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When me and my siblings were children and teens, we often wished our parents would get a divorce. They were always fighting and our home felt like a war-zone. But they never did, they stayed together through thick and thin, and are now happily enjoying their 50s.
Now, we are so glad that they stuck it through. When me and my husband are going through a rough patch I always think of my parents and how they didn't quit. They are my heroes and the best examples a child could have.
Yes, if you want to be unhappy. No, if you want to move on and open to the possibilities of a happier existence, either single or with another.
On the other hand it may be a situation where your marriage is growing, and that growth is painful. Sometimes when life situations are painful we are moving beyond an old way of being, and if we stick with it we come out the other end in a more real place. But if both partners are willing and interested to keep trying, often we will get through the difficult periods and come to a deeper intimacy in the relationship.
From another angle, I think many people stay in an unhappy marriage because despite the pain, there is comfort in maintaining things the way there are. We all do this in different ways, and it's not necessarily easy to move on from a situation that is unhealthy. There is a lot of painful feelings that can come up when we have to end it with someone, and nobody wants to face those feelings.
At the end of the day it's really something each person has to work out for themselves. Maybe the marriage just needs some work, and you could save it with relationship counseling, or maybe if it continues to be unhappy you'll eventually realize that you need to move on.
It's a very personal journey, and each person has to find their way forward. All the best to you and may you find happiness on your path.
The first thing you should ask yourself is what is it that your unhappy about. Many people make the mistake of ending really good marriages just because the fail to pinpoint the real cause.
by Dawn Michael8 years ago
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