Why Do Some Men And Women Just Go Into The Hermit life Of Living?

Jump to Last Post 1-6 of 6 discussions (13 posts)
  1. Atcelle profile image52
    Atcelleposted 2 years ago

    Why Do Some Men And Women Just Go Into The Hermit life Of Living?

    Some individuals just go into a life in a shelf of their former selves when something in their lives didn't work out.


  2. dashingscorpio profile image86
    dashingscorpioposted 2 years ago

    They decide to play it safe in order to avoid futre pain and disappointment. You have to want more something than you fear failure. For example it takes more courage to fall in love a 2nd, 3rd, or 4th time than it doses the first time.
    This is especially true if they got their heart broke.
    "Once bitten, twice shy."

    1. Atcelle profile image52
      Atcelleposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Yes! dashingscorpio you have a fine point there, and Yes! I understand what you mean on the other hand playing it safe is good but showing strength is better as one must show individuals that Yes! They can go on even after what they went through.

    2. dashingscorpio profile image86
      dashingscorpioposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Marcelle, I agree with you. However your question was (Why?)
      Therefore I didn't bother to weigh in with any advice or solutions. smile

    3. Atcelle profile image52
      Atcelleposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      That's reasonable dashingscorpio smile

  3. Ken Burgess profile image91
    Ken Burgessposted 2 years ago

    Sure, when something devastating has happened, or when what life has thrown at you has overwhelmed.

    Age doesn't factor a lot into that, you can be a kid, or a grandparent.

    Health issues aside, drug related aside, a perfectly normal functioning person can choose to withdraw if hit with too much, and feels overloaded or overwhelmed.

    A person can only take so much mental and emotional trauma and turmoil, just like the body can only take so much.  They are much the same in that sense... put too many demands on the body and it will break down, same goes for the mind and spirit.

    For most of us, just like an injured body will recover from the injuries, a person will recover.  It takes time.

    1. Atcelle profile image52
      Atcelleposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Yes! Exactly! It does take time and it takes strength as well for each individuals to get over all obstacles to show themselves and other that Yes! They are strong and can bounce back from all life's challenges, and one must know when to go back in s

  4. WordCrafter09 profile image71
    WordCrafter09posted 2 years ago

    If someone has been through something (or a bunch of "somethings"), they can know that it's too much to expect some people to understand.  Trying to help someone else understand can make it worse when they don't and/or when they jump to the conclusion of assuming they know how to relate anyway.

    Also, when someone is having a hard time mustering fake positive-ness all the time they can choose to stay away from others because they don't want to darken the doorstep of those others.

    It's just easier for those, and a few other, reasons to keep to oneself and not have what one is dealing with/getting over made worse and more complicated by having to worry about dealing with other people.

    It can be hard for people who automatically just seek out someone else for "support" to understand that not everyone does that, and some people would rather keep things simple by keeping all "unnecessary" people at a distance.  Of course, if one is a parent one may find the energy to be what one needs to be around one's children.   That may be about all the person-in-question thinks he/she needs to muster up.

    People should be careful not to assume that because someone is keeping to himself he is "a shell of his former self".  It's very possible that person is very much his same old self but has decided that while he once could be bothered trying to be what someone else expected him to be, or being what he was when he didn't have some big thing to deal with; he is asserting his right to do what's right for him under the circumstances.

    It's often said that "nobody loves you when you're down and out".  I'd say something different:  There are some people who seem to like you better when you're "down and out" in some way.  When one is dealing with something he/she can't be bothered with all that kind of baloney or with worrying about anyone he/she considers "extra people".  It doesn't mean the person-in-question has changed or doesn't care about them - only that, for a time, he/she is better off keeping them at some distance.  (Again, I see children, even grown ones, as exceptions from that).

    Also, with some people more than others, there are times when someone will turn a person's "thing" into being "all about them" first and foremost.  When one can't be bothered with a "power struggle" of whose "thing"/"issue" it really is pulling inward is the best way to avoid those "power struggles".

    "Shell of former self" may indicate how little that other person understands.

    1. Atcelle profile image52
      Atcelleposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      ME Whelan you have such relavent points and Yes! I'm in agreement with all of them and Yes! Strength must be measure to help the individual find back him or herself to gain back entry in among society

  5. peachpurple profile image80
    peachpurpleposted 2 years ago

    ah, this is very common among the singles.
    My brother in law and I have 2 male friends who are still single.
    They lived in a hermit life.
    They closed their doors from the public and their relatives too.
    Family members could not understand their weird behavior.
    Very agitated over small matters and not sociable.
    They live in their shell, to protect themselves from getting hurt, physically and emotionally.

    1. Atcelle profile image52
      Atcelleposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      peachy some may think that this is wise and Yes! It is to a point, but you know what? It also shows cowardism of weakness, the world is the world and all aspects of living in it changes one Yes! The change of good or bad, ways are learning tools.

  6. tamarawilhite profile image90
    tamarawilhiteposted 2 years ago

    It hurts less than trying and failing. Repeated rejections can do this, as can a severe trauma / bad divorce.

    1. Atcelle profile image52
      Atcelleposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      I also understand this Tamara Wilhite but if everyone decides to hide themselves away because of all you have mentioned what will society be like? It's takes courage determination boldness strength faith the need to go on forgive forget move on .


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)