How do you deal with any mean, rude behavior of family members?

1. 69

   lovesleftoversposted 12 years ago

   How do you deal with any mean, rude behavior of family members?
   
   I'm finding that the older I get, the less patience I have with rude, mean people. At one time I would just ignore a snarky, snide comment, even if it hurt my feelings. Now I'm quicker to speak up for myself, but it doesn't always go over so well- particularly with family members. I'm wondering if it's just easier to go back to ignoring the comments. Or, perhaps I should just avoid snarky relatives altogether?

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2. 71

   dashingscorpioposted 12 years ago

   My vote is to avoid rude and negative people if at all possible. Life is short!
   You can't control what another person does but (you can control who you spend your time with). Just because someone is a family member does not give them a "free pass" to treat you like crap! One man's opinion! :-)
   
   It's been said, "Friends are the family you choose".

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3. 71

   backporchstoriesposted 12 years ago

   Unless they are my children, rude behavior does not get my attention.  Those members, I will not feed into their insecurities.

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4. 69

   Ellana317posted 12 years ago

   This is a good question...  I say continue to speak up for yourself.  If you don't speak up for yourself the behavior will persists because they'll think it's acceptable.  However, if they continue to be rude and mean after you've expressed your feelings, avoid them altogether.  Those who care about you and your feelings will try to work on their behavior.

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5. 80

   Attikosposted 12 years ago

   Depending on how close a relative it is, you can have nothing more to do with him, reduce contact to a manageable level, or learn live with it. Registering objections, and fighting rudeness with rudeness, are methods that give the meanie the attention he's after in the first place and only encourage him to do more of it, so those first three are the only three options you have.
   
   Many problems in life have no good solutions. This is one of them.

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6. 61

   jencooperposted 12 years ago

   This is such a hard situation.  I have something similar going on.  I just posted a question as a matter of fact.  I tried ignoring, then I was blamed for that.  I tried pointing out their behavior, and that turned into them being a victim blaming everyone around them for their behavior.  I am at a loss as to what to do.  I have been avoiding, but again have been accused of being the mean one.  Sometimes you just can't win with people like this.  It is unfortunate when it is family because we know that if someone else was treating us this way we would just cut them out of our lives all together.

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