What causes Pre-marital Sex in teens?

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   Lady Guinevereposted 15 years ago

   I just read that some christians believe that music causes pre-marital sex.  Anyone else think this?  What do you think causes pre-marital sex in teens?
   
   When did it become pre-marital sex?  Adam and Eve were never married.  The had children and so forth and so on.  I don't recollect that Noah was married either but he had a wife and they had children.
   Another thought comes to mind too..........are Christians over riding God's initiative of procreation.  In Biblical times girls were married right at or before puberty so that when they did become pregnant it was under marriage.  God put the sex and procreation inside teens for the survival of his plan--who are we to say differently?
   It is natural for teens to have sex because it is from God......................

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      sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      you talking about smooth jazz love baby makin' music or real music?  If you are talking about real music, not a chance that music causes premarital sex.  that is one of the most ridiculous things I have ever heard! 
      
      What could be the cause of premarital sex...
      1.  not wanting to get married could be one.
      2.  lack of self respect (to some degree)
      3.  kids being pushed to grow up too fast,
      4. television influence popularizing sex to well...umm...be popular at a young age.
      5. lack of understanding the consequences of sex at an early age.
      6. I dunno
      
      sure hope my kid doesn't have sex until she is fifty! lol. 
      
      I would actually have to say that the more likely culprit is that kids are watching shows like One Tree Hill (not a bad show, not that I watch it either) which is telling kids that as long as you are pretty,popular, hot or rich, it is ok to have sex. 
      
      Though I wonder why there should even be a debate about teaching sex education at earlier ages. 
      
      What do you think LG, about teaching sex ed to elementary school children?  I think it is a good idea. 
      
      I actually think this would be a good topic for the health forum because I really don't know that this fits well in the religion forum unless that is, you are saying that you believe that because children were being bread at puberty it is ok? 
      
      I really don't think you think that though.  Life was different back then but I do love the question, "when did it change"?
      
      I dunno.

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         Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         It was said that Rock and Roll and other genre's caused teens to have sex.  I know that this shuld also be in the health forum too but since it was religion that brought it up I posted it here.
         
         I do think that teaching about sex in elementary school is a good idea and I think it should be a family thing--like have a parent if not both involved in the clasrooms and workbooks and lessons.  Some parent's are afraid that teaching sex ed will also make them more promiscuious.  Some parent's have no idea what they teach or who it is taught.  It should be a family thing at any rate.

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         Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         Do you really want some random underpaid folk to brainwash your daughter into a bunch of misconceptions about sex? Come on, get real
         
         Only YOU can do this properly

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            sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            Well, I don't think I would have pictures laying around of hepes or that sort of stuff.  Certainly I have my own job to do so you aint wrong there, but I would rather them get as much information as possible so they can make well educated choices. 
            
            Nothing wrong with teaching kids about condoms and unprotected sex without all the hoopla about religion and when it is or isn't ok to have sex.  I am pretty sure that they will do it anyways plus some parents are too ignorant to teach their kids anything about  sex so someone has to.

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               Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

               LOL We have so many disagreements here I don't know where to start. Why don't we just let it go then?

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                  sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                  what?? and end a good discussion before it has begun?  Come on Misha!  Let's show um how it's done. lol.

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                     sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                     p.s.  so you know where I am coming from...my "talk" from my catholic mommy when I had my first period was, "you can have babies now if you get pregnant I will punch you in the stomach." 
                     
                     Probably could have done some good to just tell me how to avoid it, lucky for me I learned in school.  though she might have had some effect since she did manage to terrify me of having babies until I was 27.  lol

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                        Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                        I guess she did not knew any better herself. But you know

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            Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            Did you have Sex Ed in highschool?

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      SparklingJewelposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Trying to speak from an energy stance...in that we are made up of consistently moving atoms, electrons and molecules, physically; and ever flowing Light (chi), spiritually, why is it so hard to believe that sound, music and all that we see doesn't affect us? Seriously folks
      
      I could go into a really long explanation about the nature of sex as kundalini energy, the very essence of life, and the importance of the natural order of the flow of that energy through our beings to sustain us...that the very purpose of life is to accelerate that energy in consonance with the Universal progression, and that baser instincts of sex without appreciation for the consequences is a de-acceleration of energy... do you want me to?

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         Nickny79posted 15 years agoin reply to this

         Please do.  This is a topic that interests me.  Better yet write a hub on it.

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         sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         from that stance, yes music does effect you, but you are asking specifically about premarital sex.  Music does move you and effect the way you feel and can make you feel a little horny or aggressive or relaxed and chill. 
         
         I suppose if we stuck strictly to the topic of premarital sex and music, then maybe we should be talking about subliminal messaging in the music which I do not believe that Bach makes your juices flow but there may be something there if you are talking about maybe rap music that make suggestions about sex and the way some music can make sex sound.  Of course and this is not only just rap music or electectronica or dance or hip hop or rock shucks even gospel could do it if that is what the listener is thinking about. 
         
         Basically, I suppose any music could move you to want to be close to another person, but premarital sex? 
         
         It doesn't help that the legal age to wed is 18.  If it were 16, which is about the time I figure most kids are having sex these days then there would be less premarital engagements but probably even more divorce. lol.
         
         Spiritually speaking there is a connection a chemical response that does happen between two people who are attracted to each other.  There doesn't even have to be a person present to feel the attraction.  Those crazy hormones are triggering neurons to stimulate the body. 
         
         Rules of attraction are not always physical.  Some people are attracted to a thought or an idea, which may very well be where the idea that music causes sex comes from.  All I can say from that point of view is to be a little personal;
         
         I had sexual urges before I ever became interested in music, and that urge started at a really young age.  And this happens in kids.  Read Doc Spock (though given a lot of crap) but it is true that kids start masturbating as early as 3 years old or playing with themselves and it is in the way that the folks act to their children that sets the pattern for the rest of their lives.
         
         Becoming angry with a kid because he is slapping his tally wacker when he is five years old may make him think that sex is taboo or bad when it is just natural.  Plus if this was true about music, then why do doctors prescribe music for aggressive children if aggression is also linked to sexual repressions?

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            Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            Sandra, I too had sexual urges when a child, but music wasn't even a factor in it.  There are those who are having children at much younger ages then we could ever imagine--10 years old.  Was that child ever taught about her very own body and how it works?  I think not!
            Look at all the hype the christian nation did to male masturbation!  They told them that it would cause pimples and even that if they did it their penis would fall off!  They need to get a grip and be logical about it and educate kids on what their bodies are doing not put fear in them if they do something athat is natural.
            In biblical days the age to marry was 12--they didn't have pre-marital sex then----WHY did that change andwhen?  Did they have provacative music then?  I bet they did and that is why they had their girls marry at such a young age.  Song of Soloman in the Bible is very provacative--anyone here ever take the time to read it?

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               kerrygposted 15 years agoin reply to this

               Chances are they married prepubescent girls so premarital sex wouldn't happen, since girls were the property of their father and then their husbands, and a girl who had premarital sex would be unmarriageable and thus a drain on the family's resources for the rest of her life. Similar patterns are evident in places like Afghanistan today.
               
               When the marital age increased, premarital sex happened. A crazy percentage of girls in the early 19th century were pregnant when they got married - as many as 80% by some counts. And those are the ones who DID get married. Illegitimacy was a huge social problem throughout the era, and dating back through the Renaissance, Middle Ages, Ancient Rome, and before.

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   t.keeleyposted 15 years ago

   There baser instincts...certainly not music. I think I've heard that 1950s southern baptist argument before, but only from uber-archaic and set-back fundamentalists.

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      Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Southern Baptis do not allow dancing either--they say it is of Satan.  Though thre be dancing in that Bible!!

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   kerrygposted 15 years ago

   I think teenagers have sex because biology hasn't caught up with society. When the average life expectancy was 30, teenagers needed to be having children. Today, they don't, but the hormones are still as strong as ever. Stronger, in fact, if you consider that the average age of first menarche is 12, when it used to be 16.
   
   I have read an interesting, though very controversial, theory that the current drop in age of puberty may be partly due to sexualized entertainment. After all, you start drooling when you see a photo of a delicious-looking meal. I don't think it's completely unreasonable to think that sort of visual stimulation could be causing some effect, but I doubt it would be strong enough for an epidemic of the magnitude we're currently experiencing, which affects kids from families that ban inappropriate entertainment as much as those from families who don't. Auditory stimulation like music is even less likely, imho.

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      Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Hmmm, I don't remember menarche starting at 16.  Everyone in my school started at between 11 and 13.
      So you think it is the media that makes them want to have sex?

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         Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         After reading your thoughts further--do you think it is more prevalent now because of the death rate going up?

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   Mishaposted 15 years ago

   No, according to one famous lady, we did not have sex back in USSR. And were proud of this
   
   What was the point in teaching something we did not have?

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      Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

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      sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      where did all the babies come from?
      lol 

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         Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         Everybody had a guess, but nobody knew for sure

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   Mishaposted 15 years ago

   LOL Sandy, we'll get way off-topic then.
   
   Cause I strongly believe that schools in their current form are more "evil" than "good", and state regulated sex education is just a subset of the total "evilness". In other words, your kids have much better chances of becoming happy adults if you teach them personally.

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      sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I think it is ok if it is ok with lady gwen if we get off topic which is spun from the topic.  (Is it ok LG?)
      
      To be fair the current state of the schools is that they are underfunded and forced to bring in knuckle heads...of course that is a whole other topic. 
      
      But like the personal example I gave; my mom did not know better because no one taught her and I can only assume that a lot of parents are just like that.
      
      
      Why do you think schools are evil?

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         Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         It is OK to go off topic!  Sometimes that is the fun of it all and we learn more about each other and different cultures beliefs and much more.  Sooy I need to go to bed.  Got some real pian going on in my belly and took a nightime pain pills.  I do do it often, but I am going to sleep.  Will see you all in the morning and keep it all going!

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            sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            hope you feel better.  you prego?  lol.

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               Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

               No prego--a while bck had Pancretitis and it seemed like I was having another bout.  I am fine now.  So let me get on reading some of this stuff and comment!!

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   mdvaldostaposted 15 years ago

   Umm... cause it's fun? I dunno, kids don't always think things through + it's a primal instinct.

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      sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      it is instinctive but not always fun for the kid who gets knocked up by a horny teenager believing that she and him will be together forever and ever. 
      
      I think the "need" for sex is instictive, but the emotional parts are not.

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   waynetposted 15 years ago

   Bwahahahaha music causes sex before marriage...what next?...films causing masturbation...er moving on!!

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   Mishaposted 15 years ago

   Because they are heavily regulated by state. And state intervention always benefits only state or bureaucracy, never people.

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      sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Well I need some examples.  Maybe that part is true but what about what they teach do you not agree with?  I would think that any information is better than none. 
      
      I guess I am assuming that you are saying that sex ed, whether fundamental or state run for their own private benefits does not not do anything for kids. 
      
      I guess I am asking, what has backfired, what do you think they are teaching them?

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         sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         I think I am going to invite Chef Jeff to this forum, he is a teacher.

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         Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         Well, for a plenty of examples of state "evilness" read the book I linked you to today
         
         Now, ask yourself, what is the purpose of school from a state point of view? What is its main task? What people should it produce? What is a single main characteristic of those people?
         
         It does not really matter what exactly state we are talking about, try some state but USA, so you are not blinded with what you've been brainwashed into yourself

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            sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            LOL, I thought this might have something to do with what you are reading.    I can't speak for other countries I have never been to, I can only talk about what I know or have been "brainwashed" to know.
            
            Anyways, have you ever heard of being brainwashed by anti brainwashing?  Secular reasoning only goes as far as the thinker, lest he be so cynic in himself he loses his own mind. 
            
            The main task is to teach them things that will help them put two and two together, how to conjugate, hypothesize and use their brains.  (so I think) LOL.  To be able to make up their own minds and make choices on their own. 
            
            My dad always said "there is always a consequence, good or bad, there is on for everything you do."

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               Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

               LOL Sandy, I've been brainwashed during my early years much more than you, trust me on this.
               
               And I put quite an effort during later years to get rid of brainwashing results in my mind, and I am still not done with it...
               
               Anyway,
               No, this is what YOU want to be the main goal of school.
               
               From a state point of view its main goal is to produce people that OBEY. Obey what state tells them to do and don't ask uncomfortable questions. Everything else is secondary.
               
               I don't want my kids to become slaves. Do you?
               
               Oh, and I am not going to argue with your dad, he is spot on

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                  sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                  of course I don't want my kids to be slaves, hell no!!!  I don't think I want total anarchy either.  I guess I am having a hard time understanding where you are coming from because my entire eduction was based on asking those uncomfortable questions. 
                  
                  I can't recall anyone ever telling me it was not ok to ask.  Actually on the contrary, we had banners that said "there is no such thing as a stupid question" and "no question is a dumb question", or "ask questions, as many as you can". 
                  
                  On the other hand my mom would say "shut up", "stop asking so many questions", and "that is a stupid question." 
                  
                  Are you seriously getting this stuff from that book?  You are right I wouldn't like it.  LOL.

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   Mishaposted 15 years ago

   LOL Sandy,
   
   All my stuff is my thoughts, I use books only to start, refine, or illustrate them
   
   You missed the point though. Stupid questions are not uncomfortable questions. Uncomfortable questions are something like "why I have to kill that Iraqi guy?" or "how exactly I can affect the government decisions?"

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      sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      well, no, I think you missed the point.  You haven't yet given me any examples other than what you think. 
      
      Kids ask all the time, "why are they killing" it's not an uncomfortable question, it's one they don't really have an answer to.  And "how exactly I can effect the governments decisions", they get told those things but for some reason, there is a counter productive "regime" coming from other sources such as parents and jaded american's or otherwise that are saying, "it doesn't work". 
      
      So tell me, is it really the "evil" government run education system or is it something else?

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    Mishaposted 15 years ago

    Looks like we are talking different languages Sandy. I guess my delivery skills suck as usual
    
    Let's leave it for now, I don't really feel I can explain my point to you at that moment. May be some other "cynic" will chime in and make it more comprehensible, otherwise we'll get back to this later

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    C. C. Riterposted 15 years ago

    I think many of you got way off point here, ya'll went off on tangent. I remember when I was an adolescent, I had no control over my 'wee man'. He'd just arise at any ol' time he wanted to. Many times I had to hide it in school. We wore tight pants in those days too. My God how embarrassing to be called to the blackboard with an erection!
    All a girl had to do was touch me and the 'wee man' would start. I don't know how a young girl feels or what they go through, but when one has those raging hormones and all that testosterone flowing it is very hard (pardon the pun) to have any control.
    Come to think of it, that lasted with me for 40 years! ;-)
    That is why teens have sex!

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    CorruptionAmericaposted 15 years ago

    Thats  funny "what causes pre-marital sex in teens" huh...like its a disease or something.

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    Poppa Bluesposted 15 years ago

    What "causes" premarital sex? I suppose it's the lack of will to fight the instinct! We are driven to sex! Everything we do in life has a sexual component. The drive for riches is based in sex, in finding and obtaining the most desirable mates! Mother nature is a persistent and patient master and her will, must be served!

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       Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       I am not sure about that.  It sounds like you are using the same conclusions as Freud and I think he was nuttier than a nut cake!

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    SparklingJewelposted 15 years ago

    Well, since I am not feeling well enough to put in the long version of energy, sex and the kundalini...I will say that karma is the reason for premarital sexual behavior.
    
    In order for us to bring our total being's vibration up to speed with the progress of  universal order, we have to learn to understand how to use our own individual energy in consonance with that universal order.
    
    Originally the marriage concept was an intuitive commitment of one male and one female with the purpose being for them to learn to complement each other and create the balance of Tao, the yin/yang energy, to promote and advance the human race. there were no legal human laws, just a natural intuitive connection.
    
    And we have seen where the human race has taken that...;0

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       Lady Guinevereposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       Thank you SparklingJewel.  Religions tell us that sex is bad and that our bodies are of Satan and must be covered up---see where that gets us----in deep trouble!

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       sandra rinckposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       I actually still consider marriage to be this way.  Thanks Jewels.    Feel better!

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