How do you define "handsome" or "beautiful?"

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   savvydatingposted 8 years ago

   How do you define "handsome" or "beautiful?"
   
   For example, I have had people tell me that someone is handsome and I look at them and think, "Huh?" They look very nice, sort of...but handsome? I don't think so. Apparently, beauty really is in the eye of the beholder? In my mind, top model is beautiful and the rest are nice looking or not as much. How about you? And yes, I fully realize that beauty is only skin deep. But technically, what is handsome or beautiful to you?
   
   

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   Old Poolmanposted 8 years ago

   I would assume you are talking about outside appearance only.  I know lots of people who are not physically that appealing but are truly beautiful people inside.
   
   I think the reference to beautiful or handsome falls into eye appeal only.  Their appearance follows the rules of nature where our eye likes things that are perfectly symmetrical and balanced.  They have perfect hair, teeth, and are perfectly proportioned for their height and weight.
   
   That doesn't mean they are good or kind people.

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Hello Old Poolman.....I was referring to outside appearance only, and I agree with you about the other. The question came up in my mind, recently, because a mom said her sons are really handsome. I didn't say so, but they are not!! Thus, I wonder...

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      Old Poolmanposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Kind of like people bragging about their newborn baby being beautiful.  I guess beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

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   manatita44posted 8 years ago

   I always say that dictionaries generally give us guidelines, and sometimes good ones too, but of more importance is the Spirit as well as the context in which the word or words are used.
   
   I think it's fair to say that 'fear' is generally accepted as relating to that which makes us uncomfortable, like a man or woman stalking us, or death, or the unknown and possibly even change, for some. Again this same 'fear' is regarded as positive, meaning reverential awe of fear of God. I have put this on Q's and A's and the support for this last approach is not so great.
   
   My perception here is that 'handsome' generally relates to men and 'beauty' to women or things aesthetic, ethereal, esoteric ....
   The rose is a classic symbol. Beauty is softer, sweeter like honey, visual like the snowflakes falling on a winters morn or golden rain, dropping from the clouds.
   
   It is like the zephyrs or light winds meandering through the meadows and kissing the sunflowers as they go by. Beauty is charm and elegance; it is in poise and charisma as well as stateliness, and yes, in the designs that models wear.
   
   Much of the time, what we see as beauty is the temporary state: The make-up, the glamour, the pattern or design; the catwalk motion...
   Yes, beauty is in motion, like the waves lashing against the tides, or the sun setting on the horizon; it is the quality within the spiritual Heart which immediately manifests in the eyes ... the smiles...
   
   It is in enchantment, allurement, wonder and marvel of the Catskill Mountains...the Taj Mahal and other unique aspects of natures grandeur; yet again it is in the sweet simplicity of the child's pranks.
   
   I guess that I have used it so much here, that it is obvious that it outweighs the other word 'handsome.' God Itself or Love, if you like, is the supreme Beauty. Much Love, savvydating.

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Manatita,
      No question that physical beauty is temporary and spiritual beauty is forever. Your prose and symbolism is very nice.

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   Dont Taze Me Broposted 8 years ago

   
   
   To me handsome and beautiful are definitely, and solely in the eye of the beholder. because what these terms are doing is trying to subjectively define the amount of attractiveness in a person's looks without an objective definition so in any person's mind  perceived inner beauty can be conflated with the perceived outer beauty, thus the love of a mother for the inner beauty that all babies have innate in the beauty of their innocence may be perceived as making them handsome or beautiful, and the same goes for adults.
   
   To me, from my life experiences, it is impossible to separate the inner from the outer beauty and I can not assess the latter one without knowing the former. You can understand this if you have ever known someone whom you thought was attractive only to find that once you got to know how ugly they were inside their appearance actually repulsed you. Once that happens no one appears attractive, handsome or beautiful until you know them well and you realize looks can be a deception and usually are only skin deep!
   
   In my life I have dated and gotten to know what the world would consider some of the most beautiful looking women around (real foxes) and none of them held a candle to the beauty I found within my wife whose "looks" would not hold a candle to theirs, but melts my heart every time I look at her,
   
   even though she threatens to taze me every time I do. (read  my profile

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Your love for your wife is inspiring, Taze. Indeed, I agree that it is impossible to separate inner beauty and outer beauty. Your answer describes the character of a "beautiful" man.

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      Dont Taze Me Broposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      That's one compliment I have never gotten on hub pages! Actually that's the only compliment I've gotten on hub pages besides I'm too funny!:)Of course it's as hard to get compliments as it is to see beauty in people not knowing them.

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   fpherj48posted 8 years ago

   Yves....To begin with, you are certainly a woman I would describe as "beautiful."  Since I saw the picture of your son, It's clear the apple does not fall far from the tree!  This aside.....
   I tend to use the word "beautiful" for both men & women. Rarely do I say a man is "handsome," unless he's quite up in years & "well-preserved" (if you know what I mean)  As we age, we can better appreciate certain degrees of beauty in physical appearance.
   As for "inner beauty," we can gauge this only if we actually know the person.  Since your question refers to how we literally "see" a man or woman in the physical sense, it's easier to answer.
   IMHO, can a parent answer such a question objectively?  LOL  Highly unlikely.  Especially to a Mother....aren't our children the most BEAUTIFUL in the world?  LOL  and of course Grandchildren too!
   In my own way of observing people, I find that the automatic "Second glance," alerts me to the fact that I obviously see "beauty" in someone.
   It is more often than not, the total picture.  A man or woman with a beautiful face is more than halfway through the picture.  Then I believe quite a few other attributes add to the attraction.  A person in good shape who exudes the image of health, as in lovely complexion, bright smile, shiny, well-groomed hair, will always increase the beauty of an individual.
   I feel the words I use to define beauty, is to describe what I SEE.   This is a great question that I don't think has been asked before!  Paula

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      What a lovely compliment, Paula. Thank you!!  You are so right---it is that "second glance" that "alerts" us. I appreciate that you brought up healthy living. It makes all the difference. Honestly, I hate exercise. Guess it's time to change that. Lol

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   threekeysposted 8 years ago

   Hi savvydating!
   
   For me beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
   
   Men to me can both be "beautiful or handsome" to me just as a female can be "beautiful or handsome" as well.
   
   There is the situation where a person is physically beautiful because they express the set measurements  of what scientists/artists see as beautiful in the "symmetry" of it all.
   
   Then somehow you glimpse the inner beauty of someone and it enhances their physical beauty even though that person may not be classed as "beautiful" by some.
   
   And yes all mothers tend to see their babies, their children as beautiful or handsome. Let them! 
   
   Yes, for me beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Three Keys....So many wonderful answers, including yours, which express the value of inner beauty. Perfect symmetry is icing on the cake. Thank you for sharing! I appreciate it.

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   Ayaz Behraniposted 8 years ago

   i define in my own word like i am Handsome and you are not beautiful so its like not suitable for you but i am very happy....

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Lol. Not the most flattering thing anyone has ever said to me. I'll chalk this up to "a generalization." Ha! But seriously, just make sure your dates don't know how you feel about your "happiness," Ayaz, and nobody will get hurt.

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   Diana Abrahamsonposted 8 years ago

   
   
   Beauty as they say so well,  is in the eye of the beholder. People look at life and beauty through different eyes. Some more earthy and others through more spiritual eyes.
   God looks at us through the eyes of great love and appreciation.

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      That's lovely, Diana. Thank you for giving us a spiritual perspective.

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   Laurinzo Scottposted 8 years ago

   Savvy I think it all has to do with perception and how your perceptions are controlled by social factors; such as, what do your peers find attractive, or your society in general... for me it is often about how that person perceives themselves... can spiritually affect the way others see them... often too for those who seek more enlightenment it is something that has to exude from within(although I didn't always think that)
   
   A lot of it has to do with the symmetry of one's face which psychologists and anthropologists say goes way back in our dna...  personally I think someone like yourself is beautiful because you are physically so, and it seems that your spirit matches that

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Yes. Our lives are enhanced when we recognize and appreciate the beautiful spiritual essence within an individual. That is true beauty. Also, thank you for the compliment, Laurinzo. So kind of you.

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      Laurinzo Scottposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      You are welcome savvy, and I appreciate the stimulating topical discussions you create

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