Ladies, what advice would you give a young lady about dating?

Jump to Last Post 1-18 of 18 discussions (30 posts)
  1. Stevennix2001 profile image82
    Stevennix2001posted 12 years ago

    Well ladies, if you knew of a young girl that was going out on her first date. Let's just say she's 12, then what advice would you give her about her first date?  please discuss.  by the way, this has nothing to do with me or anyone that i know. i just like reading your posts, as i do get a kick out of them, as most of you probably know about me by now. big_smile

    1. annb106 profile image60
      annb106posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      To be honest; I don't think that a 12 year old should be going on a date or anything else. I realize that kids are doing that but, they should be focusing on being a child.

      1. princess g profile image59
        princess gposted 12 years agoin reply to this

        Agreed, twelve is way too young

    2. profile image53
      hub page contribuposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      I would go somewhere public and meet the person there (instead of having him pick her up).  If she's dependent on him to take her home, what if he doesn't want to take her, he's been drinking, etc.?

      I would go out during the day, maybe for lunch, on the weekend.  A lot of men expect sex at the end of the date - but he doesn't tell her that when he asks her out) and he often wants to spend the night at her place or he wants to drive her to his place.  If you meet for lunch, you can always say you have plans in the afternoon, evening, etc.

      Don't leave your drink unattended.  A lot of men put something in the other person's drink which makes the woman incapacitated.

      I know it sounds paranoid but these things have happened to countless women.  Someone young and inexperienced in life may not know that these things happen and sometimes they find out after they've been done to the woman.

  2. psycheskinner profile image83
    psycheskinnerposted 12 years ago

    At twelve?  I would not encourage romantic style dating at that age. Just 'group of friends' activities.

    1. Stevennix2001 profile image82
      Stevennix2001posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      yeah, good point.  besides, many girls are often naive about dating around that age anyway, so it would be easy for a boy to try to take advantage of them.

      1. shaekelly profile image64
        shaekellyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

        Its funny you should ask that question, I can definitely give her advice, I've just published the hub entitled" 10 Signs: He Is Mr. Wrong, I also have older hubs 10 Ways to Know If He Is Into You, and 10 Ways to Know If He Is Just Not That Into You. tell her to check them out. Even if she doesn't read the hubs I, advice her to be very selective, pay attention, and be very careful in dating.

  3. psycheskinner profile image83
    psycheskinnerposted 12 years ago

    Keeping them in a group activities framework allows some harmless crushes if they are at that stage without letting it get too far.

    1. Stevennix2001 profile image82
      Stevennix2001posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      again, another good point

  4. profile image0
    klarawieckposted 12 years ago

    Lock her in her room until she's eighteen! lol

    1. Stevennix2001 profile image82
      Stevennix2001posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      lollollollol that could work. lol tongue

    2. annb106 profile image60
      annb106posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      That sounds like a winner to me. They should be enjoying being a child and not rush into anything else. When they rush into adult things, they can't get the child things back.

    3. princess g profile image59
      princess gposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      This is the best idea yet:)

  5. Lifeallstar1 profile image60
    Lifeallstar1posted 12 years ago

    Twelve is young but I remember being twelve and going on a date. My mother suggested we go with a group of friends to the movies. That's what we basically did. The movies and out to eat. We also went bowling! Woo Hoo! It took the pressure off of us and our parents wink So I suggest a young lady at the age of twelve definitely go on a group date and it doesn't even have to be all couples.

    Why are you really asking though? big_smile

    1. Stevennix2001 profile image82
      Stevennix2001posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      eh, just bored and twelve was a random number that i thought up at the top of my head.  lol.

  6. hanging out profile image61
    hanging outposted 12 years ago

    How about... marry the fellah after you both graduate university.

  7. titobay profile image71
    titobayposted 12 years ago

    Twelve is rather young to be out on a date. If she must, she would be better of with a group of positive minded friends, remember, peer groups do have influence on children at that age and if she messes up with the wrong group, she might end up on the wrong lane. So going out with groups that the parents can trust is very important. Also the choice of venue is important, nothing cozy and sexual. Sexual imagination arouses early these days among children due to technology and social media so parents need to be on top of family affairs to prevent children from derailing. Once she decides to embark on dates, mother-daughter communication becomes highly essential essential from this moment.

  8. Nell Rose profile image89
    Nell Roseposted 12 years ago

    Hi, Tell her not to bother! I always say, you spend half your life trying to find the man of your dreams, and the rest of the time trying to get rid of him! lol

    1. profile image0
      klarawieckposted 12 years agoin reply to this


    2. Lifeallstar1 profile image60
      Lifeallstar1posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I don't think anyone is going to be able to top that advice! big_smile

  9. Internetwriter62 profile image76
    Internetwriter62posted 12 years ago

    Make sure the date is in a safe environment like your home or his parent's home. Make sure it is a daytime date and try to advice your daughter not to engage in any sexual activities.

  10. profile image0
    jca197493@yahoo.cposted 12 years ago

    I have two boys. My oldest is 15 and it is tough watching them date and all the worries that come with it. I believe having a strong  relationship with your child helps. They need to understand the concept of dating and how they should respect themselves and others. Boy or girl they need to have a parent take the time to talk to them.

  11. couturepopcafe profile image60
    couturepopcafeposted 12 years ago

    No one's mentioned sex.  Yes, 12 is too young but when the age is right, let's say 18, young males are interested in the hunt and conquest.  Young females need to know that penis is the enemy until she is married or old enough to know about life.
    Men may not get this, but having sex without love is a big self esteem crusher.  Women cannot separate sex from love in their minds so every encounter without love is potentially devastating even if she pretends it isn't.  It will catch up to her.

  12. ediggity profile image59
    ediggityposted 12 years ago

    If you're crazy enough to let her go on a date at 12, don't be surprised when she comes back pregnant with your first grandchild.

  13. profile image52
    MollyKateposted 12 years ago

    12 I'd say is a bit young for actual dating. I had a so called bf at around 12 but it is more like hanging out as friends with a group of friends but never unsupervised. Hand holding was the big deal. But also when I say Supervised i don't mean parents following them around 2 steps behind or making them sit in the same room all the time with them, they also need you to trust them a little too.  Be involved and take them to the movies, mall, putt-putt or whatever during the day and be there just not lingering right there.   Then meet them at x time at x spot.  Give them a little space but let them know the boundaries "Rules" and consequences for unappropriate behavior upfront and follow-through if necessary. Normally, at that age it is more hanging out and socializing than any thing else.  Also, it is a good idea to get to know the bf or gf, invite them over for dinner or watch a movie.  Ask questions afterward, for example about the movie? who was there? if it is a group event. etc...
    As for dating it was not allowed till I was 16 and same for my friends.  I will say that the girls with the strictest parents were the ones that were the most rebellious and got into the most trouble.

  14. krystalsmith profile image60
    krystalsmithposted 12 years ago

    Although I agree with most people on here that ideally a 12 year old would not be dating, I also know that 12 year olds DO date and to try to force them not to will only damage your relationship with them. So assuming that she's already decided to go down that path I would tell her to have fun, discuss with her the consequences and risks of some actions and encourage her to set definite boundaries that she will not cross. The main thing would be to encourage her to talk with me when she got back, I would want to make sure she felt she had a mature adult she could tell everything to and get advice from. Not that I would be her "friend" and never tell her her actions were wrong, but I would want her to be able to be honest and open with me so that I could give her the guidance that she will need and that I wish I could've had. (I had a mother who said it's bad, don't do it, and assumed I never snuck out at night, I had zero guidance and when bad things happened, I had noone to talk to.)

  15. Pamela N Red profile image76
    Pamela N Redposted 12 years ago

    Kids mature at different levels but I agree with the others that said twelve is way too young. They should enjoy their youth as long as possible.

    Start them out in group settings with other kids. Have her boyfriend come over and watch a movie or play a game with adult supervision.

    Make sure you discuss sex and let her know that you should wait for a special guy and not give yourself to just anyone. Make sure she has access to condoms even if you don't think she is sexually active. Even if she is on oral contraceptives that won't protect her from STD's

    Don't be naive and assume just because you told her to remain celibate that nothing will happen.

  16. Greek One profile image62
    Greek Oneposted 12 years ago

    1. All men are stinky
    2. Keep your legs crossed
    3. Keep your mouth crossed
    4. If they say "that never happened before.."  They are lying
    5. Marry rich

  17. bornblond8dg profile image61
    bornblond8dgposted 11 years ago

    I honestly do not believe that the age of 12 is appropriate to start dating,  what does your parents say about that?  I don't believe in simply dating casually,  unless you are ready to search for a future marriage partner what's the real purpose in dating?Sorry guys i'm speaking from having been divorced, so i'm sure you can proboly understand my perspective on this.

  18. TLMinut profile image60
    TLMinutposted 11 years ago

    Make sure she knows that telling a boy no and having him stop does NOT mean the issue won't come up again - it doesn't mean that particular boy is safe from then on.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)