How do you deal with people who are very negative?

1. 63

   alexandriaruthkposted 11 years ago

   How do you deal with people who are very negative?
   
   Do you try to just ignore them or weave them into your smiling world?

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2. 82

   Efficient Adminposted 11 years ago

   I certainly do not try to weave them into my world -- I try to limit as much contact as possible.  I can't control how people view the world and I believe negative people will rain on your parade and drag you down if you are not careful, so I will limit contact with them.

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3. 79

   Pamela-anneposted 11 years ago

   I think first of all you must not let their negative views bring your spirits down; you must remind yourself to stay and think positive which is not always easy especially if you are around negative people.  Another thing to do is try and avoid hanging out with people who tend to always look on the negative side of things, always looking for the negative in a positive situation.  These are the kind of people will look at the glass as half empty instead of half full.  Negative people can be very draining emotionally dragging us down into a negative mindset if we allow it.  I say stay away from those who are always giving off the negative vibes and look for more positive people to hang with.  I guarantee you will get a natural high from being surrounded by positive people. These people will encourage you not discourage you! Remember think Positive and Have a Great Day!

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4. 60

   oz-vitezposted 11 years ago

   I simply react just as negative if not more negative than the person. That way, I multiply a negative by a negative and get a positive. Basic math, folks.

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5. 79

   rondmrnposted 11 years ago

   I try to avoid negative people but even the people you are friends with can be negative at times, which is only human nature. I found that the best way to deal with them, is to change your attitude towards them. Your attitude can make a great impact in your relationship with them. Try to spin things positively but do not be fake.
   
   However, if things do not really work out for you. I guess you have to avoid them!

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6. 0

   Sri Tposted 11 years ago

   It depends on who the person is. If it is a stranger, you can casually humor them and move on to more positive people. If it is a family member you can suggest that we take the energy up. If they don't want to do that, then find the nearest exit. Basically, detachment is the key. I am responsible for my inner world. My happiness depends totally on myself. Since most people are not aware of the fact that their thoughts are the cause of their highs and lows, they will talk about anything. They will listen to anything. Once you become aware of your own thoughts and feelings, you can decide which thoughts to entertain. When dealing with negative people, you can also change the subject. Just lead the conversation in a new direction.

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7. 69

   mathsmasterposted 11 years ago

   Well there are always some reasons behind the negative thoughts, attitudes ..
   Human mind is tempted more towards the wrong things. Its natural.
   So if you think you are good enough to correct ones thoughts then you must make a try. You should erase the negative thoughts from his minds and let him to give way to positive thoughts.
   However if you do not care and those negative thoughts aren't any source of trouble for you then you can also avoid them.
   Usually people try to avoid such members of the society. Whereas being a good human we should try at least once to get them corrected .

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8. 81

   GwennyOhposted 11 years ago

   I try to avoid toxic people as much as humanly possible.  There is no doubt that their negativity affects those around them.  I try not to smile at them either, although if it comes to a choice between smiling and letting them believe they got under my skin, then I'll smile.
   
   I try to avoid smiling at them because I believe it falsely states that their way of approaching interactions is okay by me.  At some point they must recognize that it's time to upgrade their outlook somewhat.

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   1. 0

      Larry Wallposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      How do you identify a toxic person?

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9. 59

   NotPCposted 11 years ago

   If they are expressing their negativity in my direction, I admit to myself that they are acting that way for a reason.  It may or may not be my fault they are feeling so foul.  Most likely they are upset for reasons outside of your control, and responding or criticizing their negativity only further upsets them.
   
   Depending on the situation and relation to the negative individual, I find that avoiding the person is probably the best course of action.

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10. 0

    Larry Wallposted 11 years ago

    I have been accused by more than one person of being negative. I do not believe I am negative, I am just not agreeable to every idea, suggestion or plan that I hear.
    
    At my last job, we were planning a reception to be held in the backyard of our office. I asked "what's the rain plan." I was told I was being negative.
    
    My old boss had idea for a guest speaker for our annual meeting. He was a former oil exec who was making a lot of speeches. He had a contract with a company for arranging his bookings and that contract prohibits any freebees. I remarked that I was pretty sure the speaker was under contract. "There you go being negative."
    
    When a co-worker, higher pay grade, made a suggestion, I pointed out a few problems (he wanted members to call our office and give us their credit card numbers so we could book their hotel rooms.) with the plan he had developed. Again, I was labeled as a negative person.
    
    So how do you deal with me.
    You ask me a question, expect an honest answer and not necessarily the answer you wanted.
    
    You can ask my opinion on an issue, I may disagree with you. Because you know you are right, that means I am being negative.
    
    When I talk about gun control, the First Amendment, and conflicts in the constitution and you do not agree. It means I am negative.
    
    The list goes on and on.
    
    I have stated publicly many times, I am not an yes man. I told my former boss, who told me he did not want to hear about what was done before he arrived, that since I retained the institutional knowledge of the association, I would tell him what we did and if it worked or not. That would not mean I was opposing his plan. It just meant I was giving him more information. I also promised that by the end of the day, I would have completed the project the way he wanted it done, regardless of my personal opinion.
    
    So the answer is that if you want to deal with me and those like me, to please listen to what we have to say and at least respect the concept that my view may be different from yours and I could be right or I could be wrong, but at least I was offering an opinion, an idea or some input.

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    1. 100

       Melissa A Smithposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Great answer. It's very unfortunate that thinking, truth-telling people are crudely labelled as negative when they should be considered resources.

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    2. 68

       Man of Strengthposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Great answer. You are brutally honest. I can respect that. I think a negative person is looking to criticize or be negative intentionally.

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       sritanuposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Hi Larry,  What i feel is like you must be given the first chance to present any idea so as to get your idea painted on other's mind to avoid conflicts. I feel like you have the habit of considering both sides of the coin, which is good.

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    4. 70

       Abby Campbellposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       I agree with Man of Strength. A negative person is one who intentionally goes out of her way to beat someone up and personally attack them. You are not that, Larry.

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11. 80

    A Little TRUTHposted 11 years ago

    Put as much distance between you and him/her as possible.  Then send them love.  Tell yourself that you love them.  It’s important to keep yourself in the feeling of love and not hate so that their negativity does not affect you.
    
    If it’s a family member or workmate, and you can’t create a physical separation, you can still maintain an attitude separation.  Focus on yourself and maintain your positive attitude.  Keep a feeling of love for that person, acknowledging that he is a fellow human soul, albeit maybe a little ignorant of certain things at this time.  Give him the benefit of the doubt.
    
    Eventually, your positivity will either rub off on him and he will improve, or it will repel hem and he will be gone.

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12. 58

    rexyposted 11 years ago

    I think that people who also think that they are right are in fact the ones who are   negative - and these are the ones that are hard to deal with..... for me ....Dealing with them is like talking to a brick wall or beating around the bush...as they say.... also very hard to ignore them.... all depends on what World you are living in....

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13. 67

    connorjposted 11 years ago

    
    
    Simply be positive and if they are truly negative or even closed to suggestions that counter their position, in other words, they are merely looking for the classic group-think misfotunate series of events, or even looking for mere validation your positiveness will eventually give ear to logical criticism that they may internalize...

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14. 61

    kundhanposted 11 years ago

    First we need to understand that "its only the time that makes people go negative and they are no negative people!!"
    the biggest open secret is "when are wrong we forgive and go ahead but when others are wrong we just stick on..!!"
    we just need to focus on the value of human and go ahead..
    everyone at some point go negative.. no one is an exception.!!
    a little change in our mind would make things back!!
    * ignoring will make people much depressed.

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15. 70

    Abby Campbellposted 11 years ago

    It's definitely difficult dealing with negative people. As an upbeat positive person, as well as one who is sensitive, a negative person can have much impact on the spirit of that person. Even though a positive person can try to influence the negative person just the same, the negative usually wins which is unfortunate. Some people are just not happy or content with themselves, and they want to parade on others to bring them down to the valley of despair as well.
    
    Personally, I have always tried to seek the best out of negative people in past years. All it brought me was grief. As I'm older now, I have learned to avoid these people like the plague. Killing them with kindness and walking away is the best I can do to save myself.

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