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How Many People Do Not Have Kids

  1. SweetiePie profile image82
    SweetiePieposted 7 years ago

    How many people truly believe life can be 100% fulfilling for those that may never have children?  How many people are childfree and loving it?  I think kids are great, I just do not want any of my own.

    1. fierycj profile image86
      fierycjposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I think its a matter of the mind. Oprah appears to be fulfilled, and she's the richest woman in Entertainment.

      1. SweetiePie profile image82
        SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I respect Oprah completely, and she does seem to enjoy her success.

    2. 0
      dennisemattposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      well, i never wanted kids. i was terrified of hte responabillity. it happend naywya, and I swear, I can timagine my life wihtout them. If I had never had any, I would have missed out on more then I can explain. BUT.....you cant miss what you never had. If you really dont want kids, if your having fun as is, dont go having any on purpose. Its your call, and no kid wants to grow up knowing how they messed up mom's life.

    3. Rob Dee profile image60
      Rob Deeposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      i'm child free and i absolutely love it. My ex had a 12 year old and that's a BIG reason why she's my ex now. It can extremely tough to be in a relationship with other peoples kids. On the plus side though, now there is a lot more freedom.

    4. Davinagirl3 profile image59
      Davinagirl3posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I always said that having children is the worst thing a person could do to the enviornment, since the population is growing incrementally.  I think that having children is a, somewhat, selfish endevour.  If having children is not right for you, I think it is your right to choose not to have any.  Children are a huge responsibility, not everyone would want to take on such a responsibility.  I hate to think that some women feel pressured into having babies.

      1. candice5 profile image60
        candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        You have hit the nail on the head

    5. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Same, but i don't necessarily think that they are that wonderful.
      Most of my friends regret ever having any.

    6. kmackey32 profile image82
      kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      My children are my life and I don't think I would be here without them in it.. Maybe I would feel different if I didn't have them but I cant think of my life without them.... I think some people just feel the need to be a caretaker as I am also a CNA..I feel the greatest when I am helping someone or taking care of them..

      1. Ambition profile image76
        Ambitionposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        you are lucky that you are a mother and you can feel the real spiritual love between you and your kids.

        1. candice5 profile image60
          candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          She is happy to be in that role So good for her.

        2. kmackey32 profile image82
          kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Thank you ambition

    7. Mobile Phones profile image60
      Mobile Phonesposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I can assure you, one day you will say " I want my Own Kids".

      Source: Personal Experience.

      http://hubpages.com/x/hub_32.gifcool  http://hubpages.com/x/hub_32.gif

      1. Uninvited Writer profile image83
        Uninvited Writerposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Not necessarily. I never wanted kids of my own, and my opinion never changed.

    8. 60
      shakil2009posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      i think children are necessry elemnet in our life. youth and middlaged passed and then we need anyone who care ourselves and i think whiout childen is not possible . i know in western counrties have lot of old houses but we also know what is the problem there. old man get meal and treatment but not get truly love. that was only possible with children.
      i not ignore those kind of persons also who do no want children but time and time they changed

  2. Misha profile image76
    Mishaposted 7 years ago

    So, you are voluntarily withdrawing your genes from the humanity gene pool... Does not know you enough to really tell is it beneficial to the humanity or not, I guess you should know better wink

    1. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Nasty

      1. Misha profile image76
        Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        But true. You'll get used to it, providing you stay here any longer. smile

        1. candice5 profile image60
          candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          I don't know if I feel good about that, the lady that started this seems really nice, and genuine, I think that that was immensely horrid to say that to her.

          1. Misha profile image76
            Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            Yes and no. We have a long history of relationships with SweetiePie here, that has both bright and dark sides. It's all in the context. smile

            1. candice5 profile image60
              candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

              Thank goodness I came off one Forum ages ago, abit like this and was called a Pommie Bitch. Wasn't impressed so thought Wow another Site like that one.

              1. Misha profile image76
                Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                No, it's not always like that. In fact it most of the time not like that, except for religion and politics. smile

                1. candice5 profile image60
                  candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

                  After I made that post of mine (first ever) I looked in Politics, and even that felt unfriendly so yes I left hurriedly Don't know that much about all the Religions, so didn't go there they are always contentious.

            2. SweetiePie profile image82
              SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

              I have no dark side to my personality and I am 100% a genuine person.  Your comment was rude and I tried to ignore it yesterday, but your implying I am not a nice person will not change the fact that I absolutely am.  Also, if I wanted to have kids I would be a good mother, and there is nothing wrong with my genetics.  Your comment was rude and trying to justify it was petty.

              1. tksensei profile image61
                tksenseiposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                And humble. Don't forget humble.


                smile

                1. SweetiePie profile image82
                  SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                  I do not claim to be humble, but joking about anyone's genetics is never justified, and then going on to justify it is too much.  I was hanging out on the forum to stay away from the politics.

              2. Misha profile image76
                Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                Yeah, sure Sweetie, you are 100% love and light, and I am 100% hate and darkness. smile

                I was not actually talking about your personality here, I was talking about our relationship that has bright and dark sides, sorry if I worded this erroneously. smile

                1. SweetiePie profile image82
                  SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                  I never said you are 100% hate, but really that comment was a bit much.  Oh well, wish that person had never brought it up to be honest with you.

                  1. Misha profile image76
                    Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                    You implied it Sweetie. Pretty much like I implied problems with your genes (which I don't believe  you have ). I just did it consciously to tease you, and you just did not watch your words. smile

                    Talking about watching your words, who is this person that better never brought me up? My mother? yikes How dare you! wink

  3. SweetiePie profile image82
    SweetiePieposted 7 years ago

    I really just wanted to start my own thread where single people without kids could talk about how not having kids can be just as fulfilling as having them.  I feel no need to procreate, and I really think it has nothing to do with my genes being in the pool of humanity.  I think it is slightly provocative to imply someone's genes are not as good as others, why go there? I do not even think about it that way.  This is just a fun thread where single and child free people can share that they feel good too, even if they never have children.

    1. 0
      dennisemattposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      oops. I missed that one. sorry...not the place for me...I really meant that if you dont want a kid, its no crime...catch ya later sweetie pie. Have lots of fun and dont be hard on yourself.  smile

      1. SweetiePie profile image82
        SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I really enjoyed reading what you had to say though denisematt:).

        Very good points emievil:).

    2. 0
      Leta Sposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I've broken my promise of ever coming to the forums again to respond to your post, Sweetiepie.  smile

      Yes, I agree.  This is rather provocative for anyone to assume.  There are all kinds of reasons people decide not to have children/or do not have them.  And maybe it just could be that some people's genes could actually be BETTER than others...that they see the world may be populated enough, or that in their situation, having a child would not be a good idea as they could not give he/she what all is needed (true unselfishness), or that they are better off serving (sometimes in child related professions) or using their talents in the world in another way.  And those reasons are just for starters.

      And like it or not, women still have a harder time maintaining freedom having children.  Just a fact. 

      Anyway.  It is a choice.  Absolutely.  And I don't understand disparaging other people's choices.  Unless, lol, you are somebody like Octomom or something.  Now that's a reason perhaps, to disparage a choice(s). !

      Thanks, Sweetie, for posting this.

    3. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      That was a totally stupid remark disregard it the Guy probably has kids, Just like my friends. Had a phone call today. Theres a big expo of Craft on and she wants to go, and none of us want to look after her human gene pool, because we too want to go, and we didn't have them.
      They only die like everything else, I think it is selfish having kids. (Good excuse eh)

    4. gmwilliams profile image84
      gmwilliamsposted 3 years ago in reply to this

      See nothing wrong with being childfree. I have hobbies and activities to keep me occupied.  One does not need children in order to be fulfilled.  Such an idea of totally atavistic to say the least.  There are people who have children who in hindsight wish THEY HADN'T.

  4. Misha profile image76
    Mishaposted 7 years ago

    Sure ma'am, sorry ma'am

    *grabs his hat and silently leaves*

    smile

    1. 0
      dennisemattposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      but, you siad it...so it wasnt silent...

  5. emievil profile image84
    emievilposted 7 years ago

    My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years now and we don't have a child. I can't say I'm pressured to have one (although in our culture, not having one will make you the topic in any gathering)and we don't pressure each other as well smile. I think we'll have one when we're good and ready, not because some people think we should have one. Right now, we're just enjoying each other's company and building up our assets (or riches smile). My husband and I also talked about it and we think that if we'll have one or two, that's good. If we don't, then we're not meant to have one.

  6. SweetiePie profile image82
    SweetiePieposted 7 years ago

    It sounds like you and your husband are just taking time to get to know each other.  Nothing wrong with that smile.  I not even saying I will 100% never going to have kids, but I am not going to feel my life was any less rewarding even if I do not.

    1. emievil profile image84
      emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Hear, hear! And don't let people tell you otherwise smile. Believe me, there are a lot of folks here who think that a woman's greatest mission in life is to have kids (plural, not singular). I just don't listen to them, that's all smile. I see no point in pressuring myself (and my hubby) to have one. I've also seen women here who are rich and fulfilled even if they don't have children, and women who are harassed and can't take care of their children. Believe me, I'm not ready to be in these harassed women's shoes.

  7. SweetiePie profile image82
    SweetiePieposted 7 years ago

    Sorry if my thread sounded so serious smile.  I really do not even know how to start a fun thread.  I have a feeling this is not a very popular topic anyway.

    1. 0
      dennisemattposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Ok. sorry Im still here..its interesting to me...
      first off, you should know by know threads just EVOLVE....no matter how you start it. and it is a very popular topic. Thats what makes people so ........argumentative?
      what I was trying to say is...having kids is a personal choice, I personally love mine, but in no way should you be made to feel bad becasue you responsabilly decide your not ready.

  8. getpaidtopost profile image60
    getpaidtopostposted 7 years ago

    My daughter and my wife are the only reasons i continue to live. I think without them I would have topped myself long time ago.

    The best thing i ever done was to settle down and have a child.

    Money can also make people feel fulfilled however that's just a feeling, god forbid that money never runs out.

    people who just have money have great security, however Love is the real fulfillment of life.

    1. emievil profile image84
      emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I love guys who are good family men. smile what you said is true but children are the parents' responsibilities also. I've seen so many irresponsible parents and children not very well treated because their parents weren't prepared. I don't want to become like these parents. If I think I'm not prepared, I would rather have no child at all.

      1. getpaidtopost profile image60
        getpaidtopostposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Good point, I made a crazy post years ago which received lots of attention. please don't be offended. It was my thought that all should be sterilized at child baring stage of life. As this op is now reversible. People wishing to start a family should be required to meet a few requirements before the reversal op. These reqirements should be IQ , mental stability test, and support in terms of Money.

        Where i live I know of people who just have kids to get money of the govenment people have upto 11 kids of who i know and they get nearly £4000 a month from government.

        These people are not responsible, hell most of them just let the kids roam the streets whilst they drink all day.

        I think my requirements would stop the above and much of the anti social behavior from kids. IMO smile

    2. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I have never understood why people need kids, isn't it just an animal instinct?

  9. SweetiePie profile image82
    SweetiePieposted 7 years ago

    I get what you are saying dennisematt.  From experience I rarely start threads though because these never seem to go very far.  It was just an obervation I have noticed smile.

    1. 0
      dennisemattposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I know. You can start a thread about lunch, and it lasts a day. You can start a thread about morals or religion or politcs, it will go on and on and on....but YOU and your original question will be long forgotten. I gave up in starting threads too.  smile I do think you are really a sweet girl.

  10. emievil profile image84
    emievilposted 7 years ago

    Sorry SweetiePie, I think I'm hogging your post. You just posted a topic that is really interesting for me smile.

    1. SweetiePie profile image82
      SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I am enjoying what you have to say smile.

  11. SweetiePie profile image82
    SweetiePieposted 7 years ago

    Thanks Dennise!  I am tired of those political threads, I have tried to stay away.  Funny how the smallest things said over there can still be quoted hours later lol.

  12. James S. Thornton profile image61
    James S. Thorntonposted 7 years ago

    I don't have any children right now.

    Maybe I'll have them later on, when I got more money and this blasted recession is over.

    With enough money, you can hang on to a large part of your freedom despite having children.

    That's how I look at it.

    I'm 31 right now and I don't really want kids until I'm 40 or something.

    1. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I have a friend that is just on 40 and she said all the time what you did when I m 30 when I m forty and shes 40 now and its Oh well I m over it. Too old to bother.

  13. 0
    dennisemattposted 7 years ago

    @ get paid to post, I sorry didn't know how to qoute wihtout it being all long...
    thats an interesting idea. Right now you have to get councilling to even have the operation. like..do you know its not reversable? do you know youll NEVER have kids? I really dont think there is anything wrong in waiting till your ready. If you wiat till its PERFECT...you wont have kids ever. and I happen to know, youd miss out on alot.

    1. getpaidtopost profile image60
      getpaidtopostposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Yes I know there is a few creases, and its a totally crazy idea. just a thought to stop all these producers of wasters. Wish it was that easy. smile

      1. 0
        dennisemattposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I know. On my local news, they do this thing.Thursday's Child. Every week on Thursady, they feature a kid that is a ward of the state, for whatever reason. The kids needs to be adopted. It toatlly breaks my heart every single time. I mean, these kids didnt ask to exist, they alwasy say.."I dont care where I live, I just want to belong, to have a familly, to beloved."  I know too well how it feels to be an unwanted child, and I thank God every day my kids are mine, and they are wanted, and they know it. It kills me....

        1. getpaidtopost profile image60
          getpaidtopostposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Well said, Dennise, Kids should be wanted from the heart, and I feel this in your words. smile

  14. Colebabie profile image59
    Colebabieposted 7 years ago

    I don't have any children yet. I am 22 and I still have 3 years left of school. My parents had me when they were 24. When I was younger I thought that was a nice age to begin a family. But that isn't going to be the case for me. While my boyfriend and I have been together for four years and have great experience with children, its still not the time. I also have a condition where it might be difficult to get pregnant (same as Kate from Jon & Kate plus 8). So in my case it may not be wise to wait too long, but ya never know smile I know ya'll think I'm crazy young to even think about kids. But I'm really not. I'm actually one of two out of 5 girls that have known each other since we were born that does not have children. The other girl just got back from her second tour in Iraq. But it will happen when it happens. But yes, I want children. However, some people can live extremely happy fulfilling lives not having had children. I don't think that having kids "is the point of life".

  15. SweetiePie profile image82
    SweetiePieposted 7 years ago

    Very good points Lita, and might I add I am glad to see you did come back, if only for a short visit smile.

  16. Mac Mission profile image61
    Mac Missionposted 7 years ago

    I have 1 sweet daughter of 1year old ...... !!! she loves me lot and I love her too much. We have different stages to enjoy life. I passed school days with friends , college days with friends and studies, marriage with wife, now daughter ...... I just enjoying this ...

  17. Ron Montgomery profile image61
    Ron Montgomeryposted 7 years ago

    Kids - 0
    dogs - 2

    cats - 4

    Dogs and cats can be challenging to raise just like children.

    If there was a kid pound to take the more difficult ones to, I might consider adopting some.

    1. Raven King profile image61
      Raven Kingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      LOL

      kids 0

      wild animals: songbirds, falcons, chipmunks and they are free! No poop patrol! yeah!

      hobbies: too many, knitting, writing, painting, pretending to play the accordion, learning new languages, playing video games, dreaming about KORG ( synthesizer), etc.

      You are young so you might change your mind.

  18. Lady_E profile image82
    Lady_Eposted 7 years ago

    You seem very young (your pic). I'm guessing you might change your mind maybe in 5 years time... but there is nothing wrong in not wanting any.

  19. dohn121 profile image87
    dohn121posted 7 years ago

    I don't have any children (that I'm aware of), but I would like to someday.  I'm seeing someone right now and she does not want kids.  It's a little frustrating.

  20. simplyjo profile image60
    simplyjoposted 7 years ago

    Well I ain't married but I'd have kids if my hubby wants em..

  21. janni321 profile image61
    janni321posted 7 years ago

    I am 25 and don't have any kids and don't want any in near future, its sure. But may be sometime in my life I need kids

  22. Colebabie profile image59
    Colebabieposted 7 years ago

    Well good luck with that one Candice. If you use the excuse "they only die like everything else" you aren't living.

    1. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Actually my nightlife alone, would mean I could be bothered trying to cope with a Kid. I am a Party animal, and intend staying that way.
      Fun is what I enjoy and living is only fun for me without a Kid.

      1. Colebabie profile image59
        Colebabieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        That's cool. I understand. But making the comment that "they die like everything else" just isn't a reason for me. So do you have no pets, no plants, no loved ones because "they die like everything else"? I understand the rest of your reasons, just not that one smile

        1. candice5 profile image60
          candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Of course pets etc and plants, but they were here anyway not anything done by me. I just don't particularly like any disturbance to my Lifestyle.

          1. Colebabie profile image59
            Colebabieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            And that doesn't sound selfish? Like I said, I totally understand and respect your lifestyle choice to not have children. Just wondering.

  23. jonwenberg profile image61
    jonwenbergposted 7 years ago

    I never thought it mattered, but now that I have my little girl,I would never trade places with anyone.

    I don't need to have children, but being a dad makes me so much more of who i am. i know myself better now.

  24. kmackey32 profile image82
    kmackey32posted 7 years ago

    I added another sentence scroll up as to my reason why I have kids...

    1. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Thats cool because you have what you want, whereas, I just couldn't handle it. hey neat reading about that stuff you have put  on my post. Re the Internet begging thing.(I wondered if it would get any replies. especially after that guy said it was a Sock Puppet Scam. and he has been mean on this one too.  Just putting an ad in.

      1. kmackey32 profile image82
        kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Im not sure if im having a blonde moment or just stuck thinking lol or what but im confused what guy about a Sock Puppet Scam?

  25. HealthCare Basics profile image83
    HealthCare Basicsposted 7 years ago

    I was married at one time, and had two wonderful girls during my marriage. Since the divorce, I have only had contact with one of my children twice in nearly eight years. There is not one day that goes by that I do not think about them and hope one day they can forgive me for leaving what they thought was a good marriage. If you have no children, or do not want children, then you may never know how a child can bring you to a grounded point in your life.

    1. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Never had never miss.
      I would miss the Nightlife and the travel, and the Clothes I am the material girl, and make no apologies.

    2. Ambition profile image76
      Ambitionposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      thats true only children can bring a new meaning to our lives.

      Although, i don't have any( i m not married even) but as a psychology expert i can understand the happiness a child can bring

  26. embitca profile image86
    embitcaposted 7 years ago

    I don't have kids. Never had any interest in having my own, though I like some other people's kids well enough. The whole idea that you'd die without your kids or live for your kids (like my mother seems to do) is just odd to me. How about living for you? I love the freedom of my life.

    I think the first time I said I wasn't interested in having children, I was a teenager. Everyone always said, "oh you'll change your mind," "you're young," blah blah blah. But some of us never actually change our minds. I'm in my mid-40s now and don't regret it a bit.

    The only annoying thing about not having children is the fact that nearly everyone who does thinks you are, 1.) selfish, 2.) missing out on something, 3.) unfulfilled, 4.) lacking meaning in your life, etc. Just pick a number.

    1. candice5 profile image60
      candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I have had all that shite too! They are usually people, that regreat having no Life. KMackey doesn't say don't have any she just says She is happy having them. I wonder about the ones that want to foist them on the rest of us.
      More and more aren't bothering these days.

    2. kmackey32 profile image82
      kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Im confused, I have kids but I don't feel I have no freedom because I have them.. Everyone has there own path I guess. Some just feel the need to nurture.

      1. candice5 profile image60
        candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Its cool you just see things differently, and you like kids, what we don't like are the pressurerizersa ( have spelt it wron I know) that think everyone has to be the same.

  27. Colebabie profile image59
    Colebabieposted 7 years ago

    My aunt chose to not have children. She is a behavioral specialist and works with special needs children. I do not think that she is selfish, is missing out, unfulfilled or is lacking meaning. Not at all. She is the exact opposite of all of those. The reason that parents say they "live for their children" is because once you have children it isn't about you anymore. It just isn't. They of course live for themselves, and should take care of themselves of course, but their children will always be first.

    1. kmackey32 profile image82
      kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I have never felt that anything was about me before I had kids.

      1. Misha profile image76
        Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Kristie, how could that be?

        1. kmackey32 profile image82
          kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          hmmm Idk maybe because im always trying to take care of someone. ya know..

          1. Colebabie profile image59
            Colebabieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            But you had to have done things for you at one point or another. School? Certifications? Career?

      2. embitca profile image86
        embitcaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        So basically you are contradicting what Colebabie is saying. You really had nothing to live for before you had children? That is really what I meant when I said, "live for their children."

        I totally agree that parents need to put their children's needs first, but if your entire live revolves around your children, if it holds no purpose besides being a parent, I think that is something entirely different than simply putting the needs of the vulnerable first. That's the thing I'm not capable of understanding.

        .

        1. Misha profile image76
          Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Em, you have your own purpose, Kristie has her own. At least at that moment her life seems to be about bringing up kids. I would say it's a worthy goal. Good parenting is a full time job and then some, ya know smile

          1. kmackey32 profile image82
            kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

            My entire life doesn't revolve around them. Although my life does include them. I am a wife, a daughter, a sister, and a CNA. My life revolves around many things......Psss my kids are first though. lol I will always feel a need to protect them..

            1. Misha profile image76
              Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

              OK, sorry, I should have said "mostly about" wink

              1. kmackey32 profile image82
                kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

                Scroll up. i added they are first though. lol

        2. kmackey32 profile image82
          kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          No Im not saying I had nothing to live for before them. I live for them now ofcourse and would do almost anything for them to a point and want the best for them but if lets say I couldn't have children, I am a person who has a need to nurture and help people, it makes me feel good,  so I am still a CNA.. Understand me?

          1. embitca profile image86
            embitcaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            Yes, that makes sense. You will admit, I think, that your initial statement sounded a little off smile

            1. kmackey32 profile image82
              kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

              Oh sorry. Ya know some people are made to have children and care for them and some arent. I know this all too well as my mother should have never had kids. smile Although I think I turned out ok, thank god.

    2. embitca profile image86
      embitcaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      You are in a very small minority. Believe me on this one. I do wonder if you would feel the same if she'd chosen a more self-oriented career. You've gone out of your way to qualify her as someone who is fulfilled by virtue of her selfless job.

      As someone who doesn't have children, who has never wanted them, I hear it all the time. And like other prejudices, it isn't always stated directly.

      1. Colebabie profile image59
        Colebabieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Even if she had another career I would feel this way. However I fail to think of many "self-oriented careers". In any case, one is satisfied with their lives based primarily on family and career, are they not? Usually it is helping others that gives out lives meaning. I know others that do not have children. And again, they live meaningful unselfish lives.

        1. Anam Cara999 profile image59
          Anam Cara999posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          I do not understand portraying those who have no children as 'selfish.'  The opposite can be true.  There is something a bit selfish inherently about wanting to create a replica of yourself, isn't there?

          It's just another silly cultural stereotype that you must have children "to be fulfilled."

          1. kmackey32 profile image82
            kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

            I don't think everyone feels this way about people who have no kids. I don't. Some people give back in other ways. I honestly wish I would have waited later in life to have my kids. But things happen for a reason and everyone is here for a reason. We all have some destiny for are life. Oh man, now I feel like im preaching and I hate the religious forums. lol

        2. embitca profile image86
          embitcaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          That's great that you think that way. I am just saying that many people with children do not think that way. But you don't need to prove that you do. I believe you. I wish more people felt like you do, including my mother smile

          I don't think my life's satisfaction revolves around family and career. I love my family, but my life doesn't revolve around them. As for career, that has always just been about money - a means to an end, a job really. I basically work long enough to amass enough cash to quit and travel. This isn't to say that I've hated every job I have had. I liked most of them, but they weren't my life's fulfillment. My whole reason for working for myself now is to give me more freedom to travel, though there is certainly satisfaction in writing and finding that it pays the bills.

          If I were pressed, I'd say my life's satisfactions revolve around my traveling - to see new things, to witness great natural beauty (God's direct hand upon the world), to wander through bustling cities, to meet new people.

          And there's lots of other stuff I love too, but hardly any of them have anything to do with family or career.

      2. Misha profile image76
        Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Not on my side though, I am always blunt tongue

        1. embitca profile image86
          embitcaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Yes, we know tongue

  28. kmackey32 profile image82
    kmackey32posted 7 years ago

    I had to think back because I had my first child at 17. lol

    1. Misha profile image76
      Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      LOL And you don't remember what was before? wink

      1. kmackey32 profile image82
        kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I was in high school. I can remember protecting my brother a lot when I was a child because he always got in trouble because he wasn't very smart. So I would hide his progress reports so my mother didn't find out. lol I am 33 now you know. Were talking almost 16 years ago...

        1. Misha profile image76
          Mishaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          So your kids is really your life. You are a cool mom Kristie smile

          1. kmackey32 profile image82
            kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

            lol hell yea of course. They are now the most important..

  29. Lisa HW profile image83
    Lisa HWposted 7 years ago

    SweetiePie, I am sure that people can live absolutely fulfilled lives without having children.  I think it can be a little more difficult for someone who wants children and can't/doesn't have them; but even they build their own fulfilling lives after adjusting to the idea of not having children.  People who don't want to have children have their reasons, and I don't think anyone who doesn't want something is going to feel less fulfilled if he doesn't get what he doesn't want.  smile

    1. embitca profile image86
      embitcaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Exactly smile

      You don't miss what you never desired.

  30. girly_girl09 profile image77
    girly_girl09posted 7 years ago

    I really want one or two, but not until I've accomplished my career goals. If I'm not married with kids by the time I'm 35, I'll adopt. I'm very motherly and absolutely love children. I could not imagine not having kids someday.

    Scary to think about because it's only 13 years away now....lol I better get cracking. lol

  31. earnestshub profile image87
    earnestshubposted 7 years ago

    Not all people have a choice to get pregnant when they want a child of their own, and it is heartbreaking.
    On the other side what if a child enters your life in some other way. I took on someone else's 6 year old when I was fifty.
    Children fulfill something deep inside some people.

    1. Ambition profile image76
      Ambitionposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      true

  32. Colebabie profile image59
    Colebabieposted 7 years ago

    Yeah I don't know anyone who feels that way either. I mean I know you guys aren't making it up, but it may not be as prevalent as you think maybe. Like I said, I don't know anyone.

  33. Moonchild60 profile image84
    Moonchild60posted 7 years ago

    My best friend from childhood never had any interest in children.  She was an A student her whole life, went to college, became a psychologist, always played by the rules, married and never had children.  Suddenly in her late 30's she left her marriage for another woman and became a heroin addict.  She died in February at the age of 45.   I often wondered if her life would have gone differently had she had children or even just one child.  If there were someone she had put before herself. Of course, we can never know if she would have done that, but knowing her as well as I did, I am sure she would have.  She knew what a good mom was, she had one.  I always wanted children (I have 2) what I never wanted was a husband (also had 2).  Children are great, husbands not so much...My brother always wanted children and his wife does not.  I keep waiting to see how this destroys the marriage.  Right now she is 30 and he is 35...as he creeps closer to middle age the resentment should set in.  I think its okay if people don't want children but they should marry other people who don't want children.  Children are such a tremendous responsibility and amount of time and work, atleast if you are trying to do your job well.  Anyone not commited to that is right to decide that perhaps its best not to have them.  I respect their decision.

    1. kmackey32 profile image82
      kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Hmm so interesting sometimes my kids keep me in check. I don't do things because of them...

    2. embitca profile image86
      embitcaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      This is exactly what I'm talking about. Gee, if only she'd had a kid, her life would have been so much better because without one she was selfish. For all you know, if she'd had a kid, she could have left that child an orphan. There are plenty of parents addicted to crack and heroin. There are children born addicted to both substances.

      A child isn't some kind of miracle cure to the things that are lacking in your life. The parents who treat them like they are are just as selfish as anyone who decides not to be bothered.

      1. kmackey32 profile image82
        kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Hmm when I read this I thought, Thank god she didnt have kids!!!

      2. Moonchild60 profile image84
        Moonchild60posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I am not saying her life would have been better if she had a child, I was wondering if it would have suddenly taken the same turn as it did. Would she have left her husband for this other woman and get involved in Heroin if she had a child?  Would she have been different, acted differently?  I am not saying her life would have been perfect and she would have made all the right choices had she had a child.  I am just wondering if it would have made a difference.

  34. kmackey32 profile image82
    kmackey32posted 7 years ago

    omg you guys are turning me religious. DID you read what I posted. lol

  35. 0
    Leta Sposted 7 years ago

    I think it has to do sometimes with what parents think will be fulfilling for their sons or daughters.  Traditional mothers think their daughters should have children, just as they have had, and put pressure on them.  I think the 'selfish' idea surrounding childless people will become more and more a thing of the past as cultural stereotypes are adjusted.

    1. kmackey32 profile image82
      kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Yea me too. I don't want that for my own daugher's. I want them to full fill there life to the fullest first.. I hope they dont have children at such a young age and make a life for themselves first..

      1. 0
        Leta Sposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        But there is nothing wrong with having kids, either.  My sister has 2...they are good kids; her older son a straight A student.  She took her role as a parent seriously & it produced good results!  I've got nothing but respect for that.

        1. SweetiePie profile image82
          SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          My sister had kids really young, starting at eighteen, but she seems really happy with her life choices.  My nephew and niece are both ten and seven and they are wonderful and beautiful children.  I love them a lot, and even if I never have kids I have always had the experience of being around them smile.

  36. blue dog profile image79
    blue dogposted 7 years ago

    as the world's population approaches 7 billion, as the world's natural resources are depleted at an alarming rate - here we'll throw in native habitat/vegetation, glaciers, prime farm land being overrun with ugly box houses, fresh water supplies (the next great war) - and as civilization inches its way up the extinction chart, it's rather ironic to see a society hellbent on spaying and neutering pets, while the light stays green on the issue of procreation.

    were the sad and sorry and sordid details ever made public, it would be safe to say there are probably as many unwanted children as there are unwanted pets.

  37. embitca profile image86
    embitcaposted 7 years ago

    I think, "Thank God she didn't have kids!" is exactly the right reaction big_smile

  38. chucky12 profile image61
    chucky12posted 7 years ago

    No kids, I inherited a delinquint, hes drinkin tonite, drinks most night.
    I told my missus hes a waste of space.
    had the best education, best of everything, and still a mindless Moron.

    1. 0
      dennisemattposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Who are you? Not trying to be mean, but..you joined 7 hours ago, you have no hubs...just a bunch of complainy posts about how much you cant stand your "woman" cuz she drinks so much. now her kid too? Arent you a truck driver? are you driving while typing on a laptop?

      1. kmackey32 profile image82
        kmackey32posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        That's sad to talk about a child like that. Its not there fault maybe if you acted like a caring parent and try to help him instead of verbally abusing him, he wouldn't be that way.

      2. chucky12 profile image61
        chucky12posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Yeah I am a Truck driver, and No I was at Home, laxing for the first time in a Month, I don't own a Laptop, I haven't written anything if you read about me you will no that I only joined a few hours ago. Was trying to get the feel of the thing by checking out the various personalities on here.
        Didn't expect a tellin off so soon in the Peace.
        Sorry if I have done something to annoy you, but it was a thing I could identify with. Do you want to look at My Drivers Licen se.  You don't know me so you'll be none the wiser. Not to put to finer point on it but I cleared off yesterday, so I was fed up. They are someone elses problem now NOT MINE.

        1. flread45 profile image82
          flread45posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          You are not helping your family much by ridiculing them,that way.

  39. Mobile Phones profile image60
    Mobile Phonesposted 7 years ago

    Did you REALLY Asked your HEART? If yes, you are an exception.

    http://hubpages.com/x/hub_32.gif cool http://hubpages.com/x/hub_32.gif

    1. Uninvited Writer profile image83
      Uninvited Writerposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      A lot of people don't want kids and there is nothing wrong or unnatural about that. Not everyone believe the same as you do.

  40. Gypsy Willow profile image80
    Gypsy Willowposted 7 years ago

    Be careful! I have several friends with good careers who panicked when their biological clock started running out and had all sorts of expensive treatment to get pregnant.

  41. emievil profile image84
    emievilposted 7 years ago

    Wow when I left this post last night, it was like only one page. Now it has six pages!

    I just came back from a party where I was told to have my own kids because it's always different if you have your own. Arrrggghhh! This is the type of question that can really put pressure on anyone to have kids. If I'm meant to have kids, I'm meant to have them even if I've already reached 40. If I'm not meant to have kids, then even if I go to other hospitals / other countries just to get  myself treated and get pregnant, I will never get pregnant. I have already accepted that this is a possibility and with acceptance came contentment.

    1. SweetiePie profile image82
      SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I think adoptive parents can be just as loving as the biological ones.

      1. emievil profile image84
        emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        smile you know you just read my mind. Actually, we're kind of semi-adopting our 2 1/2 year-old niece right now. Not because we want to adopt a child but because it is our way to help my sister, who is her biological mother. I like having her around and, although a lot of people have been telling me that having her will "get" me pregnant, I'm not in a hurry to have my own yet. We're just contented to be surrogate parents right now. smile

        1. SweetiePie profile image82
          SweetiePieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          You may have kids one day, but being a surrogate parent does not mean you will be any less of a good parent. It sounds like you are a very good mother type.

          1. emievil profile image84
            emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            smile About the good mother type, I don't think I am. But thanks for saying that smile.

  42. Karen Banes profile image90
    Karen Banesposted 7 years ago

    Hi SweetiePie
    I have two kids and love my life BUT I absolutly 100% believe that it's possible to live a happy fulfilled life without children. In fact, in an overpopulated world I think choosing not to have children (or considering adopting one of the many unwanted/orphaned children in the world) is a very responsible thing to do. Just my opinion:)

  43. cynthiaalise profile image60
    cynthiaaliseposted 7 years ago

    I do not have kids, however enjoy the time I have with my niece.  It think that these days it takes an entire family to raise a child.

    1. emievil profile image84
      emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      LOL. I absolutely agree.

  44. Shannondoah profile image61
    Shannondoahposted 7 years ago

    He sounds like the reason, but moving on I actually never want children, either, main reason, I no longer am a practising Mormon. I like what i am doing I am 30 now, and couldn't imagine being that old with kids.
    Just me each to their own.

  45. chucky12 profile image61
    chucky12posted 7 years ago

    well great big thank you right back at you the last Couple.
    Firead I inherited a massive problem, and until you try living with it, which will be my first essay on these pages, you just don't know.
    Besides they do a fine job making turkeys of themselves.
    I no longer feature in their environs.
    Shannandoah. Don't want to insult you, But if you don't wan't them either, How do you feel justified in saying that I am the reason.
    I am the reason they drink, I am never there.
    They drunk before I came on the scene, she was doing the AA thing. Last bloke got the blame as well. So nother tellin off for me. Starting to feel at Home here.

  46. Shannondoah profile image61
    Shannondoahposted 7 years ago

    I am Sorry, I just thought that your attitude was a bit on the cruel side.
    But no I have never lived with the effects of alcohol, so I guess I don't know.
    I just read you had moved out also. I think I often am guilty of skip reading.

  47. chucky12 profile image61
    chucky12posted 7 years ago

    Okey Dokey Yah off the Hook then!
    She even abused my moving buddies, with a bottle in her hand.

    1. earnestshub profile image87
      earnestshubposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Glad your out of a bad situation. She does seam to have problems you can't help her with.

      1. chucky12 profile image61
        chucky12posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Yah not kiddin Just been read the riot act by her Girl friend an ex Lawyer from the City.
        So I know what I am going to have to fork out already, and its the weekend Worth it though, Peace o Mind. Glad someone feels for me.

  48. Lockenbar profile image60
    Lockenbarposted 7 years ago

    I enjoy children, providing there're properly cooked.

    1. gmwilliams profile image84
      gmwilliamsposted 3 years ago in reply to this

      Cute wit!

  49. Shadow Jackson profile image75
    Shadow Jacksonposted 3 years ago

    I'm 29 and don't have kids yet. I might one day, but I'm in on rush. My sis just had one and that's good enough for me. lol

 
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