Is sex a necessity in premarital relationship? If yes or no, please let me know

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  1. vwealth profile image61
    vwealthposted 11 years ago

    Is sex a necessity in premarital relationship? If yes or no, please let me know why.

  2. Kaniel Loughran profile image59
    Kaniel Loughranposted 11 years ago

    Absolutely. When you get married you are making a life long commitment (ideally). If you are not sexually compatible with your partner, if you cannot share a home/apartment and bed together, you will not have any idea what you are getting involved with. You might find yourself married for a year wishing you had been with someone that better suited your physical evolutionary needs. Religion can prove demanding on this aspect as marriage was quite different when they created it, however. Ask yourself if it is wiser to understand every aspect of your mate before you commit to marriage, or if it is easier to get a divorce, split everything, get a new apartment, new stuff, try and find someone who is interested in a divorced man/woman, take care of a kid from your marriage if you have one, etc.?

  3. dustbunnie profile image59
    dustbunnieposted 11 years ago

    From a female point of view i would say yes. Even though Sex isnt the only part of a relationship, it is still however a part of it. If your not sexually compatible with your spouse it will only lead to cheating, hurt feelings and eventually divorce. And who needs all that hurt and ugliness in their life. And then if you put children into the mix, well then your messing with their lives. I mean lets face it no one wants to be a weekend mommy or daddy. Simply I dont think testing the milk so to speak before you buy it hurts anything smile

  4. Daffy Duck profile image59
    Daffy Duckposted 11 years ago

    A necessity is something you literally can't live without.  Everyone can go on living without sex, it's just a matter of respecting others and controlling your urges.

    If you can't judge or talk to your partner as to how they are during sex then you're not working at it.  You don't need to have sex in order to know if you will be compatible or not.

  5. Ashantina profile image60
    Ashantinaposted 11 years ago

    I disagree with Daffy Duck.
    Although sex 'may not' be a necessity. It is a necessary ingredient which ranks alongside Trust, Respect, Good Communication and Love which are all vital to the stability of any relationship.
    And yes you do need to have sex in order to KNOW that you are both compatible sexually. If not it will cause problems. As will the omission of any of the other ingredients mentioned above......
    To Daffy Duck: One can go without sex, but we're talking about relationships aka two people. How about if one partner has a high sex drive? How do you suggest a couple deal with that...?

  6. JMAW profile image59
    JMAWposted 11 years ago

    i don't think marriage is necessary...  i am pro life-long relationship but as for marriage, i don't need a contract to symbolize love.  but i can see why it's appealing to many.  i had a girlfriend who only felt love if we got married.  i wasn't pro of that so it changed my view on marriage i suppose.

  7. PainReliefGuy profile image57
    PainReliefGuyposted 11 years ago


    If you truly love someone then sex is just an added benefit, not the main attraction. There are plenty of ways to satiate your physical and emotional needs without resorting to sex.

    Besides, once you're married sex likely disappears quickly anyways (a side effect of wedding cake) smile.

    So, tis best to go without, so you don't know what you're missing and therefore save yourself disappointment if the sex only happens on holidays, birthdays and "let's have a baby" cycles.

  8. profile image0
    klarawieckposted 11 years ago

    Everyone should have sex before getting married. That's the only way to know if you are truly compatible. Intimacy is a huge part of the relationship and why would anyone want to share their life with someone they might not be compatible in bed with?

  9. Jowy2000 profile image95
    Jowy2000posted 11 years ago

    Necessity to some, and not to others. And I think it's absolutely essential that those 2 types of people don't try to have a relationship. Sex is a huge part of a relationship and if the 2 individuals involved have incompatible preferences it could cause very drastic damage to the relationship.

    This isn't to say that sex is necessarily incredibly important, it's just that compatible preferences with sex are incredibly important.

  10. nightwork4 profile image60
    nightwork4posted 11 years ago

    i would never marry a woman if we didn't have sex first. just imagine if your a horny person and you marry someone who wants sex just for making babies or even just a rare thing to do. sex is one of the things that bring couples closer plus it's so awesome why wouldn't a person want to enjoy it?

  11. vwealth profile image61
    vwealthposted 11 years ago

    Well, Dustbunnie; if this test, that test. What will be left to buy? As for me; I think having sex before marriage is an issue to be resolved verbally and not necessarily by action.
    At least, if you love someone, you should be ready to sacrifice anything to keep your love alive.

  12. dashingscorpio profile image84
    dashingscorpioposted 11 years ago

    The main difference between a "platonic relationship" and a "monogamus relationship" is sexual intimacy.
    There are many people in platonic relationships with someone they "secretly" have romantic feelings for.

    Is sex a "necessity" in premarital relationships?
    Clearly the answer is NO. People from all over the world have historically gotten married without having sex and continue to do so. The real question is, Is it smart to marry someone you have never had sex with?

    "Sexual incompatibility" is among many things listed as a cause for adultery or unhappiness in a marriage. I personally could not imagine marrying someone I had never had sex with.
    It’s a mistake to believe “communication” will automatically lead to “action”
    Finding out your partner has no desire or is unwilling to do things you desire after you marry them can lead to regret. Whenever possible it’s always best to have an idea of what you’re getting into before you exchange vows.

    It’s politically correct to "publicly" downplay (the  true significance) of sex, passion, and romance in marriages. However in reality if you and your mate (are not on the same page) when it comes to sex one or both of you will not be “happily married”.


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