Should you avoid telling someone the truth about their behavior to avoid hurting

1. 94

   Readmikenowposted 8 years ago

   Should you avoid telling someone the truth about their behavior to avoid hurting their feelings?
   
   Would it be better to just avoid confrontation and accept their behavior?

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2. 59

   Wissam Qawasmehposted 8 years ago

   The right thing to do is telling him the truth about his behavior in order to change or improve it ... But unfortunately, he will think that you're judging him, and maybe get mad at you whatever your intention. Everyone feels he do the right thing and think "Are you better than me to tell me what to do!" thats human nature
   avoid telling him the truth is not a good option, because he/she will keep hurting you or others
   So the point here is choosing the right way and time to tell them the truth ... for example tell him the truth when he's happy or in a good mood. and don't tell him directly, and the most important thing, as i see, is not making the process emotional. i mean don't be much serious .. like, start with " you're good at XXX but it's better if you're XXX" while you are smiling to let him feel IT'S NOT a BIG DEAL

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3. 59

   Sophie Aliceposted 8 years ago

   I agree with Wissam, you should always talk it out with them, otherwise you'll end up unhappy. Bottling feelings and accepting behavior you're not happy with can only make the situation worse.

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4. 81

   dashingscorpioposted 8 years ago

   It depends on how much time you expect to be spending with them.
   Not everyone is worth the investment of time and energy to point out their perceived flaws according as per our opinion.
   On the other hand if someone is musing over the reasons why people react to them a certain way or are confounded by their lack of friendships then it's fine to explain why you think it is. Oftentimes the way a message is conveyed is what hurts one's feelings.

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5. 61

   Michael-Milecposted 8 years ago

   When "someone" we are acquainted with, interacting on regular basis at the same level of interests  socially, morally, highly reputable events, and "their" behavior noticeable changes becoming unacceptable, my first reaction would be ignoring them to the point they will ask "why" are you doing this to me? Then, with additional questions pointing to their behavior, not in spirit of jugging, I would bid a help if they want improvement , since the people often want to  continue in their 'changed' behavior, blaming others  for it.

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6. 81

   pstraubie48posted 8 years ago

   It really depends ...if their behavior is such that it is offensive to others, yes, I would say but do so in a way that assures the person you are not judging but just asking him/her to assess why they do such and such.
   If however it is something that is just annoying to you, but that others have accepted as 'just a part of who he/she is', then let it go.
   I would be prepared to have this relationship severed if the person does not like it that you told them.
   Sometimes people are in the 'don't know' zone. They do not realize that what they do or say is something that rankles others or in some cases they simply do not care.

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7. 83

   peachpurpleposted 8 years ago

   yeah, I avoid to do so. I have a couple of my ex classmates who are sensitive to words, so I refrain from telling them the truth as it hurts them

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8. 82

   liesl5858posted 8 years ago

   I think the best thing to do is to tell the truth about someone with their behaviour rather than keep silent. Obviously, if you care about the person then she or he might get hurt or upset but maybe later on when he or she realise her mistakes then you are there for her or him to thank for, for pointing out what she or he had done wrong.
   It is not nice to just accept someone's wrong behaviour because in the end you will be the one who suffers and that person thinks he or she got away with it.

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9. 60

   themiddlechildposted 8 years ago

   No. I believe there are diplomatic ways of telling people, regardless of the situation, that their behavior is negatively impacting others and perhaps themselves too. I think it's always best to be honest & sincere in approach as they may also be unaware of the behavior: They might believe they are getting away with bad behavior simply because they are under the presumption no one has noticed.

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