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Need help with my confidence and if this girl wants to go out with me
ok heres the deal, i met this girl over the summer but she was already in a relationship, since september shes been single, and ive gradually been hanging out with her but im crushing on her and i become very quiet with girls i like. the highlight of this was i stayed over her house and i slept with her, nothing sexual besides cuddling. but lately some guy has been hitting on her but she said shes not into him. but i feel my chance at being with her is falling away. can someone tell me what to do to get her with me. because i actually like her, shes always on my mind
Whats the worse that can happen? gettin rejected or hating yourself for not going after her when you had the chance. Just dont act desperate, just let her know that you want to be Her Mr. Right if only she gives you a chance. You cant force someone to be in a relationship with you but no one said that should stop you from askin anyways. Good luck, man up and go after her. After all dont you think you can make her smile? keep her happy?
It's not uncommon to go a little quiet around the girl you like, but you do need to find a way to work up some courage to tell her your feelings if you feel your chance is starting to fall away. If you don't do this she may put you in the 'friend' category. There are little gesures you can do which will show her how you're feeling, without using words too, such as arriving with flowers. This can bring an element of romance to your relationship. From what you've said here, it doesn't seem like you're losing her at this point though, afterall you spend a night cuddling her, not the other guy. But when are you going give her a kiss? That seems like what could be the next step for you to take, rather than worrying about what the other guy is up to.
Let her know you are interested in her as a person -- not just a romantic conquest. Ask her questions that give her an opening to talk about herself without your appearing to be too nosey. These do not have to be really personal questions at first -- maybe something as simple as commenting on your favorite food if you are eating together and asking her what she likes best. Never ask simple yes or no questions, but open-ended ones. If she's talking, you won't have to. Woman love good listeners. Show you are listening to her by starting your responses with words like "You mean you feel....." or "So you think that..." This will also let her to know you want to really understand her, and will probably also put the conversational ball back into her court. If you really are interested in what's she's saying, that will show, and being listened to draws a woman much closer than having to listen to a man talk about himself, unless he's answering a question she asked. Emotional closeness usually leads over time to physical closeness.
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