How can victims of domestic violence better protect themselves from the real danger in their life?
First off you have to tell...someone what is going on. You have to let someone know you are a victim. There are agencies out there to protect victims that go so far as to hide you and protect you while helping you to get control of your life. don't despair and get in a church where you can meet people that care and will pray with you.
Get a dad like mine who will not only protect you but teach you how to protect yourself. Such as how to shoot a gun, use a knife, and some self defense moves that will undoubtedly stun your attacker long enough for you to run like the wind.
Also tell someone you trust will help you! Family is normally a good idea but if you cant tell them tell friend or a classmate/coworker.
Also If (and you should) report the abuse, take photo's of the injuries. If you get threatening text messages or e-mails ... print them out. DO NOT EDIT THEM! Just hit print page! If its a text save them and show them to the person (officer) you are reporting it to.
I agree with Naomi. It's so important that you tell someone what is happening to you. There are several amazing programs available that provide both emotional support as well as a safe haven to those women are victims of domestic violence. And most importantly (in my opinion), know that there is a life to be had after you leave your situation. I too am a domestic abuse survivor and my life truly began after I started to love myself enough to leave
The first step is to learn to love yourself.
Unless you get to this point you will never feel or believe you deserve to have a better life.
"When we change our circumstances change."
Sometimes this means allowing yourself to get pissed off! Once you get to this point you will be Driven to find solutions to your problems. You do the google searches to find services in your area, check with your clergy if attend church,and local police stations to find free or low cost therapy to work on yourself.
However the first step is to physically get out of the situation even if that means finding a shelter. Next you want to find someone who was in your position and turned their life around. Each of us needs a mentor or inspiration from time to time.
Best of luck!
I feel that if I had listened to my heart instead of my husband, I would've made better choices. I was trying to divorce my husband over a drug habit that changed him. Even if I had a PO order, he still would've come to my job and shot me. I don't know what could've been done differently to be honest.
Joellenv
I agree with everyone that it is important to tell someone that it is happening to you. However, one of the issues with telling someone is that it can be difficult to tell someone. Also, when victims of domestic violence or abuse do tell someone, it is common for others to make up excuses or not believe the victim. Then when a victim of domestic abuse does tell, it is also common to hear people say, "why don't you just leave?"
The fact is that leaving is often the most dangerous time for the victim of the abuse. This is when the most violence occurs. It is important for the victim to have a safety plan before "just leaving". The perpetrator often uses powerful manipulation tactics to scare the victim from leaving or in believing there is no where to go. Perpetrators function off of power and control, which outsiders typically don't see.
So, to answer you question, yes there are things that victims can do to protect themselves. The first being community resources. There are a lot of organizations that have crisis lines and other free services to help victims. If you need a place to stay, try google searching for domestic violence shelters or centers. Contacting your local police department can help also. Contact a friend or family member that you truly trust to hold on to your important documents and money that you may need in an emergency. If you are no longer living with the abuser, make sure you tell neighbors of any possible danger, what to look out for, and if they hear strange noises from your home to call the authorities. Install an alarm system, you can even purchase door and window alarms from your local home goods store if you cannot afford a monitored alarm system.
Some important things to keep in mind:
If you hear a neighbor in distress, don't hesitate to call.
*Also, If you hear of or witness an animal being abused report it immediately. The link between animal abuse/violence and domestic violence (or violent crimes in general) are huge. Chances are if the individual is abusing animals, they are likely to be committing other crimes as well.
Domestic violence and abuse knows no boundaries as far as family/individual income, education, socioeconomic status, gender, sexuality, race, etc. It is a myth that domestic abuse only occurs in low income households. It can happen to anyone. If you have more questions, feel free to ask me.
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