (Fort Lauderdale, Fl to New York).”
   Why not:
   “According to the family’s attorney, Mandy Ifrah and Tamir Raanan were on a return flight home from Fort Lauderdale to New York.”

   replyreport
   1. 82

      Bills Placeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Actually, not sure on this one. Would make more sense to have it that way. At the time I may have been worried it wouldn't be considered 'unique' if that is how the news article I got the information from has it. Stuck in the 'must pass Copyscape' mindset.

      replyreport
8. 72

   Gregory DeVictorposted 7 years ago

   APA Style dictates that words should be used for numbers below 10 and numerals for numbers 10 and above. Here is the exception: For units of measurement and statistical expressions, numerals can be used. For example, it is Grade 1 and not Grade One.
   
   You wrote:
   
   “In March 2018 a father and his 2-year old daughter. . . .”
   
   The sentence should read:
   
   “In March, 2018 a father and his two-year old daughter. . . .”
   
   Please note that I inserted a comma between March and 2018.
   
   Check out this link for further clarification:
   
   http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/numbe … trication/

   replyreport
   1. 82

      Bills Placeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for pointing this out, this further confirms my theory above that I had been writing with the 'Copyscape mindset'. I suppose I will need to pay closer attention when revising my older hubs. Thanks again.

      replyreport
   2. 73

      Marie Flintposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      two-year-old (hyphens used to join related group words functioning as an adjective)

      replyreport
9. 72

   Gregory DeVictorposted 7 years ago

   Bill, I understand what you mean about the Copyscape issue. I use them too when writing hubs and things get confusing from time to time.

   replyreport
10. 72

    Gregory DeVictorposted 7 years ago

    Bill, you might want to check out these two links.
    
    This link is about writing numbers in APA style:
    
    http://dne2.ucsf.edu/public/comp/20150225-apaf.pdf
    
    This link is about writing dates in APA format:
    
    http://libanswers.walsh.edu/faq/148003
    
    I hope this helps.

    replyreport