I'd like feedback on my article: Why Bottled Water is Bad for Your Health

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  1. Nyamweya profile image60
    Nyamweyaposted 5 weeks ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
    Here is my article: Why Bottled Water is Bad for Your Health

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    1. theraggededge profile image88
      theraggededgeposted 5 weeks agoin reply to this

      Two things...

      Make sure the image has a proper license for commercial use and focus more on the title.

      You haven't gone into detail about why it is bad for your health in comparison to tap water. For example, in some regions of the UK, fluoride is added to tap water and chlorine is added to all our tap water. So what detrimental effects do those have on health? What organs might they affect? What long-term problems might arise?

      Do the same for bottled water. You mention bromate and asbestos but not how they affect human health.

      More research required smile

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    2. WriterJanis profile image91
      WriterJanisposted 5 weeks agoin reply to this

      Hi Silas!
      I see you only have one image in your article and it isn't properly credited. Be sure you use an image that has the right license and credit it. It's also better to use more than one image.
      Your paragraphs are very long, way too long for people who read articles on their cell phones. I would break these up into smaller paragraphs and also add more titles.
      You state many things as fact. I suggest you add recourses that people can check. Good luck!

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      1. Nyamweya profile image60
        Nyamweyaposted 5 weeks agoin reply to this

        Alright, this is well noted, thank you

        replyreport
  2. Eric Caunca profile image100
    Eric Cauncaposted 5 weeks ago

    In addtion to what Bev said, it seems you're missing reliable sources to support the claims in your articles. You should also include recommendation or suggestions so people reduce or stop the buying of bottled drinks. For example, instead of buying bottled water, why not suggest bringing their own tumbles or any reusable water container, and installing more drinking water fountains in various locations. They reduces the bottled water environmental impacts and they can save money as well.

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    1. Nyamweya profile image60
      Nyamweyaposted 5 weeks agoin reply to this

      Thank you for this insightful advice

      replyreport
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