Is okay for a 16yr girl to be taking care of her 3 younger siblings while her si

1. 49

   andawposted 15 years ago

   Is okay for a 16yr girl to be taking care of her 3 younger siblings while her single mother...
   
   parties all night. This mother who is my girlfriend makes her 16 yr daughter take care of the 3younger siblings 8,9,10 yrs old, while she goes out to night clubs until later hours.
   The person whom she parties with is her boss at work a female who leaves her 15yr old son at home alone as well. My girlfriend would not discuss the matter with me she becomes very aggressive and to out anyway even though I tell not to do so.
   Is she being neglectful or am i on the wrong path about  parenting and responsibilities.

   replyreport
2. 82

   angela_michelleposted 15 years ago

   Is it okay, well yes. Is it responsible parenting, no. I think there are a lot of parents who have their 16 year old daughter/son watch the kids while they do what not. Granted it's her choice of where she goes, and how late she stays out that you seem to have a problem with. I used to babysit until 2:00 in the morning for people when I was 16. They would let me sleep and make a bed on the couch, until they got home. Do I think a mother of four should be going to night clubs, honestly, I think there is an age when you need to grow out of that lifestyle, but is it wrong, no. Just immature. Not neglectful. The kids are being cared for.

   replyreport
3. 64

   manic mondayposted 15 years ago

   I think it depends on a few things: Are the kids going to bed on time to wake up for school? Are their grades suffering? Are they eating dinner every night? Is her daughter feeling burdened and forced to watch them, or is she doing this willingly? As for the 15 yr old son, he is old enough to watch himself. I think your biggest issue is the fact that she is partying so frequently, and so late. If you suspect cheating is going on, then maybe it is time to find a new girlfriend!!!

   replyreport
4. 56

   SpaceAgeposted 15 years ago

   this don't sound right. i'd anonymously call cps

   replyreport
   1. 87

      gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I would call cps for this action is tantamount to child abuse.   This poor soul is a parentified child.    If the mother cannot be a mother then SHE should have either used contraception and/or keep her legs closed.   Mom's call!

      replyreport
5. 53

   inc999posted 15 years ago

   from your description I think the 16 yrs dauther is more responsible than her mother. A mother who left her kids for parties with her boss all night will not make a big difference either if she is home.

   replyreport
6. 61

   Chaice27posted 15 years ago

   First is it a daily thing or once or twice a month? 16 and 15 are appropriate ages to babysit. Remember just because she is a parent doens't mean she has no right to a life of her own. That said no person is the same as another and that goes for families and relationships as well.
   I feel that if it's everyday and the relationship between mother and child is suffering than it's up to the parent to do what's needed for the children. However, if not than you need to butt out. Your are not your girlfriend's parent or a parent to her children so take your nosey self out of the picture.
   I have my own parental style as should every other parent out there and just because mine may not be the same as your girlfriend's doesn't mean that I, or anyone else, should interfere.

   replyreport
7. 0

   AliceOnAThreadposted 14 years ago

   It's ok for the mother to do it as a once a month girls night out to maybe a restaurant but what kind of example is she setting to her 16 year old by going out to night clubs and coming home in the wee hours of the morning. Her 16 year old is now old enough to know what her mother is doing and personally I feel this is detrimental behavior. I have a 4 year old and I'm 25 this year my resolution is no more clubbing. My girls night out will be more restaurant focused or in my house because I want to break out of the hang out routine before he is in school. I hope her behavior doesn't rub off on her daughter. She'll be singing a sorry tune when her daughter is a mother and doing that to her grandchildren.

   replyreport
8. 72

   mindyjgirlposted 13 years ago

   You could call csd and cps on your friend, but I doubt they would do anything about it. Personally if she is my girlfreind,I wouldn't call on her, I would tell her to start saving her money for all he kids clothes and tell her to get her chit together. The sad thing is she's just teaching them how to be alcoholic loosers. My friends know i would watch their kids if they wanted to go out. But if its all the time then she needs help, and calling a counselor for advise is a first step in getting help for you and her, you can help her when you know how to help. Best of Luck to you all.

   replyreport