What is your favorite joke? I think it would be fun...Preferably clean

1. 80

   Mark O Richardsonposted 5 years ago

   One of my favorites...What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.

   replyreport
2. 60

   FatFreddysCatposted 5 years ago

   Q: What do vegan zombies eat?
   
   A: Graaaaaiiiiins!

   replyreport
3. 76

   Castlepalomaposted 5 years ago

   Two cannibals are eating a clown.
   
   One turns to the other and says, “Does this taste funny to you?”

   replyreport
   1. 80

      Mark O Richardsonposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Good one! I like that one too.

      replyreport
4. 71

   Live to Learnposted 5 years ago

   Seismologists have just discovered a previously unknown fault line running under Washington DC.
   
   Representative Ocasio-Cortez immediately introduced legislation to name it Trump's fault.

   replyreport
   1. 83

      GA Andersonposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      "I don't care who you are, that there's funny."
      
      GA

      replyreport
5. 80

   Mark O Richardsonposted 5 years ago

   Here's a couple:
   What do bureaucrats use to wrap their presents?
   A lot of red tape.
   
   You know how cold it was the other day?
   It was so cold, the politicians were putting their hands in their OWN pockets!

   replyreport
6. 71

   Live to Learnposted 5 years ago

   Have you heard about McDonald's new Democrat's value meal?
   
   Order anything on the menu and the person behind you in line has to pay for it.

   replyreport
   1. 80

      Mark O Richardsonposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Good one

      replyreport
7. 80

   Mark O Richardsonposted 5 years ago

   What does a nosy pepper do?
   It gets jalapeno business.

   replyreport
8. 76

   Castlepalomaposted 5 years ago

   Had a dream about a muffler all night.
   
   Woke up exhausted.

   replyreport
9. 80

   Mark O Richardsonposted 5 years ago

   A lady is giving a party for her granddaughter, and has gone all out with a caterer, a band and even a clown. Just before the party starts, two guys show up looking for a handout. Feeling sorry for them, the woman tells them that they can get a meal if they will chop some firewood. Gratefully, they head to the rear of the house.
   
   Guests arrive, and all is going well with the children having a wonderful time. But the clown suddenly calls to report that he is stuck in traffic, and will probably not make the party at all. The woman is very disappointed and unsuccessfully tries to entertain the children herself.
   
   She happens to look out the window and sees one of the guys doing cartwheels across the lawn. She watches in awe as he swings from tree branches, does midair flips, and leaps high in the air. She calls the other guy over and says: “What your friend is doing is absolutely marvellous. I have never seen such a thing. Do you think your friend would consider repeating this performance for the children at the party? I would pay him $50!”
   
   
   “Well,” he responds, “I dunno… Let me ask him.” He turns around and yells at his friend: “Hey Willie! For $50 would you chop off another toe?!”

   replyreport