What are the best ways to re-gain self esteem after a traumatic relationship situations?
After being with my first proper boyfriend for 3 years, we lived together for 2 & a half of which, i literally fell apart as he ended it xmas day. I don't know how i regained self esteem but in all honesty it has taken me 3 years to fully get it back. I started by doing the things that made me and only me happy. I didnt think about boys, i slowly started going out with friends again. I joined the gym, worked out 5 nights a week (but this was due to my over comfort eating) There's no magical cure but i promise it will get easier a time goes on. I thought my heart would never mend. But nearly 4 years later i have met someone who is simply wonderful
self forgiveness and acceptance are the first steps. appreciating yourself too helps. surrounding yourself with supportive people. it's painful but it helps. i actually hubbed something about forgiveness and letting go.
I know people can live a more free and satisfying life when they forgive and let go. It can do wonders for the soul!
Self forgiveness is a good key, it ended for a reason, thats just the way i look at it. It kills at the time, but as they say, time is a healer
What a tough question to answer! and I hope that you are asking this from a theortical point of view and not from your personal experience.
If my current partner would leave me I would totally and utterly fall apart. I am actually making a real effort here to imagine this worst case scenario. I know from previous experiences that after a time of despair I would get my bum into gear and I would drag myself out of that hell.
First of all I would get my appearance sorted: hairdresser, new clothes and a lot of exercise. Then I would declutter my house: burning anything that reminds me of him. Then I would look in the mirror and acknowledge everything that is good about me. Then I would ask my family and friends if they think that something is wrong with me and if this was the case I'd work on improving myself.
Finally, would curse a lot, stick a Limp Bizkit CD on and tell the "curse, curse" to go to hell.
Your 'Team Leader'
I was with my ex since the age of 15, married for more than 17 years, and had two teenage sons, 16 & 13 at the time, I discovered he was gay. After learning he had been with a male member of my family. (no blood relation to him) That was in 2008, and I am only now recovering. I was so in love with him and he was my best friend, so losing him was very much like a death for me. I sought therapy, wrote and write a lot, and went back to school. I struggle and struggled with feelings of being betrayed, but ultimately it was forgiving him and making peace with it and him, that allowed me to heal. My self-esteem suffered (ego) because I never had much of one to begin with...only I wasn't aware of that until I was no longer with him. Funny what love blinds us to, or from. "I never knew I had a choice" is the book I read that truly allowed me to see my worth. I hope it will help...
I have a new article coming up very soon that may help: Recovery from a Narcissistic Relationship.
Taking up a hobby, study course or sport you've always wanted to try is a great way to rebuild your self-esteem after the end of a relationship, it also allows you to mix with new people, so you can make a fresh start.
by S Lynn Mitchell 2 years ago
Do you think promiscuity and low self-esteem go hand in hand?I have seen many woman randomly give their most precious possession (their bodies) to anyone that would take it. I'm not one to police ANYONE'S sex life, but I can't understand why a woman would risk pregnancy, communicable diseases, and...
by Damanee 3 years ago
Is it a good idea to fall in love, when your self esteem is low?Often times we fall in love, because the person of our dream (often pretending) make us feel good about ourselves. They could be during this because they want something from us.
by jkchandra 6 years ago
Why do women stay in relationships that are rocky with husbands that repeatedly abuses them
by ii3rittles 6 years ago
How do I stop feeling unattractive and stop fearing my fiance' will find someone better?I have always had self-esteem issues. They aren't as bad as they use to be but they are bothering me again because my fiance is going to some concert thing (Rover's Morning Glory) and I know there will be women...
by steffsings 8 years ago
I was recently studying Mark 12:28-31 which calls us to Love God with our whole being, AND ALSO to love our fellow man "as ourself". How can someone who does NOT love themselves (low self esteem) treat others well? SIMILAR ISSUE: Can we be both humble and also have enough love for...
by Moira Garcia Gallaga 4 years ago
Any tip to help teenage girls overcome insecurities and build self esteem?
Copyright © 2018 HubPages Inc. and respective owners. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. HubPages® is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc. HubPages and Hubbers (authors) may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, Google, and others.
|HubPages Device ID||This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.|
|Login||This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.|
|HubPages Traffic Pixel||This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.|
|Remarketing Pixels||We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.|
|Conversion Tracking Pixels||We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.|