How do you help a family member who has extreme stressors?
Whar are the best self help techniques for a person who is extremely stressed and how can progress be made in this area?
When I am overwhelmed by stressful things in my life, I tend to crave control. So I make a list. I write down everything that is stressing me from the floor needing sweeping to the more serious things like a huge expense coming up. Everything bothering me gets on the list.
Once I make the list, I evaluate it to find the things I can control. Some stressors are outside of our control, but some we can fix. Once I have my list, I attempt to check off some of the things bothering me that I can take care of. I put my head down and try to take care of them one at a time. It gives me feelings of accomplishment and control--over at least a few things in my life.
Teach them to let go.
We try to control everything. I am speaking from experience. Often we are confronted with things that are beyond our control and that is an additional stressor.
If there are things they can control, help them to work on those. It is a gradual process.
The stress did not all of sudden appear so it will not go away suddenly.
Be there to listen and lift them up. Be supportive but if the stress seems to spiral out of control then you may suggest that they seek counseling. If you are too close to the person you may not be able to help them so much as you may be too close to the situation.
Addressing whatever the stressors are is fundamental. They may or may not share those with you. Regardless the source of the stress needs to be addressed. If it is a long term stressor (like family members diagnosed with terminal cancer who struggle with it for years and years) or stressors of lesser duration, such as a night class that is difficult or very time consuming.
Tell them (after identifying the stressor)
to come up with a realistic plan
ask for help
There will always be stress. Learn to recognize when it is becomes so overwhelming you feel powerless.
This is wonderful, I can pull this up on my laptop and re-read it whenever I might feel overwhelmed by the situations that others are going thru, as well as myself, You give a wonderful comment to a complex ? and thankx...I will follow you.
If I recognize that a family member is under deep stress, I will try my best to get him/ner the help needed.. Hopefully they will be open to my suggestions of help, but if not, there is very little I could do except to be supportive and available as needed. My intervention would include.
1) confidential talks, encouragement and support, and assistance as needed.
2) I would encourage him/her to think about their situation and provide encouragement in making the best choices possible to eliminate the stress.
3) My encouragement would include the need for rest and relaxation along with 8 hours of sleep nightly. Also to go for long walks and even do a little exercise to help in feeling less stressful.
4) I would recommend that he/she write down the problems causing the stress and write down possible solutions to the problems. Then start working on the best way to achieve the goal to eliminate the stress.
5) I would introduce to him/her the serenity prayer. There are things we can change, and there are things we cannot change...and we need to know the difference and accept.
6) If all else fails, I would recommend therapeutic counseling if stress proves to be much more than what he/she could handle (even with family support). I would even try to select a good psychologist or counselor if he/she is unable to do this on their own.
You can't change what you can't see so find the source of the stress. Until you do that it's likely the stress will continue. Then once that has happened, find measures to overcome it by confronting it. Use breathing techniques, reassurance, support, patience. Take small steps to confront the problem, anything too big will overwhelm and send the person back to square one. Good luck.
This is tricky. As it depends on a person's nature. Some people like to be left alone, when they are under stress, they take their own time to come out of the stressful situation.
While there are people, who get out the stressful situation by talking it out with those who are close to him/ her.
There is not one particular formula for every one. It depends on the age, sex, gravity of the stressful situation and many other factors.
As for me I share my worries and stress with my husband and after that I feel lighter.
My husband does the same. No situation, good or bad can remain forever. So, the best thing is to let the stressful situation pass by and keep your calm.
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