Would you snitch on a guy who was fooling around?
Guy starts online/phone/sexual relationship with vulnerable, lonely married woman who'd never had affair. She is flattered & swept away by his passion. He'd been staying temporarily with a girl he called a 'friend' during a time of unemployment. Married woman finds out he actually slept with girl who was 'friend', he admitted it. Maried woman then realized guy using girl for a meal ticket while fooling around with her on side. She is very ashamed, ends it. She knows how to contact the 'meal ticket girl'. Should she tell her? Meal ticket girl lists her FB status as "in a relationship". NOT!
yes?...........................................................................
It sounds to me like he is in a live in relationship with the girl he says he's temporarily staying with as a 'friend'. He said he's only slept with her once - but they are living at the same address and like you said her Facebook Status says 'In a relationship' so it's more than likely they truly are a couple and that while she's not at home he's being a love rate on the internet/phone. You say he picked a married lonely women who wouldn't have an affair - then what was she doing indulging with him over the phone over a period of time? Maybe he's not satisfied in his relationship but he hasn't picked a single women to flirt with, he chose someone who is already attached, so it sounds like he's having a bit (or trying to have a bit) on the side. As there was no 'real life' time together, I'd say no need to dob him in - unless he sent some incredibly juicy email that you want her to see. You don't know for sure what their relationship is like, or what state it's in, so best just to let it go (Hope married women learns from this experience).
The fact in this situation is that the guy who was staying at the girl's house "temporarily" had a previous relationship with her, or so he said, 2 years ago. Now when he was pursuing the married woman, he first said he hadn't been with the woman for 2 years..then let it slip that she wanted to know why they 'hadn't had sex for a while'... then admitted he'd had sex with her "two weeks ago". So the woman he's romancing on the phone sees the warning signs, but is so flattered and needy, she pushes it to the side & continues with the relationship. Eventually, after several ups, downs, silences, a couple of 'ending it sessions' then starting back up again, (an emotional roller coaster with him) she realizes what it really was. He was using the woman for a meal ticket while he fooled around with her on the side, throwing her crumbs so she'd want the cake later. In addition, he was somewhat manipulative. So now, this married lady who has left it behind and regained the validity of her marriage (she had never had an affair before) has struggled with whether to tell meal ticket lady what a cad he really is. You are right. She doesn't know what his relationship with the meal ticket woman was really like or if he's still staying there or not, he was very evasive about it. Though facts point to the possibility he's NOT there now but in a nearby city. Regardless, it's been a wild ride. My opinion? I say leave it all alone and hope that meal ticket lady finds out what a cad he is and dumps him, though he doesn't consider her a permanent fixture anyway. She may be clinging to hope alone.
If you are prepared for the possible backlash and/or denials, then it depends on how you feel about the people involved.
You know the truth about this person now, telling the other woman involved may or maynot make you feel better. You don't have to go out of your way to tell her anything she will eventually know if he is stringing her along, and the blame will be his totally, not yours. He is probably very good at lying and not everyone wants to hear the truth, so you may be left the villian of the piece here.
It's not my place to tell on someone who is doing what they want; if it's unpleasing to me; it maybe pleasing to another.
Each is free to decide what is acceptable and unacceptable.
I would leave this business to the parties who really matter, I have my own relationship and life to attend to.
The whole of telling about what someone else did the whole widens and I fall as well.
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