I need advice. Me and a man have been dating for two weeks. He says he is crazy about me and I...
am. "the one." This week his mom went into the hospital. She is dying. I supported him with phone calls and texts. He was very open and talked about what he felt, also saying he needed me. Last night, he texted once saying things were hectic. I texted back saying I was there for him but it had hurt my feelings that he had not let me know how he or his mom was doing. Today I received a text saying,"it bothers me that you are worried about your feelings when my mom is dying...wtf" I apologized and explained I was worried. He said he will talk to me later. Do I leave him alone? Do I amswer if he
Wow....his mom is dying and your upset he is upset with you? Put yourself in his shoes, the person that gave him life is dying. The person who raised him and nurtured him. This is not a minor technical detail this is a devastating event in his life. Give him his space, allow him to grieve, allow him to cope. Right now his world is probably upside down and he's angry at the universe. From a guys perspective especially if they were close this wound won't heal right away. However you can be a lending ear, be that support when he does need you, be that shoulder to lean on when he feels like he's falling. Also taking into the fact you have been together for two weeks doesn't mean he doesn't trust you, but perhaps he wasn't ready to accept the fact that his mom was moving on or he has been preoccupied by it. Walk a mile in his shoes before you take a step in yours. Just my two cents though, I do wish you the best either way.
ok first of all, he shouldn't of said wtf. yes you do need to leave him alone, but i mean with the text messages that is. you need to get up and go see him. he needs a friend right now more than anything. the only reason he was being the way he was is because of he is obviouly stressed out. if he calls you before you get a chance to do this, tell him you're buissy and then go and suprise him. when you get there go up to him and give him the biggest hug ever!
I don't know if surprising him is a good idea right now, your not living in some teen drama like The OC or Dawsons Creek! He has a Hell of a lot on his plate right now, take it from someone who has lost a parent, the best thing you can do for him is to be there when HE needs you, It sounds like you want to him to validate your feelings, but there's more important things going on in his life right now than you. That may sound harsh, but it's just the way it is, if he says things in anger that upset you, try to remember that he is going through something huge, and he needs your support! Ask him what he wants, just tell him you're there for him if he needs you. That way if he wants to talk he knows he can, and if he wants to be alone then he doesn't have to worry about hurting your feelings. Don't forget that dealing with someone elses problems can be hard too though, he has his own stuff to deal with, and If you cant handle the pressure or the reality of the situation then its probably best to cut your ties, it doesn't make you a bad person, we all have to take care of ourselves once in a while, and you arent a trained shrink! (Just for god's sake let him down gently!!!!)
Hope that helps, LF x
yeah i think there wasn't an agreement on what your situation is. Imagine if you were in his position and he did the same thing to you. how would you react?
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