Are you a people pleaser?
If so, do you find yourself resentful or anxious about it?
People pleaser has a negative connotation to it, as if you have a need to make people happy. In that sense, no. But, if someone's being a downer I'll steer the conversation towards flattering them, so they'll stop being a downer- I sometimes please people for my own benefit, and I might resent or feel anxious about how the other person is going to act, but not about trying to please people.
There are so many different people in the world, how could anyone possibly
" please " everyone ? I tend to try to accomodate everyone, but, sometimes that is impossible, so the best thing is do what you would want someone to do for you...
whether it be in the physical sense or just wordage...When it comes to people having a negative or " downer " attitude..I have a little trick that has worked for years...I calmly say " Wow, look at those clouds..love your shoes"..they automatically stop and ask " what did you say ?"..I look them in the eyes and say, "I love your earrings/ lipstick colour/shade of what ever they are wearing... really looks good on you"....it's a sub-liminal mind trick...try it their whole persona changes...
Sometimes you need to say 'no' to even your best friend, or lover. I used to be a total failure in those cases. Though I am not the person who tries to please everyone, to get her way through; I am afraid of hurting anybody, even if I actually detest that person. That is really a weakness.
Saying 'no' as a matter of principle, particularly in professional dealings were not difficult for me, I guess because, there was always a logical understanding that what I was to effect others, and not only one. But when it came to choosing between hurting me and another, I buckled.
Later, I discovered that stalling the decision for some time, and later taking it up, to state clearly why I don't agree to it, is a better way of saying 'no'. It may displease the other person, but cannot hurt him, if the relationship is meaningful.
by Recently Awakened 5 years ago
Are you a people pleaser?
by Siny J 5 years ago
Who have you been trying to please?How has your concern with pleasing this person kept you from standing up for what you know is true?
by Pollyanna Jones 3 years ago
Hello dear Hubbers,Am I getting the wrong end of the stick? I've had a good read of this http://hubpages.com/faq/#hpads-payments and from my understanding, the earnings in January up to 26th should be paid to my PayPal account on 28th February. Is this correct, or will this go through in March? I...
by Super Lux 6 years ago
I used to think I don't want to disappoint the world, but then I realized the world doesn't really care. I do. So, now I'm out to not disappoint myself. I'm gonna release myself from baseless worries and toxic shame. It's time to give myself the happiness that is long overdue and...
by tdebrick 7 years ago
How did you learn how to say NO and mean it?How did you stop being a people pleaser?
by Grace Marguerite Williams 5 years ago
Would YOU describe YOURSELF as a people pleaser? Or a person who let it RIP and doesthings in his/her OWN INDIVIDUAL way, let society and consequences be damned?
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