I love my g.f very much but she is not loving me. what should I do?
You can't "make" someone love you. If your feelings aren't being returned in kind, then it's time to let it go.
First, communicate your feelings openly and honestly to her. Don't beat around the bush about it, tell her EXACTLY how you feel. Some girls have trouble showing affection due to personality or past circumstances, or may not realize they aren't providing enough for you. If you explain your feelings to her, and she truly cares about you, she will take steps to make you stop feeling this way, or at the very least, explain the situation to alleviate your doubts. If you have difficulty expressing your feelings so vulnerably, this may contribute to the issue, and is something personal that you must work on. Be sure to look for what she does more so than what she says. Love is shown via action. Words are weak, and saying I love you doesn't mean nearly as much as doing something that demonstrates it. Perhaps the way she shows that she loves you is subtle and hard to pick up on? If she doesn't seem to care despite knowing how you feel...
Break up with her. It will be very hard, but you sound like a loving person, and you deserve somebody who will love you just as much as you love them. Keeping people like your current girlfriend in your life is toxic. If she doesn't love you now, she never will. She will regret not appreciating you when you're gone, but by then you'll have found someone or something far better than your current relationship ever could have been. Although this may seem heartbreaking to think about, the truth is that you will look back on breaking up with her, and consider it one of the best decisions of your life, especially when you find yourself with someone who truly appreciates you for the wonderful person you are. I've been there, it gets better I promise.
So communicate openly and work things out, or let her go, grieve as long as you need, and go on to live the awesome life you deserve. Look forward to what the future can be, not what the past might have been.
First consider how long you've been in the relationship, what the social norm is in your area for length of time and seriousness it takes to get to a "love" stage (perhaps you're just a bit earlier than her, perhaps she takes a little longer), and the point of time between when you started to love her and when you came to feel this way (that your relationship did not have an equal emotional balance).
We all like to see that moment on TV or dream about it for ourselves where we tell our significant other that we love him or her and then they say it right back and everyone is happy; but of course everyone is individual in reality and may develop feelings at different paces.
Really what it comes down to (for me) without any detail or context is the length of time involved here. If you've fallen hard and fast then that's wonderful for you, but doesn't mean the girl/woman is at the same point - but neither does it mean she'll never get there.
If you've been in this relationship for a while and her feelings seem lukewarm rather than loving, first try an honest talk. Very sensitive, non-accusatory, etc. Trust me, women actually love if a guy is willing to show some vulnerability and talk about where a relationship is going - which is a common conversation to have even when feelings are mutual. Where it can go wrong is if one person becomes whiny or cruel simply because the other doesn't feel the same, or if one person is callous about the emotions of the other.
So 1) consider time as an element, 2) have a talk when a good time arises with no distractions, 3) ultimately a split may occur and the acceptance of this is important to your happiness. A breakup can occur simultaneously with feelings of love still in place. The path you want to follow in life, the dynamic you want in your romantic relationship, and your own mental health are more important than holding on to a relationship that doesn't seem likely to change or move forward.
Good luck and I wish you the best for your future romance.
Love yourself enough to find a new a girlfriend!
"Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."
- Oscar Wilde
If you're not getting what you want in order make you feel loved it means you have chosen the wrong person for yourself.
Each of us chooses our own friends, lovers, and spouse.
Lots of folks will tell you to try communication.
However it's important not to confuse communication with (action).
There are basically two reasons why someone will not give you what you have asked for {after you've expressed it's importance}.
1. They don't have it to give. (In other words it's not who they are.)
2. They don't feel (you) are worth the effort to give it to.
There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them as (is) or move on.
Anyone who is unhappy in a relationship and (chooses) to stay is (choosing) to be unhappy. It's unrealistic to expect someone to "change". Generally speaking people change when (they) are unhappy with the results they are getting out of life.
You're better off seeking someone who (already is) the person you want. Thankfully there are over 7 Billion people on this planet! Everyone of us has options!
Best wishes!
Psychic Frank says, your girlfriend craves physical signs of affection, but also words. Read the "Five Love Languages."
~ Psychic Frank
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