Ever felt used by your friend?????

1. 60

   izzy_gigglesposted 14 years ago

   Ok, so co-worker/friend calls me, asking me to let him borrow $500 and supposedly he would give me the money back next week, I seriously do not know what to tell him....I feel so bad because his my friend, but I really dont trust him with that kind of money, he already owes me money....So I dont know what to tell him

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   1. 59

      Pr0metheusposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Tell him this
      
      
      "No"

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   2. 0

      Poppa Bluesposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Never do business with frineds. If you are going to lend him money put the terms in writing so you can sue him in small claims court if he stiffs you. Caution, even a win in small claims court will not guarantee you will get your money, but at least you'll have something in writing and you'll be able to receive a judgement.
      
      By the way, your instinct is almost never wrong. Trust your feelings!

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   3. 61

      Jane@CMposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      NO!

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   4. 53

      jennie quillenposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      you tell him no! surely he cant need it for that important of a reason? you cant let your 'friend' treat you like that! $500 is a lot and you cannot be expected to hand it over just like that. ask him what he needs that kind of money for so suddenly anyway,
      but something else you need to ask yourself is,
      is he really THAT good your friend? how can you be good friends with someone you dont trust? and if your not that close friends, then there is no way he can expect you just to hand over money like that. if i were you i tell him you simply just cant hand over that.
          good luck!

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   5. 61

      ediggityposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      If you know you are going to cave, because you just cant say no, get some collateral.  Or, if he really needs the money, and you have it, just give it to him and be done.

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   6. 59

      Ushamaniposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      "Never borrow never lend if you wanna keep a friend."This is the ultimate truth and you follow this to avoid headaches and heartaches in the future

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   7. 49

      Chicago773posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      yeah i have felt used b4 the shit hurtz

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   8. 59

      travisboyhottieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I FEEL EVERYONE USES EACH OTHER  TO MAKE THIS SO CALLED LIFE BE IN QUOTE " FRIENDLY" BUT IF SOMEONE YOU CONSIDER YOUR FRIEND NEEDSYOUR HELP YOU SHOULD BE ALL THAT FRIEND IS AND TOUGH LOVE TO SWEAT CARING FOR THEM.

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   9. 0

      cosetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      neither a borrower nor a lender be.
      
      trite-sounding, i know, but it is good advice. many a personal relationship has been strained, or ruined, by lending people money, or even things. which is why i don't do it and everyone who knows me pretty much knows i am like that, so they don't even ask anymore. i have given relatives a lot of money in the past and they never paid me back and it hurt or ruined our relationships.
      
      just say 'gosh, i feel bad but you know i don't lend people money because it just causes too much of a strain on friendships. but i will always be here if you need a shoulder to cry on' or something like that.

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   10. 60

       Putz Ballardposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Sounds to me like you handled this one perfectly.

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   11. 70

       Cagsilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       You must do what you feel is necessary for yourself and leave him to do the same. If he needs to borrow money, then it is obvious- he is already irresponsible with the money he makes.
       
       So, that should give you a clear idea about whether or not, you are going to get your money back.
       
       The REASON he gives you shouldn't good enough to break your understanding of his irresponsible actions with money.
       
       So, I leave you with that. Hope I helped.

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2. 79

   Uninvited Writerposted 14 years ago

   Don't lend money to friends or co-workers

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3. 0

   poetlorraineposted 14 years ago

   lend money to friends...... end of friendship

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4. 60

   izzy_gigglesposted 14 years ago

   I feel so horrible, his going to come in at 3:30 and I know his going to be bugging me about the money, I guess I'll just have to ignore him

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   1. 59

      Pr0metheusposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      If he bugs you tell him to leave you alone.  If he won't stop, tell your boss.  Harassment is no joke.

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5. 92

   akirchnerposted 14 years ago

   I make it a policy never to lend money to friends or family - bad policy - it never works!  On the other hand, there are always users and the used....it is a cycle of life and the trick is figuring it out before it happens.  If you don't, then making a "note to self" - do not do that again!  It is tough though in a world where folks are all about themselves, you try and reach out, you try and be kind....sometimes it just backfires because I think some folks just like the game of seeing how much they can get away with!

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6. 62

   Daniel Carterposted 14 years ago

   Wow. He already owes you money and he's asking for more. How red is that flag??
   Just be honest. Tell him you have no reason to trust him because he still owes *YOU* money.
   
   Hope he doesn't harass you.

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7. 0

   sneakorocksolidposted 14 years ago

   If you're going to loan money just give it to him don't expect it back. If you can't afford to give it to him then the answer is no. Look you work hard for your money and it's not easy to come by if he was a real friend he wouldn't ask, I'm afraid he may think your easy.

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8. 61

   zadrobiposted 14 years ago

   I just want to know how he is going to pay you back $500 dollars next week. Is he going to use the money to buy/sell/front drugs and give you back your portion of the return?
   Maybe the drug dealing scenario is extreme...
   I would ask him what he needs it for and act concerned and tell him you want to help but you don't have that kind of money "just lying around".
   
   Then ask him for your money

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9. 88

   Stacie Lposted 14 years ago

   don't do it...
   you'll never see the money or that person again...as a friend at least

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   1. 0

      sneakorocksolidposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Hear!Hear!

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10. 0

    A Texanposted 14 years ago

    Can I borrow 50

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11. 66

    Flightkeeperposted 14 years ago

    Izzy, now is a good time to learn the power of no.  If you can't say no, just tell him that you don't have it because you bought something that was so expensive. Yeah, that's it.. lie. It's more convenient.

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12. 84

    donotfearposted 14 years ago

    Best to say NO.  I had this happen to me and the person didn't pay me back for 3 years, then, out of the blue, contacted me with a huge sob story bla blah blah. I didn't beieve a word of it. I got the money back, but didn't get the interest I was promised.

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13. 60

    hudsonj1994posted 14 years ago

    Yeah it has happened to me several times!

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14. 75

    NaomiRposted 14 years ago

    Don't do it. $500 is a LOT of money to ask someone for.

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15. 62

    prettydarkhorseposted 14 years ago

    he owed you still money,right? well you know him well now, tell him honestly that you cant lend him the money and if he asked the reason then tell him again...BIG NO..

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16. 60

    izzy_gigglesposted 14 years ago

    So after 2 days, he finally came up to me and asked if I was going to do it, and this is what I said
    
    
    "sorry _____, but im not going to be able to do it, nothing personal, but I have my own issues to deal with, but I still love you...as a friend "
    
    whew, i feel so proud of myself....I know, I know I should have just said no from the beginning, but I just cant say no to friends...Thanks a bunch guys

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    1. 0

       Stevennix2001posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       wow, good job.  im glad to see that your friend didn't take advantage of you this time.

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    2. 0

       cosetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       oh haha...you solved your dilemma. good job!

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17. 61

    Fugitive From Nowposted 14 years ago

    I loaned, what I thought was, a friend of mine 50 bucks.  Then I never seen him again.  I thought that was cheap to get ride of someone that wasn't my friend.  But $500 is too much.

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18. 68

    dreamer32posted 14 years ago

    yes, I have felt used by a friend!In contrast, What bothers me is when someone asks questions and they going telling your business to another person just after you tell them not do it at all. I had people to do me like that! Even if I told them little something about me! Too, That person go tell anyway! True friends don't abuse sacrifice, if that person was a true friend. They would be a blessing to you, not be a person that abuses sacrficing for you! Some people do abuse sarcifice from other people! Come check out my article I written
    
    http://hubpages.com/hub/Fake-friends-or … difference

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19. 60

    Luciendaskyposted 14 years ago

    my dad always said to only lend people money is you are willing to give it to them, because you may never see it again...
    
    HOWEVER, if your co-worker already owes you money, don't lend him anymore... at least until he has repaid you. I lent a friend 300 once because of an emergency situation... I knew her well, knew she valued our friendship, and trusted her to pay me back BUT I also decided she was dear enough to me that I would still be friends with her if she didn't pay me back.
    
    She paid me back.

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20. 0

    lyricsingrayposted 14 years ago

    My theory has always been if I lend money I assume I will not get it back. 
    
    Not on purpose but for other reasons unknown to me.
    
    So I only lend money when I can afford to spare it myself.  If it is returned It's a bonus, otherwise, water under the bridge.
    
    Note; I do not however let people know this to be taken advantage of. 
    
    Ooops, guess I just did :

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    1. 70

       Cagsilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       

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21. 69

    fishtiger58posted 14 years ago

    I don't lend money to friends because I am uncomfortable asking for it back.

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