My 18 months son is very possessive oh his mom

1. 52

   aroidsposted 15 years ago

   My son would grab stuff to throw at me if I hug his mom or even sit near her. I just taught him to kick a soccer ball and swing a baseball bat last week, now this week if I go near his mom he comes and kicks me...if that doesn't work then he goes look for his baseball bat.
   
   Has anybody have this type of behavior with their son?

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2. 66

   Lisa HWposted 15 years ago

   I haven't experienced with either of my sons (or daughter), but I'm wondering if you're misinterpreting what's going on.  If you've been teaching him to throw (etc) he has probably enjoyed your attention, and he could be thinking, "So, this is what we do together."   If you're sitting near his mother it may not be so much that he's possessive of her.  Instead, it may be that he wants your attention.   There's a chance he's throwing stuff at you to try to engage you in the activities you've been teaching him recently.
   
   I hope you see my attempt at humor when I say, "This is why you shouldn't teach an eighteen-month-old how to throw and kick."       In all seriousness, though, he's a little young to really be able to sort out the concept of when throwing and kicking are "good" and when they aren't appropriate.  I kind of think he's just trying to engage you in the play he has probably enjoyed (because he's had your attention).  One way to test that theory would be to start showing him some other kind of play (in which he gets your undivided attention - like blocks, story-reading, making a couple of stuffed animals "talk", anything).  Do that for a couple of days and see if brings them to you when you're near his mother.

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3. 83

   kerrygposted 15 years ago

   My daughter was very possessive of me at that age too. I don't think it's uncommon, especially if your wife is the primary caregiver and/or breastfed him for a long time.
   
   At 2 1/2, she still is possessive (we call her the little chaperone because of the way she'll squeeze her way between us if we're sitting together) but much less so, and I think it's because my husband started spending a lot more time with her one on one.
   
   Also do your best not to encourage your son's possessiveness on the grounds of being "cute." We slip up and laugh sometimes, but generally we try to make it clear that Mommy has plenty of love for everybody and right now it's Daddy's turn.

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   1. 52

      aroidsposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      he's really sweet to me when his momther isn't around. When she's around he get jelous and violent.
      
      I don't think its cute even though everybody else does. It's good to see that my kid isn't the only kid out there with this "type" of behavior.

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4. 0

   Will Apseposted 15 years ago

   I've seen this with friend's kids. Also, my mother told me I wanted to marry her when I was a toddler. I think it is pretty universal. It also suggests your son is confident enough to say what he feels- always a good sign. I've seen daughters behave in a similar way with fathers too. Freud wasn't completely mad you know. There is always rivalry for love and attention in a family.

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5. 0

   rajalakshmyposted 15 years ago

   It is very normal for boys to be possessive towards their mother.

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