Why do people have difficulty asking for help?

Jump to Last Post 1-5 of 5 discussions (5 posts)
  1. Cute Edge profile image71
    Cute Edgeposted 4 years ago

    Why do people have difficulty asking for help?

    people manage situations that are beyond the capability and capacity until things get really messed up

  2. dashingscorpio profile image86
    dashingscorpioposted 4 years ago

    Misplaced pride keeps many people from asking for help.
    Other reasons may include being embarrassed over bad choices they've made which led to their dire circumstances, not wanting to (feel) obligated or indebted to anyone, and having a lack of trust that any helper would be discrete.
    It takes a certain amount of courage to admit one doesn't have all the answers when they've made it their life's mission not to appear at a lost when it comes to controlling or dealing with things .
    Very few people are willing to reveal their insecurities and fears. An old quote states: "Better to be silent and thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt." Inherently the message is to avoid looking stupid. Pride keeps people from avoiding the appearance of being weak or not having it "together" in some way.

  3. Josh Makaveli profile image36
    Josh Makaveliposted 4 years ago

    some people have ego problem and they dont ask and some are shy and some dont trust so there can be variety of reasons why people dont and try to solve them on their own but when everything gets messed up they call for help because after that they dont have any other option to do

  4. Billie Kelpin profile image86
    Billie Kelpinposted 4 years ago

    Americans in particular are attached to that old independent pioneer, "pull-yourself-up by the bootstraps" mentality. There's a great under-tone of rugged individualism and independence to the detriment of society.  It has developed from a misunderstanding, I believe, of the concept of government's aid to individuals.  When the government subsidized our health insurance payments so we didn't have to pay $800 a month while my husband was laid off, a friend, dear as she is, made the comment that her family doesn't accept "hand-outs".  In regard to charity from churches, people don't want to accept help because being of good moral character, they feel they'd have to "pay back" by embracing the particular faith of that church even though the people giving attach no strings.  It's an internal obligation that the recipient feels, but to which he or she doesn't want to commit. 
    As for asking family or friends, Americans especially, won't do that because of the obligation they think they will will incur.  There is also quote from Ben Franklin that is alive and well in this culture "neither a borrower nor a lender be".  It is also felt that money passed between relatives or friends has the potential of severing the relationship. It's terribly unfortunate because if families would band together as some of my students' families from other countries do, we'd progress much more rapidly.  The lack of money holds us back.  Right now, my cousin inherited a great deal of money and has her own money that she just doesn't know what to do with. If she would simply OFFER to, let's say, give me a loan to have my ebook in print form, I could begin to do well. But I won't ask her. Even a loan to  us at a low interest rate to pay off the RV that we owe on would save us a great deal of interest payments.  However, I feel that I could never call her and tell her that we went out to a restaurant to eat.  She would consider that an extravagance.

    The best we can do with this knowledge is recognize that "money up-front" as I call it, helps our children and our friends, the majority of whom are responsible individuals.  "Tough love" and holding back is holding EVERYONE back.  So it's important to be generous of heart.  The solution for those who are wealthy and want to overcome the stereotypes I painted,  is to NOT OFFER, just GIVE without expecting anything in return. Be astute to a person's needs, don't worry about "enabling," have faith in people, and give if you have it to give.

  5. Snøwman profile image61
    Snøwmanposted 4 years ago

    Some of the reasons I have difficulty asking for help.

    I don't really know what to ask or how to ask the question.

    If I ask for help they might ask me a question that I don't know the answer too.

    Others a busy and I don't want to bother them.

    Others helping gets in my way and I would rather work independently.

    Nobody around me has the right knowledge or skills.

    Sometimes I learn better through trial and error than by someone teaching me.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)