So, you or your boyfriend is relocating to another city for school or a new job, and you two are debating about whether you should break up, or try having a long distance relationship.
Forgive my bluntness, but don't even think about going through with a long-distance relationship unless you are both extremely devoted to one another, and willing to make sacrifices for the relationship. If this doesn't sound like you, then you should cut your losses now, and avoid a potentially heart-wrenching situation in the future.
If, on the other hand, you are both ready and willing to handle a relationship from afar, then be sure to read on for some indispensable tips -- if I do say so myself -- on how to make it work.
Of course, relocating to a new city will involve meeting new people and doing new things, but that doesn't mean that your significant other should fall to the bottom of your list of priorities.
It is important to set aside time every day to phone or e-mail each other, without any distractions. Tell each other details about your day, your friends, co-workers, etc., so that you both feel a part of the other person's life; this seemingly small step will go a long way in reducing the distance between the two of you.
Make an effort to visit one another as often as possible, not only when it is expected, such as for holidays. Make sure that it isn't always the same person who is going out of their way for the other, because this will inevitably lead to some serious resentment.
If you don't put in the time and effort to see one another, then you will eventually drift apart, no matter how strong your love is. After all, you need some physical contact to keep a relationship going.
Be sure to organize your schedule so that when he does come to visit, you have nothing to do but spend quality time with him. Tell your friends and family that you are officially unavailable during the time that you and your sweetie plan on being together.
This will not only be enjoyable in itself, but it will also make him feel like her efforts were appreciated, and that he is truly loved.
Do sweet, spontaneous things to show him how much you miss him. If he's the one who left town, then send him something that he misses from back home, like his favorite snack from the local bakery, or a local newspaper. If he's feeling homesick, send him a photograph of the two of you, or burn her a CD of her favorite songs or songs that makes you think of him.
Even if this sounds a bit sappy, a long-distance relationship is no time to be a challenge; it's a time to keep your man loving and missing you, and looking forward to seeing you again.
As hard as this may initially seem, it is imperative for you to relax and trust one another. In other words, don't start assuming the worst just because your boyfriend is making new friends, or going out more with his friends back home.
If you call and he isn't there, don't automatically think that it's because some girl has come in and taken your place. If you don't trust him enough to let him live his life without you by his side at every moment, then perhaps you should reread my introduction, and admit that you aren't prepared to handle a long-distance relationship after all.
roll with the punches
If one of you only moved temporarily and plans on moving back home, then you will both just have to be patient until that time comes. If, on the other hand, the move seems to be more permanent in nature, you have to decide how long you are willing to drag the long distance thing out for.
Will the person in the other city look for a suitable place for the two of you to live and start hunting out some job leads for the other? Or will you eventually go your separate ways? These are things that you will have to consider at one time or another; and there's no time like the present, as they say.
love him madly
If you decide that you can cope with a long-distance relationship, there are a few key qualities you both must possess for it to really work, namely, loyalty, trust, respect, and love for one another. And I'm not talking about really liking the other person; I'm talking about the uncontrollable, inexplicable, blinding kind of love, which you will do almost anything to hold on to. If you've got that, but can also respect each other as individuals, then you can make it work.
Hm. I've still got a crush on a girl I haven't seen for 49 years, but I'm pretty sure that doesn't count as a long distance relationship. Unless the distance refers to the space between my ears or the mileage between a half-century crush and sanity or something...
by Jemuel 5 years ago
Have you experienced a long distance relationship? What did you do to make it last?
by RangerTexas 7 years ago
Im currently in a 2 year LDR, which we met through online, we started just messaging and chatting every night.We started to feel feelings for each other, so we talk sometimes during the day and night. She occasionally call or text me love notes( which i miss alot).She lives in another country and I...
by catchpennyfashion 6 years ago
What would you do in a long distance relationship when the stakes change?Say you were supposed to be apart for only a year but your significant other got offered a great opportunity and has to stay for three years instead of one. You live in different countries so traveling often to see each other...
by Naeh816 3 years ago
Time apart does not bring you closer together; despite what fairytales, movies and books tell you but being clingy doesn't help either. Distance cannot fill the void of actually having that person there with you but it can make the heart grow fonder. There's an upside and downside to long distance...
by Brandon Mallo 18 months ago
For them? Against them? What's your opinion on a long distance love?
by agoins 3 years ago
How long does a long distance relationship last before you say enough is enough
Copyright © 2018 HubPages Inc. and respective owners. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. HubPages® is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc. HubPages and Hubbers (authors) may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, Google, and others.
|HubPages Device ID||This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.|
|Login||This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.|
|HubPages Traffic Pixel||This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.|
|Remarketing Pixels||We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.|
|Conversion Tracking Pixels||We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.|