Hi everyone, I'm Aiysha and write poetry generally during difficult or conflicting times in my life. I have hubbed the poems that I have written in the last year and I would really appreciate some feedback if at all possible. I am very greatful for any comments whether it is possitive or constructive criticism. Thanks all!
I read your poem "Seasons of Life" on the hub of the same name, and I was touched by it. It's a good poem.
Just read we sisters, I liked it very much, very sweet and sincere, keep up the good work.
Thank you both very much! I only recently started to share my poetry with family and friends, like in the last 6 months to a year but when I found this site I thought I could share it with others and try to see what people take from it.
'Seasons of Life' was written a couple of years ago now, I wrote it for my cousin's 2 year old son that had just died. I was thinking of reciting it at his funeral but I thought it might be a bit too upsetting for my cousin and his wife.
'We Sisters' was written in my sister's bedroom. I had just found out from someone else that day about something unspeakable happening to her and as we have always been so close I couldn't believe she hadn't told me. But as always she wanted to protect me. I told her I knew and she sobbed all through telling me about it. When I went upstairs I was so deeply moved but angrey at myself because I live in a different town and I wasn't there when she needed me most. I was inspired, I started writing then 10 minutes later I went down stairs and gave her it. Which subsequently made her cry even more unfortunately but it was more a cry of relief and reassurance.
I guess after reading "We Sisters," I can note that the first letters of each line are capitalized. Most contemporary writers shun away from thus because 1) it is a common a auto formatting in word documents 2) grammatically it is incorrect 3) it was a form adopted in classic poetry. Maybe consider lower casing unless there is a inherent conceptual strategy for formatting as so. One poet who clearly deviates from the idea of grammatical standards to progress his poetic intent would be e.e. cummings.
Hey Aiysha - I'm not sure you need to get much feedback just yet - you are still finding a voice but all I'd say is - keep writing and sharing and also don't feel bound by structure and rhyme and metre - find your own way and express what you want to say in the way that feels most like you and not in a way that someone else does it. I guess I'm saying take some risks and have fun with it.
by SLD7 years ago
Ok so I don't really know how to get started around here, so after reading a few topics I figured I should just go ahead and post something. I have absolutely no idea what qualifies something as poetry, as I didn't pay...
by tmbridgeland6 years ago
I now have 22 chapters of a novel up on HubPages. It has been an interesting experience. I have decided to continue. I am wondering what the experience others have had putting novels up here. Positive, negative? Since I...
by Oztinato19 months ago
Is asking for feedback another way to get views moving? Perhaps it would be better to ask for comments or viewpoints. You show me your feedback and I'll show you mine perhaps. Desire to improve just might be unrelated...
by LegendaryN86 years ago
I put this in the "answers" section and it actually should've been posted here.Many of us may be not performing to our fullest potential because we haven't taken a critical eye to each others' content. I...
by David Acklin19 months ago
Hi Hubbers,I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my Hub Starting a Career as an On-line Translator (must be signed in to view). What can I do to improve?...
by dilshanh6 years ago
I am a new hubber (just few weeks ago) and discovered this wonderful forum just today. It motivates to have constructive criticism. Please let me know your feedback.
Copyright © 2017 HubPages Inc. and respective owners.
Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners.
HubPages® is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc.