Does a big age difference doom a relationship when the woman is older?

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  1. plinka profile image53
    plinkaposted 12 years ago

    Does a big age difference doom a relationship when the woman is older?

    Some people refers to younger men in such relationships as "toyboy lovers". Is it degrading or is it just exact? Is the age difference an obstacle in a relationship when the wife's age gap from her husband is great?

  2. My Footprints profile image60
    My Footprintsposted 12 years ago

    Obviously. In my country age does matter particularly for women. Its frown upon when women are seen with younger man.

  3. profile image0
    Arlene V. Pomaposted 12 years ago

    It depends on the couple.  An older woman could tire of having a boy toy.  If she feels like his mother or feels like she is supporting him, that's the end of that.  Flip this subject to an older man having a young woman in a relationship, we think nothing of it!  All relationships involve risk.

  4. Cassie Smith profile image60
    Cassie Smithposted 12 years ago

    Well the greater the age difference the harder it is to have a relationship when it's a younger man and an older woman.  However, it really depends on the couple.  I've seen long marriages when the age gap was at least 7 years.  I think it really has more to do with the relationship and the commitment to keep it going rather than the age difference.

  5. wychic profile image84
    wychicposted 12 years ago

    I only have direct experience with the other way around -- my husband is 27 years older than I am. However, my brother-in-law is married to a woman about 25 years older than himself, and they've been married for 30 years. They're the only real experience I have with the flip side. Personally, I think that every relationship has its fair share of challenges, and I think that an age-gap relationship in which the woman is older is no more doomed to failure than any other. However, I think it does rely heavily on the respective maturity levels of the people involved (again, much like any other relationship) and if she feels herself being pushed into a mother role then it may not end well.

  6. ComfortB profile image85
    ComfortBposted 12 years ago

    Most marriages I know where the woman is older have actually lasted longer(like 2 decades), or still ongoing.

  7. rambansal profile image61
    rambansalposted 12 years ago

    With woman of higher age, the relationship must last longer for the woman becoming more careful about the relationship.

  8. dashingscorpio profile image80
    dashingscorpioposted 12 years ago

    Honestly with a divorce rate of 50% it doesn't appear to be any "magic formula" one can hang their hat upon and say this will work or this will not work...etc
    Some people stay together (no matter what happens) during their marriage and others have more "deal breakers" than there are stars in the sky. They're ready to walk out in a heartbeat.
    If neither person cares what other people think about their relationship they have a good chance at making things work assuming neither has a change of heart over unforeseen issues which may arise in the future. Terms such as "boy-toy" or "trophy-wife" are seldom used by the people in those relationships. These comments most often come from those sitting in the peanut gallery.

  9. patbess profile image58
    patbessposted 12 years ago

    I have lot of friends whom are dating older woman and their relationship is doing great. Like a lot of people have said in the previous answers, there is truly no recipe for love.

  10. profile image0
    Hubertsvoiceposted 12 years ago

    Just an opinion, if the reason that the affair began still exists the difference will not matter. A lasting relationship has nothing to do with age. If a love affair is endangered by words of other people then tat affair was built a very weak foundation. Love affairs that last a lifetime are built on the needs of the soul, not of the flesh. A love affair that is begun in the heat of passion rarely survives the heat of hot flashes.

  11. profile image0
    ExoticHippieQueenposted 12 years ago

    Most of the time, a very large age gap causes problems, but many couples with age differences of up to 10 years seem to have no problems that are related to their ages.  I don't think that it's degrading for a woman to have a younger lover. Sometimes, it just happens that way.

  12. Self Tweaker profile image61
    Self Tweakerposted 11 years ago

    I think one of the problems when asking these types of questions is that people want a 'standard' or some type of systematized answer that's going to work for all.

    The real answer is that it depends on the people involved.  I don't believe that age has anything to do with it at all.  If two adults truly find love, then discriminating factors such as age, race, or gender should not be factors.

    I've been happily married to my wife for a number of years now.  I make the most money, I have the final say in the household, and we are madly in love.

    She is also 11 years older than I am.


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