Tips and tricks on How to create an online dating profile
Online dating in our present days
Nowadays online dating is getting more and more popular, as we can already know - according to recent surveys it is already a bigger business than pornography in the USA – and I guess that’s great news for those who are thinking about whether they should try online dating or not. Without any doubt, for most of the people online dating is a final and/or additional chance to find true and requited love, probably after many disappointing relationships.
After making 3 hubs about online dating facts, tips and statistics I decided to do some more research on the topic and try to find out how can someone create the perfect online dating profile or what can they do to stand out from the crowd and look unique.
In the following points I put emphasis on the most important things – so you can just run through the points when needed -, but provided some very useful, additional information with each point, so you can find everything completely explained as well.
One out of 10 users (so 10%!) are only present on dating sites to scam others.
How to choose the dating site you will use?
First of all, the most important thing is to find an online dating site which you can use. There are countless sites available on the internet, so this seems a very easy and fast job, but beware!
There is always a reason why the most popular and widely available sites are the top picks. It is true that probably these webpages spend the most on marketing and advertising themselves, but still there is one more important thing: these sites are the safest ones.
If you browse through sites you will probably run into many other pages that seem very promising as well, but the best idea is to stick with the well-known dating sites to make sure your data will be safe and handled correctly.
By typing ‘most popular online dating sites’ into Google you can easily get a quick overview on which are the above mentioned, most pages. At first glance match.com, PlentyOfFish, eHarmony, Singlesnet and okcupid almost always made to the top 10 lists, so I advise you to use one (or if you want - all) of these sites.
How to choose your username?
- Choose a username that best suits you.
- You can even be funny and choose a name that best describes you or one of your hobbies, favourites, your age, your birth date, etc. - like ‘PoetSam’, ‘Jane_75’.
- Never choose a name that can be misunderstood, or suggest something you are not or you do not intend to do. So avoid names like ‘EasyGirl’, ‘BedLover’, ‘TrueStud’ or ‘Casanova’. These may sound funny, but may also create a false picture of you (assuming you don’t want to look like an ‘EasyGirl’ or a’BedLover’ on purpose).
- Always keep in mind that this will be your screen name, so everyone who is interested in you will read this name and will probably get a basic idea about you based on it. You can lose many potential partners if they misunderstand your name.
- Try to stay natural - if you want to look/sound unique, do it with the content of your profile, but NEVER with your alias.
- If you are really unable to come up with a nice username, then use this online dating name generator – but always keep the upper mentioned advices in mind!
How to fill out the data required?
- NEVER lie. If you meet the potential partner in the future personally the truth will come out eventually! The sooner (if you lie about your weight, height or age) or later (if you lie about your relationship status, interests or profession) you will be completely unveiled.
- Many sites like match.com allow you to answer almost all the questions with choosing ‘I’d rather not say’. Well, although you are allowed to do this, you are not advised to. If you really want to find your better half on the site, you better give 100% true information about yourself. This way you will give yourself and others a bigger chance to find you on the site. There are many people who are not interested in people who already have kids, so allow them to cross you out from their potential partner list if they want to. There will be surely someone who will love the fact you have kids – and you don’t have to lie to achieve this!
- Do not ‘cosmetic’ your data either! If you know you have about 40 pounds to lose then do not choose you have a ‘Few pounds to lose’. This is also lying and will result in your date going home immediately after seeing you. Be correct and don’t feel ashamed who you are – you can still write into your profile that you are badly working on losing weight!
- NEVER create a long list of values/traits you want to or do not want to see in your potential partner. Only include a few things if it is really necessary, but keep in mind this may cross out several potential partners already! For example: someone might be a smoker and they want to meet you, but they don’t even dare to write a message as you strictly stated you don’t want to meet someone who is smoking. Who knows? This person might be trying to quit and they could be a perfect match for you if it weren’t for smoking! Additionally, adding too much values you don’t want to see in your partner may seem odd as these values were probably possessed by one of your previous partners in your past relationships – and I guess you don’t want to come across as a bitter, negative person by giving out everything about your past.
Would you think?
Most of people can’t represent themselves objectively when writing an online dating profile.
- NEVER leave blank spaces on your profile. If you do, this might seem like you don’t really want to ‘waste’ too much time on filling out essential parts of profile and you are only present on the site to hunt . Also, the more information, the bigger chance to find your perfect match!
- When you are asked to tell about your personality, but you can’t decide which word describes you the best, ask some of your friends and/or colleagues to ‘rate’ you. With their help you can choose the word that suits you the best!
- For questions like ‘What do you do for fun?’ try to give a precise and honest answer, do not exaggerate here either. Simply describe your hobbies and what you like to do. Lying about your interests will be unveiled sooner or later too!
- Where you are required/allowed to write about yourself a bit longer, don’t hesitate to write what you really think. Probably these sentences can provide the most information about their writers, so be positive, warm-hearted and honest. If you are unable to write something about yourself that may interest others, you can still ask one of your friends to help you out to find out your positive values. The better you describe yourself and the more specific you are, the bigger the chance your better half will find you as you will probably share some of these interests you listed. For example write: ‘I love pop music, Lady Gaga is one of my favourites!’ instead of ‘I enjoy listening to music’. See the difference? Try to be unique and say something about yourself that cannot be found on 99.9% of all online dating profiles!
Did you know?
Most of the people (about 70%) believe in love at first sight.
(So yeah, you better not be going out sloppy next time!)
- Avoid sentences that may contain any negativity or insecurity. Lines like ‘I don’t really know what I want to achieve in my life.’ suggest that even you don’t know who you are and what you want – how do you expect someone else to get to know you afterall?
- Stop complaining! This is also a huge turn-off for potential partners as you seem like you are a totally negative person! On your dating profile NEVER talk about your exes, never expose yourself totally (stay somewhat mysterious - what will remain to your partner otherwise?) and avoid sentences like ‘I don’t know why am I here’ or ‘A friend made me to sign up, so here I am’. Even if this is the truth you don’t have to tell this, rather write something about yourself that might REALLY interest others.
- If you think you are (and others also describe you as a) funny person, then don’t be afraid to use some delicate humour or say something funny about yourself! This might arouse interest in others.
- Usually, you are required to write a ‘Dating Headline’ for yourself. By keeping the upper discussed things in mind this should not be a problem! Write something that best describes you: something about yourself, your interests, your passions or simply, your favourite quote that somehow reflects who you are. Additionally, there are usually examples given, so you can get some inspiration on what to write.
- ALWAYS double-check what you wrote. Make sure you don’t have any serious grammar mistakes, incorrect spelling or sentences that can be misunderstood. Also, avoid things like: ‘I’m A fUnNy GuY’.
Books about Online Dating on Amazon
Did you know?
70% of online daters say that eyes are the sexiest facial feature on profile pictures.
Which photo to upload and set as profile picture?
- First of all, keep in mind: a simple picture can tell more about you than a 1000 words! Anyone can tell that an online dating profile with a picture is much more interesting and more people visit it than another with no pictures at all!
- Choose a picture where you can be clearly seen, the best if you have a face photo on which you are smiling (but not whinnying). Make sure the photo is not too old or outdated (you still have the same outlook now).
- Feel free to upload several photos if you are allowed to.
- Don’t be afraid to upload a picture where your full body shape can be seen. As we talked about, no lying, so you don’t have to feel awkward. If you will meet a potential partner, this will be the first thing they see anyway.
- If you want to upload a party shot or a picture with your friends make sure you can be clearly seen on it. This might indicate that you are a happy, funny and carefree person who is also very entertaining and loves to have fun (positive impression!). On the other hand, you better make sure nobody is more attractive on the group picture than you are :).
- NEVER upload pictures that might suggest something you are not. So never post pictures about your cleavage, butt or naked body parts.
- Add variety. If you want to upload more than one face shot then make sure you don’t look like the same on each of them (same face, clothes or posture).
- Try to upload good quality pictures. No one can see whether it is a nice photo of you if the picture is dark, has low resolution or all in all: has a terrible quality.
- NEVER upload a picture with your ex. This assumes you are still not over your previous love!
- Try to change your main photo every once in a while to keep it completely updated and to make sure you will add variety to your profile.
- All in all remember: never upload pictures that can make you feel embarrassed later! (Who knows, maybe your boss is signed up for that site too!)
Examples for terrible profile picturesClick thumbnail to view full-size
Sorry this hub became extremely long, I tried to keep it somewhat short, but I was unable to – everything is important in this topic. Also, I didn’t want to break the article into 2 parts, as that option seemed nonsense – how should I decide what to include in which part? :/
All in all, I hope I was able to give you some really good advice on how to stand out of the crowd and possess a unique dating profile.
Online dating profile tips on YouTube
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© Copyright 2012-2014, Zsofia Koszegi-Nagy (zsobig)
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