Hi Hubbers,
I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
Here is my article: Bruce Jenner Sex Change Defies Logic
Where is the value of this as an article? What will a reader learn from it? I think you need to pick a topic that is more than just you expressing an opinion on some old news.
This is really old news. He's not considering sex reassignment surgery - he's already had sex reassignment surgery about a year and a half ago and was living as a woman for over two years before that. She is not just living as a woman currently but is a woman.
I'm not sure what the purpose of the article is exactly. You start by saying he's going to give an interview which will be a big reveal - this interview happened several years ago. Then you say he's considering a sex change operation which as stated already happened.
You go on to say he actually had a sex change operation (though you've got the dates wrong - It was February I think of 2015). Then you back up again and it seems as if you are investigating whether or not he might have started living as a woman (long hair) or some kind of treatment to make himself look more feminine (full lips). You mention a recent photo but it's Jan. 27, 2015. You then jump back again to January 9, 2015 then up again to Jan. 28, 2015 which you refer to as just a few days ago.
The part with your opinion mentions how you abhor what he's done so far and what he plans on doing. It's obvious this article was written several years ago and reflects a point in time that is long past and can obviously be dated as such.
It is unclear what the purpose of the table is as until the last row it doesn't seem in any way related to him becoming a woman and that row doesn't add anything to the article.
Of all the nice pictures there are you chose a really unattractive one which seems purposeful.
You also need to be careful about mixing up diagnostic categories - at one point you wonder if Jenner could have Autogynephilia. This is Transvestic Disorder which is something completely different from Gender Dysphoric Disorder - in one case one one is sexually aroused by cross dressing which is accompanied by being aroused by thoughts of oneself as the opposite gender. In the other case the person is experiencing distress because they believe they have been born in the wrong body. Autogynephilia is also not a fetish which is becoming aroused from the use of nonliving objects or specific focus on nongenital body parts in fantasies and sexual behaviors. In fact, fetishes cannot be diagnosed if limited to items of clothing or cross dressing.
Don't misinterpret my point here - I think you are fully justified in having an opinion about this where you can't understand such a thing and are against it. But I think even if you managed to get this in shape where there wasn't the jumping about in time, doesn't talk about it as if it reflects recent events when they are years old instead being more a reflection of how you felt when you learned what he was going to do and then after he did it, you should think twice about posting it. I'm all for everyone being able to have their own opinions about things and believe diverse opinions make life interesting and helps us think about things from differing view points that help us form more well-reasoned beliefs and points of view.
But that being said I think we have a responsibility to be careful about presenting our opinions on a public platform that reaches a lot of people, when that opinion can be hurtful to individuals, their friends and families. There are about a million and a half transgendered people in the U.S. alone and that is likely an underestimate as some who haven't gotten to the point of admitting it to anyone won't likely be willing to report it. Add to that those from other places as well as all their friends, colleagues, and family members and that's a lot of people who might be hurt by such an article.
Just my honest take on it - I don't mean to be critical or judgmental.
From a purely objective point of view - remember HP requires that articles are family friendly and this one is probably pushing the boundary on that one so even in good shape I'm not sure it would be accepted.
Feel free to pm if you want to discuss further or want clarification about something I said.
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