What was the most difficult thing you experienced after having your first child?
Getting along as a couple.
I changed quite dramatically after my 1st child was born, but my husband didn't. It was quite challenging and the marriage didn't make it, but the 2 kids we had are amazing!
Dealing with a lot of people who suddenly appeared out of the woodwork thinking that they had a bigger claim than anyone else on me, my baby and our time. Certain members of the family visiting every single day for hours on end for the first few months - drove me almost to insanity. Conversely, one of my proudest moments was when I did not flip out at those people, but managed instead to diplomatically ask them to give us a little space!
We were fortunate as our first child did not give us any problem.
Imagine that after the last feed of milk around 9 pm, our baby woke up in the morning after 10 am to have the first milk feed.
Indeed that was the best we can ever ask for with our first baby.
Understanding..........that " summer", or "life tomorrow"...........was NOT about me..............
I, alone,.............yes, me, alone..........
made the decisions for this little baby girl's tomorrows
I, yes , me , "I" was responsible .................
So, very, sorry, dear darling daughter.............so VERY sorry........I was not prepared or ready........
I, stand before you...........disgraced.
Finding some time to be alone. It is important to retain a bit of self when you have children and it was hard. My husband worked long hours and sometimes when he came home, I felt so relieved to get some time to just take a walk by myself or a shower by myself. I felt guilty also for wanting to be alone once in a while. I did adjust eventually but it was hard. I was used to getting some time alone once in a while.
I remember being challenged to hold an adult conversation after spending my days with an infant. Thankfully, that subsided.
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