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If your pet could talk...

  1. Mamelody profile image60
    Mamelodyposted 7 years ago

    what d'ya think will be the first thing it will say to you?

    My dog would most likely say "can't I sleep on the fcuking couch for once?!"

    My cat would say "stop tickling my tummy, am not a doll!"

    My chickens would say "could we have some bacon please?" lol

    1. quicksand profile image84
      quicksandposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Er ... looks like you spelt something wrong! lol

      1. Mamelody profile image60
        Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I always sucked at spelling lol

  2. blondepoet profile image79
    blondepoetposted 7 years ago

    My pet fish would say "Hey you...yea Blondie I'm talking to you...how bout a pair of goggles for a change...."

    1. Mamelody profile image60
      Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      lol lol thats a good one tongue

  3. livewithrichard profile image85
    livewithrichardposted 7 years ago

    My dog would say, "LOOK DAMMIT, that F-ing squirrel is F-ing with me again. Just let me out front for one minute and I'll teach him a thing or two about trespassing."


    LOL or usually when I get home and walk through the door, even if it was just to go check the mail, he would say, "Thank God you're home, I didn't think you would ever come back, I missed you so much, now get me some damn food before you look in the bedroom."

    1. Mamelody profile image60
      Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      That's probably the second thing my dog would say big_smile

      1. tobey100 profile image61
        tobey100posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        If either of my dogs could talk I'd have to kill 'em.  They know too much!

  4. profile image0
    Justine76posted 7 years ago

    My dogs would say..."leave me alone. I like the way it tastes!!"
    Cat...."Your welcome". in a smug voucie

  5. Stevennix2001 profile image83
    Stevennix2001posted 7 years ago

    mine would just whine and curse me out every time i was eating, and he'd be begging for table scraps.  even though he's always well fed and gets a snack just for going to the bathroom outside. however, he'll still curse me out for my food when i eat.  lol.

  6. waynet profile image50
    waynetposted 7 years ago

    My dog would say everyone move the f**k away from the fire that hot smoky bitch is my warm place, everyone back the f*ck off!!!

    Now I'm laying here make us a cup of tea and while you're at it lick my arse cos I hate doing it myself!!

    1. Isabelle22 profile image61
      Isabelle22posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Now I know why I only have half a dog lol.

  7. profile image0
    TattoGuyposted 7 years ago

    My tropical fish wud say " jeeez Art, fish food only costs a dollar, feed us ya tight git "

    1. Isabelle22 profile image61
      Isabelle22posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Haha

      1. profile image0
        TattoGuyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Wud rather have you in my fish tank, you wud get steak lol smile

    2. Mamelody profile image60
      Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      lol lol

      1. profile image0
        TattoGuyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        One is floating at the top, is that a bad sign ?

        1. Ivorwen profile image83
          Ivorwenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Nope.  Just trying to get a tan.  smile

        2. waynet profile image50
          waynetposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Yep, call the fish doctor!!

  8. Ivorwen profile image83
    Ivorwenposted 7 years ago

    My new dog would say, "Let me in!  I don't like it out here when you are all inside.  Oh, and do you have any food?  I'm hungry again."

    My old dog would say, "Please let me out of the yard!  I'll only eat a couple of snow mobilers!  Just enough to teach them not to speed past here.  Promise.  Then I'll come back."

  9. dogluver1 profile image59
    dogluver1posted 7 years ago

    My dogs would say "Hey just because its 20 degrees out I wanna go for a walk!"

    My cats would say "Stop pushing me off the bed at night, cant I sleep there freaking once?"

               ~dogluver1

    1. Mamelody profile image60
      Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      sound like we both have metal pets.. glad they can't talk :lol

  10. profile image0
    Pani Midnyte Odinposted 7 years ago

    My oldest cat would probably say, "Can we get rid of that stupid little nut bag you brought home a few months ago? She keeps eating my food!"

    My youngest cat would probably say, "Give me more food please, I spilled mine."

  11. profile image0
    TattoGuyposted 7 years ago

    Anyone wanna buy a secondhand fish tank ?

    1. Mamelody profile image60
      Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      as long as it doesn't talk!! lol

      1. profile image0
        TattoGuyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Sold to that hot lookin chick smile

        1. Mamelody profile image60
          Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          wohoo! being a hot chick pays off.. for once no boobies involved lol lol

    2. profile image0
      lyricsingrayposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      lol lol lol

  12. Arthur Fontes profile image89
    Arthur Fontesposted 7 years ago

    My GSD would probably give me instructions if he could talk.


    My Chihuahua would just say "play with me Play with me"

  13. Andrea Hanly profile image62
    Andrea Hanlyposted 7 years ago

    Pretty sure my dog would ask why I had his balls cut off......

    1. figment profile image74
      figmentposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      LMAO

    2. Mamelody profile image60
      Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I would ask too if my balls were missing sad

  14. earnestshub profile image87
    earnestshubposted 7 years ago

    One of our pets does talk!
    I ain't repeatin what Eric the parrot says here though, don't wanna get banned!

    1. Green Lotus profile image60
      Green Lotusposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      LOL! I had a parrot for 19 years. He could sing "it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood" from Mr. Roger's neighborhood.

    2. quicksand profile image84
      quicksandposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I actually knew someone who had taught his parrot to say "FcCough!" The bird used to greet all visitors! lol lol lol

      1. earnestshub profile image87
        earnestshubposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Nice! lol Eric is only 9 years old, he is an Eclectus, and is the worst bird in Australia, and that may be official!

        He waits until your ear is right next to his cage as you pass by, then screams at such a volume it will lift people out of their shoes. It sounds like a smoke detector with the volume up about 200%.
        When he does, I offer to turn him into "Eric soup"
        He walks across the floor to bash the cats and dogs as well!

        1. quicksand profile image84
          quicksandposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Export him! lol

    3. Mamelody profile image60
      Mamelodyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I had a parrot that always said "fook me, fook me pweease!" I had to give it away because it upset the neighbors.. tongue

  15. Beth100 profile image83
    Beth100posted 7 years ago

    Ha ha Earnest!  I have had 3 parrots in the past, and I can't repeat what they said either!  lol

    My dog would say: "Pleeze, let me out...I just want a tasty morsel!  That little dog next door would do just fine!  Pleeeeeze???"

    My fish would say:  "How's the air out there??"

  16. Faybe Bay profile image83
    Faybe Bayposted 7 years ago

    My son and I have decided what our cats would say if they could talk.
    Binx(the oldest)Come on, it's time for bed. Isn't it time for bed? do you ever sleep?
    Spaztastic (The youngest) Who wants to play I want to play lets have a race can I ea.....um play with the snake?
    And Roxy (the female) Meow.

  17. pooja0908 profile image62
    pooja0908posted 7 years ago

    I don’t have pets coz I am not that much good in look after them but if I had they would say Let me go. smile

    1. Faybe Bay profile image83
      Faybe Bayposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      big_smile big_smilebig_smile

  18. Ms Chievous profile image81
    Ms Chievousposted 7 years ago

    My dog would say would you just stay home already!  And she would also say " what??  I don't know how that dog bone got in the couch I am not supposed to sit on!!"

    My cat would say " why the hell did you get this dog? Things were fine when it was just us!"

  19. kirstenblog profile image76
    kirstenblogposted 7 years ago

    "whats up with this dry food? I got standards ya know! Get out the good stuff or I will get someone else to feed me!"

  20. samboiam profile image59
    samboiamposted 7 years ago

    My little puppy princess would say, "Aren't you glad I let you all live in my house?"

  21. st0rm3 profile image60
    st0rm3posted 7 years ago

    my rats: 'We didn't mean to chew right through that, it just looked tasty'

  22. profile image0
    lyricsingrayposted 7 years ago

    my cute little white female maltese would say

    "Is it too much to ask for you to invite a male dog over for a bloomin hour geez already."

  23. profile image0
    StormRyderposted 7 years ago

    Raven, my Alaskan Malmute..She would say "Don't call me a bitch....Bitch!!"

    Sorry for the language. tongue
    Why do they call female dogs bitches anyway??

  24. EmpressFelicity profile image84
    EmpressFelicityposted 7 years ago

    From any of our three cats (particularly the one who's my avatar): "No, of course you don't have to feed me now.  Just any time within the next 30 seconds will do fine."

  25. Kimmie10 profile image78
    Kimmie10posted 7 years ago

    Hamster #1:  I'm feeling old.

    Hamster #2:  Why are you keeping on a diet?

    Hamster #3:  Stop watching me play in my wheel.

    Hamster #4:  When is company coming over?

 
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