What turns an innocent child into a bully?
Do you think there is an educational, environmental factor in it or a genetical one? How about society, what's its role into this matter? Any ways you would find useful in dealing with the phenomenon?
from being bullied or just plain ole fear, may not even be that tough after all. Just putting up a front so they wont experience what they fear. Real bad kids as well as people usually aren't bullies. There is no need for them to be they would rather stay in the cut and strike when threatened.
The people around them. Bad adults, bad kids. Kids learn to be bullies around age 2 when parents give in to their every tantrum. They learn they can get what they want by being loud and aggressive and having no empathy for others.
One factor parents have no control over is how a child is treated socially by his/her peers. Those who are not welcomed into "the in crowd" basically have 3 options.
1. Hang out with other kids (in their same league)
2. Live a solitary life with no friends.
3. Become a bully hanging out with other bullies demanding respect/fear from all the other kids.
Some kids get raised to hero status after beating up or defending themself from a bully. Now he/she is the new "king of the hill". It's very easy for them to get swallowed up into a power trip after that.
Since we have no control over other kids and what goes on in their household all a parent can do is make sure they have a close and tight bond with their children. The kids have to know they can talk to you about anything without you automatically getting upset. Most kids who are bullied never tell their parents. It's not until after there are obvious signs.
Parents have to assume the responsibility for their child's welfare. Telling a kid to "work it out on his own" or simply saying, "fight back" is not always the answer.
For those parents who have children that are bullies probably the best thing you can do when they are young is show them where most bullies end up. (In prison or in the grave).
I think bullies bully because the are afraid, and in most cases I bet they have been bullied by someone in their life!
I think a lot of children and teenagers become bullies due to some kind of insecurity. It doesn't always have to do with people they hang around with, but in some cases it does. Depends on their surroundings too, what they grow up with and learn from.
Some children became bullys because they have witnessed violence in the home at a young age.
That is very difficult to ascertain but I suspect it is rooted in the home life to a degree. There are many forms of bullying and a child could easily witness them. For example, a wife may be mentally abused by her husband in the witness of the child. This then leads to a thinking on the child's part that he should treat women in the same manner. We all have a lot of learned behaviors about relationships which we pickup from our home life as we grow up. I certainly believe that we live in a society today which contributes much more in that direction with behavior which elicits road rage and then a response to that rage as if we are the victim. That carries over into many other areas indicating that we are fast becoming a society that has forgotten the Golden Rule and all the manners that mama wanted us to have. Many now among us believe they are better and more deserving that others so they feel perfectly justified in cutting in line and taking more than their share. Children drink it this behavior and soon exhibit it in some form themselves. WB
I say it all starts at home, with proper parenting. Love your kids! Pay attention to them. Don't be afraid to disipline them. Talk with them, eat with them. But, just love them. I really think it is that simple.
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