Why Aren't More Women the Aggressors in the Dating Game?

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   Kyler J Falkposted 4 years ago

   
   Seeing as I am in an open relationship which allows me to explore my desires, I've come to find an interesting and concerning dynamic I would like to hear the opinion of women on. Men are welcome as well, so long as it is constructive and pertains to the question at hand.
   
   Women just don't seem to want to be the aggressors, though there are the very rare few who are, or they are afraid to be the ones to initiate interaction on a deeper level. I wish it were so simple as me being ugly and off-putting, too, because then I wouldn't be so lost in my thoughts about all the silent beauties in the crowd. From all the data I have available to me, I came to the partial conclusion that the dating game is over 70% men to begin with thus scaring away most females.
   
   So, why aren't you being more aggressive in the dating game, ladies? How do we get you out of your shell?

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      dashingscorpioposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      I suspect there are three reasons why more women aren't agressive
      
      1. Traditions Die Hard
      
      Most popular romance stories involve the (man) pursuing the woman.
      The fairytale ending is having a (man) get on one knee and propose.
      A man is expected to ask for phone numbers, for a dance, or a date.
      It's also considered "romantic" to have men strive to win them over.
      Deep down most women still want the fairytale when it comes to love.
      Women view being in the position to say "yes" or "no" as powerful.
      They don't realize {not having to wait to be asked} is more powerful!
      
      2. Pride and Upholding Double Standards
      
      A lot of women believe girls who pursue men are "desperate" or sluts.
      Some women complain about double standards all the while embracing them at times. Women generally look down on women they consider to be promiscuous/easy. They don't want to befriend them or trust them to be around their men. Where as guys enjoy having "players" as friends.
      They want to "learn their secrets" for getting women to say "yes".
      
      3. Fear of Rejection
      
      For a lot of women the thought of a man rejecting them is soul crushing!
      Men are told dating is a "numbers game" and to take rejection in stride.
      Guys are expected to swallow their pride and ask another girl out.
      
      Women worry about {what men think of them} or might say about them.
      They don't want to risk emasculating a man by coming on too strong.
      Their biggest nightmare is imagining a man laughing with his friends about their efforts to ask him out or failed attempts at seducing him.
      
      Whether one is a man or woman it's important to remember:
      In a world with over 7 Billion people rejection just means: Next!
      
      Never let your fears keep you from finding happiness.
      One man's opinion!
      
      

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   jjackson786posted 4 years ago

   I asked my now-husband out because I really liked him and sensed that he was too shy to make the first move. Glad I did- we've been together for ten years, married for three in September!

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   1. 89

      Kyler J Falkposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      An early congratulations on three years!
      
      My girlfriend approached me by saying "You're hot!" and I took it from there, we'll have been together for eight in July!

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   jjackson786posted 4 years ago

   My pickup line was, "Do you like to drink?" Happy eight years!

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