How can someone leave church and start his/her own life away from it if you live in a small town?
I am currently experiencing that same situation as what you have presented in your article, I think I can be more closer to God if I will pray alone and speak to Him privately, in my 4 years of being a convert I don't feel like I am growing spiritually, in church I feel like everyone is required to be perfect and I feel I am not. I just want to lead a normal life and serve God and be a good person in the best way I can without feeling guilty everyday. And to add on this, I am really an introvert, will God blame me for being like this? oh too sad that i've got no one here to speak about this.
You should look into buddhism, a lot of the philosophies behind it complements all religions well; then, taken to account your an introvert, meditation would probably feel natural. Buddhism's all about a concentrated self awareness so a lot of it is seclusive/contemplative.
and i just can't tell if that last question is sarcastic, if not, absolutely NO he would not blame you; lots of people are introverts, but i assume you're a pretty extreme introvert, either way your good.
DO leave the church. Let the Holy Spirit lead you, He will lead you into ALL truth. There is no scripture for a pastor or a typical church, all it says is do not forsake the gathering together. but where two or more are gathered together is true church. God may want you alone for a while and that IS OK. Dont let religious people put their usual guilt trip on you. If you are baptized in the Holy Spirit you have what you need to understand scripture. If not do so at once. Get together with like minded people when you can. Be open to the Holy Spirit, He may be leading you toward a home church.
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