Are shy people weak?

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   Ben716posted 8 years ago

   Are shy people weak?
   
   Do you think shyness is form of weakness, or an advantage part of a person's personality? Should it be discouraged? I am shy person of which many times has helped not falling into doing something weirdly-crazy (evil) of which am thankful. It has helped me to be sober in most situations (especially temptious ones). Can you regard such a person weak who speaking in front of people is a problem, standing in front of girls; a person who keeps brushing a lot tha neccessary - you get the drill. What are your thoughts?

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   LuvConquersAllposted 8 years ago

   I don't see this as a weakness maybe I am a little bios because I consider myself shy in certain situations. Its not weak its just not being in your confort zone. Until you are use to being in certain situations or doing things that others may find enjoyable, takes time and its just something we feel either we like or don't. I enjoy have conversations with others but I seriously hate getting in front of people to talk whether I know them or not. Hope this makes a little sense.

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      Ben716posted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Yah, Angie. Thanks for your answer. It usually takes time for me to gt accustomed to a person. And, as you say at times I don't feel like doing it, example, standing in front of people to give a speech

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      threekeysposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Have you tried sitting down in a smallish group and just chatting with them. That is a form of speech giving.
      I understand your country aims to create entreprenuerial extroverts. China's society desires modest/shy people. Thought of migrating?

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   Kiss andTalesposted 8 years ago

   Very interesting question ! I know shy people , I know people of the opposite even loud and expressive people.
   The shy person I do not consider weak , but more preserved . He has thought out his or her steps before making them .which us not weak at all
   But shows wisdom.
   The shy person may have a problem of applying this too many times when there is no need.
   But some people are attracted to shy people.
   Some times people can work out things they are not happy with in their character Ben.

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      Ben716posted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Kiss and Tales. I have learned shyness is not a weakness though there is always an opportunity for change.

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   threekeysposted 8 years ago

   Shy people are no more weaker or stronger than a extrovert.They just reveal those aspects in a more refined or modest way.
   
   Shy is a cultural word and a word used/applied in a particular period of time.
   To me "Shy" people are more caring sensitive and feeling than someone who needs to overpower or be the ongoing centre of attention.
   Introverts or "shy" people are fantastic in one to one relationships therefore great as a doctor, psychologist, consultant, writer...just to name a few.
   Stand proud!

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      Ben716posted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you Three Keys. Also, I have learnt something I did not know. Introverts are good in jobs that require one to one relationships. Pretty the reason why I am also a writer. Now I know why people approach me with different problems.

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   dashingscorpioposted 8 years ago

   
   
   It's only weak if (you) are unhappy.
   Not everyone is attracted to extroverts.
   You have to decide if you're really a shy person/introvert or if you're self-centered and see yourself as being "above it all" when you're with others. Some people keep to themselves in order to avoid rejection. They want others to approach them/take interest in them.
   The thing you want to avoid is becoming a passenger or spectator in life as oppose to (living) your life.

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      threekeysposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I at the moment can say that to me extroverts just wish "me me me" and are pretty inconsiderate and selfish. Yet I know shy ones are shielded from scrutiny when there is a extrovert in the room. What about being an ambivert?

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I guess it depends on how one defines extraverts. People who confidently introduce themselves in group situations, initiate conversations, and have strong opinions which they share without fear of being disliked are often resented by shy folks.

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      threekeysposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Yes its safer to be less assrrtive with opinions because opinions do chamge when either insight or circumstances change. It serves no one to be so definite/dogmatic unless one says "for only at this point in time". Peace only dashingscorpio.

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   gmwilliamsposted 8 years ago

   
   
   Shyness is a weakness, even an aberration of the personality.  Shyness means that one is uncomfortable in the presence of others.  Shyness furthermore means that one wants to reach out & associate w/others but has an inhibiting factor which prevents them from doing so. 
   
   Many people confuse shyness w/introversion.  There is a MARKED difference between the two.  Introverts are extremely comfortable in their own skin.  They choose to be alone but are capable of associating w/people when they desire to do so.  Unfortunately, our extroverted culture & society equates shyness w/introversion which ISN'T the case at all.  Introverts don't have a hang-up being w/people yet are quite happy being alone while shy people want to be w/people but are fearful of doing so & they also feel inferior because they have poor people skills.  Introverts don't have poor people skills-when they want to be w/people-they CAN but when they want to be alone-they can do this also.  Shyness people are oftentimes forcibly alone-they want to associate but.....CAN'T.

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   SakinaNasir53posted 8 years ago

   Hi Benny! Nice question by the way. ☺
   I am a shy person myself. Being shy is a good thing, shy people are thought to be nice and understanding.
   
   I feel shyness is bad when these things happen:
   
   1. If your shyness gets in the way of your happiness, makes you depressed and it's like you have a lot to say, but you don't want to. It feels like a self inflicted "barrier".
   
   2. It becomes your weakness when it makes you self-criticizing and harsh towards yourself. You feel you are not good enough. I have gone through this, and have thankfully recovered from that stage.
   
   Due to this, I suffered a lot in high school almost 3 years back. After leaving school, I regretted not having fun, staying aloof and not making many friends. It was my shyness that got in the way.
   I decided to get rid of it as I felt I couldn't waste my whole life like that. I am shy even now, but not in a negative way. I can talk to people freely and have many friends now. ☺
   
   Speaking in front of people can be difficult for extroverts too. Try practicing talking in front of a mirror, it will help release anxiety and won't make you nervous, hopefully.
   
   If you feel shy from girls, I can understand that very well. I could talk easily to girls, but not boys. I was too shy and felt I could never talk to one freely. Just try mingling if you can. I know it can be difficult, but trying never fails.
   
   I have even made a hub about shyness, for people like us, for those who are suffering and have no clue about solving it.

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      Ben716posted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for your comment. You have highlighted when shyness turns out to be negative and how to mingle with people. I am usuakly the one approached than being approached. I have never known one moment when I have approached or initiated a conversat

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