Politics and Friends. What do you think?

1. 77

   stevesoposted 11 years ago

   I am a gay American living in a foreign country with my same sex partner. The reason I am living abroad is that my country, the USA, will not allow my partner to live with me in the US. I, naturally support Obama because he is my only chance for immigration laws to change, thus allowing me to sponsor my partner. Romney and Ryan have stated that they would never allow such a thing to happen. I have a friend back in the US who is a strong right wing conservative Republican and backs the GOP stand on gay rights, gay marriage and denial of immigration rights for binational couples. At the same time this friend tells me how supportive she is towards me and my situation. She also constantly sends me right wing Romney propaganda. What do you think? Is she really a friend?

   replyreport
   1. 0

      Motown2Chitownposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      She probably thinks she is a friend.  If she is truly accepting of your partner and your situation and aware of the fact that you are NOT a supporter of her candidate, she would never inundate you with right wing literature or propaganda.  I have friends with whom I vehemently disagree on many things politically.  We simply don't talk about those things unless we both feel that it would be productive.  Rather than thinking she doesn't care or isn't your friend, I would think she's just inconsiderate.  If it bothers you, then you have every right to let her know and ask her to stop.

      replyreport
      1. 77

         stevesoposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks. I have explained my feelings to her. She just thinks it is selfish of me and laughs it off.

         replyreport
         1. 0

            Motown2Chitownposted 11 years agoin reply to this

            Selfish of you?  Oh my goodness!  No, it is in no way selfish of you to ask for the respect you deserve from a friend.  Perhaps it's time for you to put your foot down and tell her that enough is enough.  You don't push your feelings on her, I assume.  Therefore, she has no right to do that to you.  It's a very backhanded way for her to tell you that your lifestyle is unacceptable to her, and if that's the case, she has every right to feel that way, but no right to call herself your friend.  I'm so sorry.    I can't imagine how difficult that must be - especially coming from someone who claims to care for you.  Let her know, in no uncertain terms, that to accept you, she must respect what is acceptable to you.  If she is constantly throwing these things at you, she has no respect for you, your ideas, or (most importantly) your feelings.  Friends don't do those things to each other and then laugh it off.
            
            IMO, anyway.
            
            Best of luck to you.  I'll be glad when you're able to come home and bring your partner with you.

            replyreport
            1. 77

               stevesoposted 11 years agoin reply to this

               Thank you again. I have recently emailed her telling her that the only thing I want is the same rights her and her husband enjoy. No response yet.

               replyreport
      2. 59

         Josakposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         +1

         replyreport
   2. 59

      Josakposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Power to you man, I hope we can one day get this country to the point where people like yourself can return and where we no longer discriminate against our fellow man.

      replyreport
      1. 77

         stevesoposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks Josak. i appreciate your comment very much.

         replyreport
2. 65

   maxoxam41posted 11 years ago

   I don't think so, if she wants to adopt her ideology. And how can you be friend with her if she doesn't accept you the way you are? It reminds me of those catholic people who try to hand you their religious leaflet when you're telling them that you're an atheist!

   replyreport
3. 61

   tammybarnetteposted 11 years ago

   I had never considered this circumstance and here I think of myself as very open-minded. I am a Democrat, I am voting for Obama, and I support gay rights, which is just human rights as far as I am concerned. As for your friend, yes I think she is being a friend. Conservatives see the world differently. I do not even pretend to understand their views, but many off them are good people. I pray every night that Obama wins this election. Romney/Ryan are messing with my rights to my own body as well. I will say a prayer for you dear sir, and if your not a christian I do not mean to offend...I do not understand unbelievers anymor than I do conservatives, but I support their right to believe however they so choose:)

   replyreport
   1. 77

      stevesoposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for support and your prayers. Good intentions do not offend. I thank you again.

      replyreport
4. 84

   rebekahELLEposted 11 years ago

   That's up to you and her.  I don't think a true friendship allows politics to take center stage.  Perhaps she's in need of the Sean Pean/Kid Rock public service announcement... it's rather appropriate right now in our divisive media- crazed political climate.  {although wacky, it has a message) Just google it ~
   
   I recently met my new neighbors who moved here from Texas because they felt persecuted for their gay lifestyle. I think it's sad that people can be so misguided as to shun others because of their sexual orientation.  Best to you and your partner.

   replyreport
   1. 77

      stevesoposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for your great comments and your experiences.

      replyreport