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How to Get the Girl of Your Dreams: Surefire Tips For the Unsure Man

Updated on November 27, 2009
eveklof profile image

Ms. Klof is a native New Yorker. She works as a licensed therapist and specializes in couples and sex counseling.

Manners are key! Act like a gentleman and you will get your dream lady.
Manners are key! Act like a gentleman and you will get your dream lady.

Don't Be Scared! The Girl of Your Dreams Can Be Yours...

First Things First: Let me introduce myself. My name is Ms.Klof. I am one of those beautiful, smart unapproachable girls you daydream about but never actually pursue. I don't envy you. In my opinion, men definitely got shortchanged in the world of dating. You are accountable for everything. You are the one who is supposed to approach the girl, impress the girl, and ask her out. All of this without turning her off, looking uncool, or making her nervous. It is a delicate art, indeed. And the sad truth is, rejection is the norm. You poor guys gather up all your nerve only to be shot down over and over again. Let me help you help yourselves. Here are a few things to keep in mind when you are pursuing the girl of your dreams:

1) It is uncomfortable being a girl sometimes. We are constantly being ogled and objectified. Sure, sometimes its flattering, but a lot of times it makes us feel vulnerable and uneasy. When you approach a girl, try to avoid staring at her (oh and those 'secret' glances at her cleavage- not so secret, she can see that from a mile away). The true girl of your dreams should be attractive, of course, but you should also be intrigued by her character, personality, and conversation. Ask her about herself and truly take the time to listen. This will award you lots of points.

2) 90% of the male population will not even attempt to approach the girl of their dreams. She is too intimidating, too risky. Therefore, the most beautiful girls are often quite unaware of their effect on men. If you have the guts to approach her like a gentleman, she will probably be pleasantly surprised.

3) Bragging is corny. Girls don't like to hear you go on and on about your accomplishments. Be confident, and remember that talking about how great you are actually makes you seem more insecure.

4) Goofy is good. Don't be afraid to show her your less-than-cool side. Women love men that make them laugh.

5) Keep the beauty routine simple. Girls want to be more girly than their boyfriends. If you spend hours preening, she might wonder if you find yourself more attractive than her.

6) Be a gentleman. Trust me, polite men are far and few between these days. Women love to be treated like ladies.

7) Cool your jets. Pushy men are not attractive. If you are patient and gentle with her, she will reward your deepest fantasies-in her own time.

8) Be a good friend. Call her. Talk to her. Help her out. Hang out with her. This is the foundation of a truly romantic relationship.

9) Don't smother her. Let her live her life, and this will show her that you trust her. Encourage her to pursue her interests and goals. She will anyway, she just might not keep you around if you breathe down her neck.

10) Tell her what you like about her, and don't be generic. She needs to know, above all, that she is special to you.

So, there you have it. Basically all I want to remind you guys is that even the most amazingly hot women are humans. They are subject to vulnerability, pain, and discouragement. No matter how hot she is, she will have her heart broken at one time or another, same as everybody else. Treat her like a human being, and you will be miles ahead of even the suavest casanovas.

© 2009 eveklof


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    • PainReliefGuy profile image

      PainReliefGuy 6 years ago

      Good suggestions. I was a relationship coach while I lived in Chicago. Guys need to realize that it's okay to be human. Don't over think it and relax.