Americans in particular are attached to that old independent pioneer, "pull-yourself-up by the bootstraps" mentality. There's a great under-tone of rugged individualism and independence to the detriment of society. It has developed from a misunderstanding, I believe, of the concept of government's aid to individuals. When the government subsidized our health insurance payments so we didn't have to pay $800 a month while my husband was laid off, a friend, dear as she is, made the comment that her family doesn't accept "hand-outs". In regard to charity from churches, people don't want to accept help because being of good moral character, they feel they'd have to "pay back" by embracing the particular faith of that church even though the people giving attach no strings. It's an internal obligation that the recipient feels, but to which he or she doesn't want to commit.
As for asking family or friends, Americans especially, won't do that because of the obligation they think they will will incur. There is also quote from Ben Franklin that is alive and well in this culture "neither a borrower nor a lender be". It is also felt that money passed between relatives or friends has the potential of severing the relationship. It's terribly unfortunate because if families would band together as some of my students' families from other countries do, we'd progress much more rapidly. The lack of money holds us back. Right now, my cousin inherited a great deal of money and has her own money that she just doesn't know what to do with. If she would simply OFFER to, let's say, give me a loan to have my ebook in print form, I could begin to do well. But I won't ask her. Even a loan to us at a low interest rate to pay off the RV that we owe on would save us a great deal of interest payments. However, I feel that I could never call her and tell her that we went out to a restaurant to eat. She would consider that an extravagance.
The best we can do with this knowledge is recognize that "money up-front" as I call it, helps our children and our friends, the majority of whom are responsible individuals. "Tough love" and holding back is holding EVERYONE back. So it's important to be generous of heart. The solution for those who are wealthy and want to overcome the stereotypes I painted, is to NOT OFFER, just GIVE without expecting anything in return. Be astute to a person's needs, don't worry about "enabling," have faith in people, and give if you have it to give.