nursing in public

1. 61

   momo6kids1968posted 14 years ago

   why is it so hard for society (some,not all),to accept nursing in public. When will people understand that nursing our babies  is how babies were nourished way before bottles/formula were thougt of.I know some think as us nursers as flashers or obscene,but in reality we feel we have the right to nurse wherever we feel the need to.My issue is,i covered and some still found what i was doing offensive and nasty,there was no way anyone could see whayt i was doing,yet some bully still felt the need to confront me on it.Just to let you know,not all nursers say to hell with everyone some of us like to be dicreet,but when the baby gets bigger and mobile it is hard to not show something,not necessarily skin,again,the last thing some of us want is the attention,we try to go off to the side somewhere,not the restroom!Being away from others made me more relaxed,it takes alot of courage to nurse in public.We need support not damnation.

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      Kadmielsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I don;t mind watching you feed your baby, if you look good ill be jealous more then anything

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         momo6kids1968posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         can i cyber slap u?

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      melbelposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      The other day a woman from my town was kicked out of Olive Garden for nursing in public. It makes me not want to go to Olive Garden, really, it does. It is a right and I hate to see people's rights get crapped on.

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      momo6kids1968posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      i agree not all places are meant for babies/children,but what about airports,fast food restaraunts,i was invited a to an event being held by a local hospital,very fancy,i found a very helpful lady who allowed me to sit in an unused meeting room,because the table was crowded,and i did;nt like to offend people,but i never fed my son in a bathroom.

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      csd1509posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      i am nursing in public and don't see any problem with that.
      of course i try to "hide" any flesh , i always have with me in the nursery bag a large bib that i use to cover up and even if sometimes i don't , if you have selfrespect and deceny you won't wip out your breast and  show your whole "milkfactory) like i have seen women do which i think is discusting .
      
      Just act normal and people will respect what you're doing
      i nursed two kids for a couple of months and also a lot in public.. people have never had a problem with me.

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   Uninvited Writerposted 14 years ago

   I have nothing against it. It's not like women who are nursing whip them out for all to see

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   gamergirlposted 14 years ago

   I think nursing in public is just fine, nobody complains when kittens sidle up to momma cat for a meal, it's the same thing for babies and mothers of the human sort.

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4. 62

   Mishaposted 14 years ago

   I for one enjoy it

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      megs78posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Then you would LOVE Ontario, Canada, where it is legal for women to walk around topless! Of course, only if weather permits seeing as its as cold as a witches tit in these here parts...

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         Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         I think I would love European Mediterranean beaches much more, due to the climate.

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            megs78posted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Yeah, me too...

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5. 0

   Crazdwriterposted 14 years ago

   I am totally okay with it and I know when I have my own babies I'll be doing the same thing. Those who have a problem with it can kiss my you know what.
   
   I say do what you have to do to keep your babies healthy whether ppl don't like it or not.

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6. 49

   badcompany99posted 14 years ago

   Who cares, tis only a round piece of flesh, like hardly something to get excited about !

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      beautyroseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I think the issue here is that teenager girls and boys are giggling when they saw woman breast feeding making them realize that the most important use of breast is for breast feeding not daddy feeding.
      
      Maybe that's why your conscious too cause most folks only know breast during romance and not to save hungry babies in which the sole purpose of it is food for the infant.

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7. 70

   Plants and Oilsposted 14 years ago

   But... but... it's not natural! A baby shouldn't be drinking the sterile, fresh, perfect-temperature milk produced to nourish a human baby.
   
   It's far MORE natural for the baby to drink over-processed, powdered milk produced to feed baby cows from a plastic bottle!

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      badcompany99posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Get real its totally natural its how mankind started out, that is such a daft thing to say !

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      Crazdwriterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      LOL Plants and oils. that was a funny remark

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      tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        I love cynicism!

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         badcompany99posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Theres a surprise

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8. 56

   mugshotposted 14 years ago

   I think a person can accept things easily, people as in society get hysterical over the most stupid things.
   
   breast feeding is perfectly natural and I for one see no problem with it.

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9. 81

   RooBeeposted 14 years ago

   I'll never cease to be amazed at some of the beautiful things deemed "dirty" by some factions of society, while other very unnatural (IMO) things are totally acceptable and even seen as "more normal" a' la' what Plants & Oils said.
   I breastfed my child as discreetly as possible when in public, but I would certainly not deny my baby timely nourishment so as not to offend some prudish type. What are they doing gawking at m' lady parts anyhoo??

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      Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I could stare at your lady parts a whole day long

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         Crazdwriterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         LMAO Misha are you trying to get cyber slapped?

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            Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Nope, for people who are more or less active on forums I know who would appreciate such jokes, and who would take offense. RooBee is one of the wisest women around, you'll see when you know her better. And quite pretty, too

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               Crazdwriterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               D@mn why is everyone always trying to ruin my fun hehehe I was looking for a nice cyber slap through the computer  you know like *SLAP* hehehe

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10. 60

    tksenseiposted 14 years ago

    http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,541 … latestnews

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11. 56

    yoshi97posted 14 years ago

    I think jealousy plays a major role in this one ...
    
    Personally, I would be more offended by baby cows drinking human milk!

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12. 67

    arthritickneeposted 14 years ago

    It made me mad when my wife was feeding, how members of the public made her so self conscious and stressed while feeding. She was no fan of getting everything out and was as discreet as possible, she just wanted the best for our girl.
    
    Mothers aren't exhibitionists, they are nurturing people caring for their child.
    
    Society needs to grow up a little.

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       yoshi97posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I couldn't agree more ...

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       Plants and Oilsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       And a screaming, yelling, hungary and pissed off infant is far more disruptive than a quietly-feeding one.

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          momo6kids1968posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          i too was discreet,but slobs kept upsetting me the same way,apparently these same people must be baby haters too,why else would they upset a defenseless baby,me i defeneded myself,not to prove it's our right,only to give back what the ahole gave to me

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    AsherKadeposted 14 years ago

    some husbands like a taste too...

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       Leta Sposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Oooohhhhh...TMI, TMI!
       
       Well, my actual take on the post topic is varied...  A few years ago, when I was in Iowa City, IA, there was a big case that made the papers where a woman was breast feeding in an upscale restaurant right at the dining table in the center of the dining room.  There was a big scuffle when other patrons asked her to stop or to go to the hallway or the restroom to feed the baby.
       
       Personally, I don't have an issue with women who want to nurse in public, as long as they are discreet about it.  I think this scenario went over the top a bit...it disturbed the other guests...and resulted in a big scene.  There are just some things you don't do while at the dinner table in public in a fine dining atmosphere.  Undressing might be one of them.  Potty training your child might be another, standing up in the middle of the room and talking to the entire crowd might be another.
       
       Don't worry, .  IC is a very feminist place, and she had vocal support.  I just don't completely think they were right in this case.

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          yoshi97posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          And you think it's fair the baby has to sit and wait for his or her meal while others eat?  j/k

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14. 80

    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    Not trying to discourage breast feeding and all, but the restroom, or room designated for that are good alternatives.  Also, a woman could pump her milk and put in a bottle, and many actually do this for public situations.  As for the fine dining scenario I am not even sure why someone would take a baby into that environment.  Not trying to say do not do it, but I would think getting a sitter might be more enjoyable.

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       Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Do you eat in the restroom?

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          SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          My personal opinion is taking a baby to a fine dining restaurant would not be enjoyable anyway.  I used to babysit for people that wanted a couples night out, so they could spend time together for a change without worrying about the kids.

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             Leta Sposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             Agreed.  Kids don't belong EVERYWHERE.  R movies might be another example...
             
             You can't usually smoke in the nonsmoking section at a fine restaurant, either, or generally disturb other people.  What if, for instance, somebody decided they had to dress a wound that exposed themselves (all for the good, and necessary, too) in the middle of dinner?

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                SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                Glad some people get what I mean .  A lady once took her baby with her see Titanic at ten at night, and the poor thing was crying the whole time.  I actually did not mind as that is her choice, but some people kept staring at her.

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                   Leta Sposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                   Well, yes.  I know kids are always supposed to be cute and all, but that would annoy me.
                   
                   And I'd never do it, either.  And I >might< breastfeed in public, but I definitely would be discreet about it...for my own sake.  It isn't a public thing...  I felt the same way when I worked with this guy who wanted to bring in his video of his wife giving birth to their kid to the office.  Uhhh, yeah.

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             Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             You are dodging the question.
             
             And no, Olive garden is not a "fine" restaurant, at least not how I understand fine dining and how olive garden is in DC area. It is definitely not a McDonalds, yet it is a far cry from Ruth Chris for example.
             
             As for the babies and dining out - can be quite enjoyable, and can be miserable, it really depends on many things, including if baby is hungry or not.

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                SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                First off you are mixing my comments.  I never implied the Olive Garden was fine dining, and I am not that thick.  Sorry you think I am.  My comment about the Olive Garden was actually not related.  Stop mixing and stop inferring.  Anyway, I have nothing more to say on this topic as I am tired of people inferring things lol.  Let people be.

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                   Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                   Absolutely, this was not me who proclaimed babies should be pushed to restrooms to be fed.
                   
                   Let people be.

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                      SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                      I was talking more about what I would do.  You who deems to know all lol. Anyway, be it me you give a hard time to because I am not cool and hip.  I never was, and you always look out for me to give a hard time to.  It is so old, stale as toast.

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                         Leta Sposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                         You're savvy in that you recognize there are fine points to manners.  It isn't just about 'what's cool' and all and what everybody else says..  In fact, having no awareness of boundaries is the opposite--that's what is uncool.

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                            SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                            Boundaries can be a good thing, but maybe that makes me an elitist .

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       Plants and Oilsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       They aren't good alternatives at all. Leaving a place and going to feed a baby in a toilet is not much fun.
       
       And expressing milk is much harder than breastfeeding.

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          SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          This is what I will do if I ever had a baby.  You do not have to do it, but I have friends that do this.  Some of us do not feel comfortable breast feeding in public, and just as you are free to, we are free not too.  Some women cannot even breast feed physically, and it makes them feel bad when other mothers tell them they are not as good for bottle feeding.

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             yoshi97posted 14 years agoin reply to this

             In my opinion, it's only bad if you refuse to feed your baby.
             
             What many mothers see as bad is the breaking of the physical mother/child bond, whereas a breastfed child will feel closer to their mother. To that I say, allow the mother who choses not to breastfeed their child to hold their child when they are hungry, which they naturally do, as you don't hook a baby up to a bottle and walk away.
             
             Of course, once the baby learns to hold the bottle, the mother will allow them to do so ... and I think this is the real schism these parents are speaking of .. where a mother will see the bottle as a substitute for their warmth and love, offering little affection.
             
             Are we to call them bad parents for this? I'm not so sure ... Some parents never received a lot of affection when they were children, so it's difficult to break that cycle. If someone discovers they are such a parent, then they owe it to themselves to give as much as they emotionally can, doing their best to break the cycle passed on through their lineage.
             
             I don't see these parents as evil or bad, I see them as emotionally unready - but as I said - once they discover this to be the truth, they can cure this on their own by making more time for holding baby, and in time, it will become less self-forced and more enjoyed .. breaking the pattern handed down.
             
             Also, I have found that children born without siblings often (not always) have trouble expressing their love to their children. I'm sure there is a logical explanation for this, though I haven't looked it up ... I've just made this observation from looking at parents over the years ... those who came from large families and those who came from small ones. Again, it isn't an exact truth ... just something I have observed.

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             Plants and Oilsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             Of course you can do it, as other women do. But it is harder, and there is also the problem of supply and demand, and your breasts getting full of milk and feeling uncomfortable.

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                Davinagirl3posted 14 years agoin reply to this

                People have the right not to breast feed if they don't want to, but those of us who do shouldn't be punished for feeding our children.  My daughter wouldn't drink from a bottle, at all.  I was in a Chinese restaurant once, and baby started crying.  I think the people would rather I fed her than her crying through their meal.

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                   Plants and Oilsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                   I'd hope so.

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       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I had the challenge of being a mom nursing twins.  It was difficult, as being discreet is more challenging in this scenario.  Try as you may to be prepared with a bottle, you can't always foresee your baby's needs (during growth spurts they can be ravenous).  Plus, many people can't afford the luxury of a babysitter, especially with multiple children.  No doubt, that's an ideal situation, but not always feasible.
       
       I got tired of living around society's issues with me nursing my children.  I initially went through a lot of effort to nurse in my van, the bathroom, or any other hidden place.  I got sick of it, it disrupted my life, and I decided to REVOLT and feed my babies where and when I wanted.  I did get a few looks.  I did get to say:  "I'm not sure how this affects YOU" to irritated onlookers.  I find it appalling that providing sustenance for my children was frowned upon.

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          Davinagirl3posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Anyone who looks at a nursing mother as anything but a mother giving nourishment to a baby, is a sicko.  They need help.

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             SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             Both of you have distorted my words.  I never said I was against breast feeding, it is just not something I would do.  Also, my mother worked and she was not able to breast feed, and we have a very close relationship.  I think both sides can be judgmental about this issue, in my opinion.  Personally I do not look at women breast feeding, but those who breast feed should not assume all women want to, or even can.  As I shared I did have friends who were physically unable to produce milk and breast feed their children, and they actually had women tell them they were not as good of mothers.

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                Davinagirl3posted 14 years agoin reply to this

                To be honest, I was not talking about your post, at all.  I was just generalizing about people who have a problem with women who breastfeed.  I don't get the impression that you have a problem with thinking breastfeeding is "obscene".  I didn't notice that you had a post with WordScribe's until after I posted.  I didn't mean to lump you into that statement. I apologize.

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    4. 61

       Valerie Fposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Even expressed breast milk is not an equal substitute for nursing. Breast milk comes in thinner at first to quench a baby's thirst, then thicker to address the hunger. Would you like it if you ordered a meal and a drink and the waitress proceeded to dump your drink into your lunch and serve it to you that way? Secondly, babies who are bottle fed are at higher risk of developing nipple confusion, which interferes with nursing and sometimes ends it. Finally, some babies refuse to take bottles at all, so bringing a bottle, let alone hiring a babysitter is not a viable option for a new mother who might want to have lunch with her friends or something resembling a date with her husband now and then.

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          momo6kids1968posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          i agree! my son refused the bottle,and it was to upsetting and mean to have kept forcing him to the bottle,plus bottles do have chemicals in them,and my body refused to supply what my son needed.

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       momo6kids1968posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       i would have loved to have a babysitter,for 5 kids!we arenot recluses you know,and i would of slapped the hell out of some one for mentioning the bathroom,not of all of us pump,to me that's just another way society rules us,as far as dining out,we can do that.

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    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    I really do not care if women breast feed in public, but I would carry a bottle because that is just me.  Another thing I find funny is when people swear how breast feeding is always better, and that is what the best moms do.  Not all women can breastfeed, so they should not be made to feel bad just because they are unable to do so.
    
    As for the Olive Garden I would not go there anyway.  They boycotted the Letterman show after the Sarah Palin jokes, which shows how uptight they can be.

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16. 81

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    I have no problem with babies taking on food when needed anywhere.

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    Leta Sposted 14 years ago

    No....I'M talking 5 star rating, $$$ with well-known chefs, etc.
    
    Olive Gardens are so bustling you probably wouldn't even notice...

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       SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       My comment was not about the Olive Garden being fine dining, which I do not believe it is.  Misha implied I thought this, but all I was saying about that establishment is that it is somewhere I would not eat.  I was referring to the other poster, but he inferred many things in my comment.  I really get bored with that lol.

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18. 62

    Mishaposted 14 years ago

    Love you both

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    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    Love you too Misha .  You are always there to give one a hard time.  Guess it is sort of sexy lol.

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20. 56

    yoshi97posted 14 years ago

    No love for Yoshi ... *sigh*

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       Leta Sposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Poooor Yoshi! aaaah, xxxoooo, lol

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    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    Love you Yoshi!

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    yoshi97posted 14 years ago

    Thank ya ladies

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    jiberishposted 14 years ago

    Funny how it's ok to see big breasted woman in tiny little shirts, with everything hanging out, or short shorts which don't leave anything to the imagination, while it's offensive to see a woman breast feeding a child in public, which is natural.  Most woman cover themselves up and you see very little of the breast. It's ok to see billboards, and advertisements and magazines with half naked woman, but breast feeding is somehow denegrating.  Double standards? I think yes, people show grow up.

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    Davinagirl3posted 14 years ago

    I breast fed my daughter, and I breast fed her in public.  When my baby was hungry, she ate.  No one ever dared to say anything.  I would have let them have it, if they had.  Fear and hatred of the female body makes me sick.  It takes a pervert to think that nursing your child is obscene.

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    Plants and Oilsposted 14 years ago

    Wow, full marks for breastfeeding twins! That can't have been easy, well done.

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       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Thanks, did it for 10 months.   
       
       I agree with Davina, my babies would have NOTHING to do with bottles.  I tried, since I wanted to be able to be away from them for a spell, but they would have none of that.

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    Plants and Oilsposted 14 years ago

    One baby at once is quite enough for me, and 10 months is amazing. How old are they now?

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    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    No, maybe I am just being too sensitive on this issue, but I guess I should keep my opinions to myself on some things.  Honestly I was just sharing the experience some other people had with breast feeding.  I can see you were being more general, but it was kind of irritating to have two people in a row quote me and say how breast feeding in public is so much better, when I never told them they could not do that in the first place.  Because my opinion was the divergent one it was seen as unpopular.

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       Davinagirl3posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I know plenty of people who wouldn't breast feed in public.  My best friend didn't breast feed at all, and I think she took a lot of flack from other mothers about it.  It is a personal choice.  Whether your choice is to do it, or not, it should be up to you.

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          SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          You are very understanding about it Davina .

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       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I didn't mean to make you feel like I was attacking you at all.  Sorry about that.  I just wanted to point out that babysitters aren't always a possibility and that breasfeeding in the bathroom really sucks.
       
       The rest of the points weren't geared towards you at all.  I totally agree it's an individual choice.  By no means, do I think breast-feeding is the only way.  I was talking to the people in the public at large who find it offensive.  I know you don't feel that way about it. 

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          SweetiePieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          I see you were talking more about a general situation.  I am glad you enjoy breast feeding, and it is cool so many mothers are back into it .

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    Plants and Oilsposted 14 years ago

    I don't think mothers should be giving each other flak at all.
    
    There is, however, no doubt that formula feeding is worse for babies than breast feeding.

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    nikki1posted 14 years ago

    If you breastfeed discreetly.. its a natural thing
    Babies have to eat.

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    LondonGirlposted 14 years ago

    I fed my son when he needed feeding. He was a baby, I was his mother, what else were we supposed to do?
    
    I got one negative comment, once, and far more positive ones. But mostly, people didn't notice.

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    rajalakshmyposted 14 years ago

    It depends on the mind of the people looking at

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    Specialk3749posted 14 years ago

    I'm amazed that people would complain about a mother nursing her infant in public.  Usually, when a mother covers herself or lets her shirt hang down, there is barely anything showing.  Do we hear people complaining when a women is seen in a bikini?  Or how about the cleavages of shirts nowadays?  There is definatly more exposed in those than when nursing!  Our society is so backward!

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       Ivorwenposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Just what I was thinking!  If people are going to make a stink about a baby being fed, then they should have the nerve to walk up to EVERY woman wearing a low cut shirt and complain! 
       
       Personally I nursed my babies when they needed it, regardless of where I was or who was around.  Did my best to be discreet, and most never notice, because the baby is not screaming!

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          rebekahELLEposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          I nursed in public as discreetly as possible and never cared what people thought. It is mildly humorous to me that those most opposing it are giving no thought to the baby being nourished but only to the 'perversion' of a woman's breast being sucked on, our prudish English overtones here in the US!

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    Valerie Fposted 14 years ago

    I also have to wonder about the breast fetishists who would enjoy watching a woman breastfeed her child.
    
    Get over yourselves. Breasts were made to feed babies, not for men's jollies. And didn't your mother teach you not to stare?

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    Write at Homeposted 14 years ago

    I live in Washington state, and they just passed a law making it fully legal to nurse in public (before it was kind of a gray area legally). I have nursed my son frequently in public for almost two years now, and it's starting to get kind of funny because he is old enough now to pull up my shirt himself whenever he wants a bit. No one has ever hassled me, but god help them if they ever do!

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    Davinagirl3posted 14 years ago

    If your baby's hungry, your baby's gotta eat.  Everyone else can find something else to be angry about.

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    johnnyfrposted 14 years ago

    Just do it. It's natural. Forget those who don't like it.

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    LondonGirlposted 14 years ago

    "Disgusting" is far too strong.
    
    In my experience, the baby covers the breast all by himself when feeding, anyway (-:

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