One of my favorites...What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.
Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One turns to the other and says, “Does this taste funny to you?”
Seismologists have just discovered a previously unknown fault line running under Washington DC.
Representative Ocasio-Cortez immediately introduced legislation to name it Trump's fault.
Here's a couple:
What do bureaucrats use to wrap their presents?
A lot of red tape.
You know how cold it was the other day?
It was so cold, the politicians were putting their hands in their OWN pockets!
Have you heard about McDonald's new Democrat's value meal?
Order anything on the menu and the person behind you in line has to pay for it.
What does a nosy pepper do?
It gets jalapeno business.
Had a dream about a muffler all night.
Woke up exhausted.
A lady is giving a party for her granddaughter, and has gone all out with a caterer, a band and even a clown. Just before the party starts, two guys show up looking for a handout. Feeling sorry for them, the woman tells them that they can get a meal if they will chop some firewood. Gratefully, they head to the rear of the house.
Guests arrive, and all is going well with the children having a wonderful time. But the clown suddenly calls to report that he is stuck in traffic, and will probably not make the party at all. The woman is very disappointed and unsuccessfully tries to entertain the children herself.
She happens to look out the window and sees one of the guys doing cartwheels across the lawn. She watches in awe as he swings from tree branches, does midair flips, and leaps high in the air. She calls the other guy over and says: “What your friend is doing is absolutely marvellous. I have never seen such a thing. Do you think your friend would consider repeating this performance for the children at the party? I would pay him $50!”
“Well,” he responds, “I dunno… Let me ask him.” He turns around and yells at his friend: “Hey Willie! For $50 would you chop off another toe?!”
by nikki1 12 months ago
And, how do you prep them?
by Deb Hirt 5 years ago
What is your favorite brand of coffee?Out of the test challenges, what have you determined to be your favorite brew and why?
by Violet 3 years ago
What is one movie you would recommend? Why? Preferably your all time favorite.I'd like to know if I've seen these movies, and if I haven't, maybe you can convince me to see it (and probably review).
by Jenn 7 years ago
What is your favorite alcoholic drink?
by HubPages 10 years ago
How to eat fried worms
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