Why do some people settle for less than...in a relationship?

1. 61

   moneyfairyposted 11 years ago

   Why do some people settle for less than...in a relationship?
   
   Is it a self esteem thing or are they just very unhappy and choose to only take what they think they can get? I've seen some people choose to stay in boring mundane and sometimes unhappy relationships, so I am just wondering why someone would choose less than what they deserve? It's just sad.

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2. 76

   Moms-Secretposted 11 years ago

   I was never one to settle but I understand why people, both men and women do.  There is safety and security in what you know.  Change is an unknown.  The unknown is always perceived as a bigger risk than the known even when the known is a bad thing.
   Women - They know they are provided for, if that is the case.  They know they could afford to live with whom they live and where they live (esp. when children are involved).  It's better to deal with what they have instead of trying again and finding out they will only get exactly what they have now.  Who needs the extra disappointment.  This one already knows how they are, no need to invest the time to train another.  Etc.
   Men - is harder for me to speak for since I am not a man but have many male friends and can tell you what they have shared.  It is cheaper to keep her.  Why should I move out of something comfortable to struggle paying child support plus extra expenses to move into a small apartment.  If there are children and he is a good father there is the worry that the next person she choses can harm the children.  It' is just easier to ignore it and zone out.

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   1. 61

      moneyfairyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      You made some valid points. thanks!
      I just can't imagine settling and silently living in misery. I just wonder how others can manage being so unhappy and not doing anything to change that situation. Life is too short to be miserable.

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   2. 76

      Moms-Secretposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I feel the same way Moneyfairy.  I often find myself thinking life is too short for such nonsense but then there is so much more that I don't understand about people.

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3. 74

   lburmasterposted 11 years ago

   It might be to self esteem, or there is part of them they hide. They might need something in their life and they found it in their partner. For example, a few of my friends do not understand why I married David. But one important reason consists that he calms me down no matter what the situation is.

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   1. 61

      moneyfairyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      iburnmaster: Well he sounds like he is truly good for you. Also it's between you and him not your friends. I was just wondering about clearly unhappy couples who still stay together. It's just sad.

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