Dear Lovie

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   Dear Lovieposted 13 years ago

   hi, my name is Lovie.
   I wanted to start this forum, because I want to start my own advice column.
   I figured there are so many other teenage girls and women that go to there friends for advice and what there friends tell them does not seem to really cut it.
   For years I have cried to my friends over guys and went to them for the answers, but they all told me what I wanted to hear not what I needed to hear.
   I wanted to make an advice column that can reach out to teenage girls or women like myself.
   I figured Why not take advice from someone that can relate?
   I may not be older, but I know what it feels like to want to get the truth and not being able to hear it. 
   Iv'e always been the friend to call when it came to my friends problems and now id like to share my advice with other people.
   I just want to be able to give people the words they need to hear.
   So if you tell me your problem, I'll give you my honest opinion.

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      hopelesssromaticposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Dear Lovie, Me and boyfriend just broke up. We have been together for 3 years. I don't know how to move on without him. What should I do?

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         Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Dear Hopeless, I'm sorry about your boyfriend. Moving on can be one of the hardest things to do in life. Being in a long term relationship takes allot of commitment and if you end one it can  take a long time to heal. I understand your probably in a pretty emotional state right, but don't worry with time comes acceptance. As for what you should do. Get out more, become a social butterfly. The best thing to do right now is to keep your occupied and keep yourself away from thoughts of your past.

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   WryLiltposted 13 years ago

   Hi Lovie,
   
   Sounds like a great idea, however you're not likely to get many teens asking for advice after seeing this post. The Hubpages ToS requires users to be 18 or over to join the site.
   
   However you should definitely do some hubs on this - you'll get a lot more views meaning you'll help a lot more people than handing out advice to one person at a time.

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      Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you. Your advice was really helpful.

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         WryLiltposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Lovie, I didn't mean tell the internet at large to come and ask you for advice - search engines won't just 'send' you visitors because you said you can help.
         
         I mean you can probably write hubs on topics like 'What to do when your boyfriend dumps you' or 'How to deal with friendship breakups.'

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            Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            That is true. I'll keep that in mind next time I start a hub. Thanks for your help.

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   blondepoetposted 13 years ago

   Dear Lovie how do I get to tell my friend Cal that his relationship with his blow up doll Norma Jean is not healthy. He thinks she is real and hides her under my bed when his father returns from the army. I stood on her with my high heel once, never saw her there, she deflated like a prune, it caused a huge arguement between Cal and I.

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      Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Dear Blonde poet, your friend is what they call a objectum sexual( a person who is love with inanimate objects). The best  thing you can do is sit down and have a talk with him and tell him how you feel about this. This might be an awkward conversation, but he really shouldn't be talking to objects that cannot talk back. There could be some serious intimacy issues hes experienced in the past that have cause him to act like this. I would question him if hes had any bad relationships in the past. If talking to him doesn't work I would really suggest some sort of counseling.

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         blondepoetposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Wow Lovie I am an instant fan. You rock!!!

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            Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            Thank you so much!

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      camloposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Is Cal still angry with you? I remember the incident well; you even offered him your puncture kit and bicycle pump.

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         blondepoetposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         ROFL he sure is Cam. I did indeed offer him the pump which he did indeed use. He reckons her facial features have never been the same since and that I stood on her on purpose because I was jealous.
         Jealous of Norma mmmmmm,lololol.

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   Lifeallstar1posted 13 years ago

   Dear Lovie, Welcome to Hubpages, BTW! I'm a college student and live on campus. A few guys here keep asking me out and I'm just not interested in them that way. I have told them in the nicest way possible that I do not think of them that way but they don't seem to care lol. I think they think I will change my mind. What is the best way to handle this? If they were jerks it would be easier but they are really nice. It has become very awkward for me, though.

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      Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Dear Lifeallstar1, Iv'e been through this many of times actually. The best thing to do is ignore them. If you ignore the fact that they keep asking you they will eventually go away. Just explain to them that you don't want them in that way and that it will never happen. Eventually they will take the hint. I'm not saying be mean to them but if you show your uninterested they will move on. Trust me its college, they will realize there are many other girls out there.

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   donotfearposted 13 years ago

   Dear Lovie,
   How about this one:   Cindy developed a relationship with Fred online, which proceeded into telephone, texting, & chatting; then cyber sex & phone sex.  Cindy found out Fred was staying at another woman's home during all this time but he stated they were just "friends". He evidently was using her for a meal ticket while he played with Cindy on the side.
   
   So Cindy got wise and came to her senses, but Fred blew her off before she could tell him to go rot, cause Cindy named his game & he turned out to be a chicken *hit. Fred has since left the other woman's home & moved on. Here's the stickler: Should Cindy rat the guy out to the other woman he was using for a meal ticket?
   
   (I know how I'd answer this, but thought I'd give it a spin for you).

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      Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Dear donotfear, Even though it seems Cindy is still mad at her ex and didn't get to end there relationship in the end, I don't think getting back at her ex will really do much since he's not even even with the other women anymore. My mother used to tell me "what goes around comes around". I am a total believer of karma, Fred will eventually get all the wrongs he did to women and then some.

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   hiddensmilesposted 13 years ago

   Dear Lovie,  I'm really confused right now. Some days my friends will act like I'm invisible. It gets me upset because I feel like they're embarrassed to be seen with me, but sometimes they will act like they're my best friends. I don't know how to explain this but I'm trying my best. One day I will walk with my friend to class and the next minute she leaves me to walk with other people or should I say "better" people. I don't know why she would just leave me walking all alone. At lunch I will start talking and everyone ignores me. Maybe they just didn't hear me? I'm really nice and I feel like I'm a push over. If they ask me to do something for them, then I do it. I only do it because I want to become closer with my friends. The sad part is they don't even thank me. I know it's not a big deal, but I'm just getting sick of this. Are they my true friends? Also can you please give me some advice on socializing?

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      Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Dear Hidden smiles, It sounds to me like your friends aren't really much of friends. The first thing I would do is talk with them and let them know how you really feel. Also doing things for your friends doesn't gain you friends. Your friends should be friends with you because they enjoy your friendship not because of the nice things you do for them. If they continue to act this way the best thing you can do is to go on with life and make real loyal friends. As for advice on socializing, do not change the type of person you are to fit the needs of other people. There are people out there that will accept you for the way you are and that hiddensmiles  will be your "true friends"  “A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.”.

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         hiddensmilesposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Thank you so much for your advice. I'm going to try talking to them and see how things go.

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            Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            Anytime, let me know how things work out. Good luck!

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   seanorjohnposted 13 years ago

   My best friend, Suzie talks about me behind my back , personal insults etc. And the thing is she's a spotty, devious cow.Do you think I was wrong to make a facebook account in her name listing her as  an escort?
   Also her brother was rude to me so I planted some drugs in his room and called the cops. He's in prison now so I guess that's not a problem.I only burnt their house down so we could live closer to each other. The homeless shelter is not as bad as she makes out and it is real close.
   My question is: "Can we ever be best friends again"?

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      Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Dear seanorjohn, seeking vengeance should never be an answer to your problems. Even though you were mad about the way Suzie and her brother treated you. Getting back at them was never the right answer. If you do horrible things to people those horrible things will happen to you. Except even worse. Treat others the way you like to be treated. Do not lower your self down to others because you feel hurt, it just makes you just as bad as them. To the question if you can be friends again. Only, you can answer this question. All relationships are based off of truth without it you will never have one.

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      donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      
      I love this!
      

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   donotfearposted 13 years ago

   Dear Lovie:
   My daughter continually finds herself in relationships where the guy usually blows her off after about 2 weeks. Any suggestions?
   D

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      Dear Lovieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Dear donofear, The best advice I can give to you is to ask your daughter what qualities she finds attractive in a man and what she thinks she doing wrong. Maybe the men shes surrounding her self with don't have the same ideals as her. Coming from recent experience, the best thing you can do is to ignore them. Men like a chase not be chased. Tell your daughter to date around. That way she can let them know she doesn't wait around and it gives her a chance to keep her options open. Don't wait by the phone for the phone call. There is much more to life then guys,trust me. Let them come to you. I am positive there is going to be that one guy who stays around for much more then 2 weeks. Give it time.

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