How can you tell if someone is really your friend?

Jump to Last Post 1-7 of 7 discussions (7 posts)
  1. The REAL JT profile image58
    The REAL JTposted 9 years ago

    How can you tell if someone is really your friend?

    Is it longevity? Wisdom? Kindness? What?

  2. jacobkuttyta profile image61
    jacobkuttytaposted 9 years ago

    It is a good question.  Who is my best friend.  The same question was asked to Jesus by one of the expert in the law. I would like to reproduce the story hereunder:

    The Parable of the Good Samaritan

    On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?"

    "What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?"

    He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'[c]; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

    "You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live."

    But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?"

    In reply Jesus said: "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead.  A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him.  He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him.  The next day he took out two silver coins[e] and gave them to the innkeeper. 'Look after him,' he said, 'and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.'

    "Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?"

    The expert in the law replied, "The one who had mercy on him."
          Jesus told him, "Go and do likewise."

    Now I hope you understand who is your best friend.
    Have many good friends.

  3. profile image0
    Hasifa101posted 9 years ago

    if you have to ask or wonder, they are probably not.

  4. lkeipp profile image56
    lkeippposted 9 years ago

    I have to agree with Hasifa on this one - if you have to question whether they are, or harbor any doubts about it, then likely they truly are not. 

    Friends act like friends - they don't back stab, or treat you like a bank, or a free place to sleep. They don't make the relationship one sided, and they will listen to anything you have to say, even if all they can do is listen.

  5. Riley's Outlook profile image66
    Riley's Outlookposted 8 years ago

    Longevity does not necessarily make a good friend.  Longevity means that both parties agree that their mutual company is something that is desired, wanted or needed depending whether the other was filling the void of companionship or that they just did not want to be alone.

    Wisdom is a great precursor for assessing friendship.  If a person is willing to give part of themselves by imparting knowledge (especially by what they have learned or experience),I would say you were on the right track.  On the other hand if the other was giving you their wisdom without your needing, wanting or without their truly listening to what your need were,  I would say that unfortunately they were giving you their time to make themselves feel good.

    Now were on to kindness, kindness is also an excellent nod that you and your friend are on the right track.  Being kind takes a lot of effort because it very often requires the sacrificing of time and the accessing of internal resources.

    And as for the what at the end of your question, I would say if you can look back on the "friendship" and can find mutual respect, care and honest to goodness good times, and can look to the present and future can see more of the same I can say in my humble opinion you may have a friend.
    Questioning your friendship if indeed it passes your test could be a matter of personal growth on your part or your friends or maybe both. Personal growth brings change of opinions, interests and attitudes. And this could be what you are experiencing.

    Hope this helps!

    Your friendly universal Riley

  6. profile image0
    reeltaulkposted 8 years ago

    you can and deep down you know.....it is the same as haing a good feeling about something.  That feeling never goes away because this person and the relationship that you have s consistent.  I will compare it to feeling safe or secure, you know that not only will they protect you from harm, they wont bring any to you.  As for longevity, it goes both ways, one person can't bring longevity to a relationship, it is a innocent give and take through bonding that brings longevity.  When you have a friend that makes you feel this way, be sure that they are indeed more than a friend (of course in a platonic way)

    Vonda G. Nelson

  7. Oldskool903 profile image74
    Oldskool903posted 8 years ago

    If you have feelings for him/her. For example the feeling of comfort when your around the person. Ask yourself am I being myself around these people. If you are and your true personality is showing your probably with the people you love. And also ask yourself if you have fun around your friends, and are they there for you if something happens. Friends can't just be judged on one aspect, but these questions you should ask yourself should help out.

 
working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)